Guest Posted August 30, 2006 Posted August 30, 2006 Hi all, I went on a date a couple of weeks ago with a guy I really like. Everything appeared to go well, and I was pretty sure it was going to go to a second. He hasn't called yet and hasn't returned my phone calls, so I started racking my brain to think what could've gone wrong. We started talking about our friends being married and I asked if he'd consider marrying one day. I also talked about my own plans... Maybe this topic scared him away.... My biggest fear is I've ruined things and I'll never hear from him again. Are men scared off by this type of conversation? Would this be a deal breaker for you?
Tony T Posted August 30, 2006 Posted August 30, 2006 Some men would be scared away by that sort of conversation, others would not. As a practical matter, it probably isn't a good idea to bring up the topic of marriage for a month or two after you've started to see somebody...and even then talk about it in a general way. Some men will ask you right off the bat if that's something you may be interested in in the future. Women who ask that question seem to get in more trouble than men because more women are interested in the topic of marriage (in my opinion). For a man who is intelligent and open minded, this would not be a deal breaker. But so much of it depends on what has recently happened in his life and what just went down. People are just plain weird about stuff. If you think the topic of marriage might be a turn off for some people, try talking about death at the next party you attend...haha! (Sorry to mention both topics in the same sentence.) I think you are much better off holding your mention of the marriage topic for a while if you think you want to get serious with a guy. For many men, that sort of thing has to be done very gradually...over time. I personally am not afraid of the topic at all but I am not particularly fond of a lady bringing it up in the context of our date. It could be construed as she is smitten to the max and already envisioning having kids with me...and I'm am envisioning all the child support payments...haha!
Charisma Posted August 30, 2006 Posted August 30, 2006 Okay I'll admit it was not a topic to bring up so early on. I have no plans to marry right now myself but I hope to one day. I was just curious as to what his plans were in the future. By no way was I insinuating that he marry me. He may have thought that...I don't know. I just thought if he liked me enough this wouldn't ruin everything.
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