james007 Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 Ok the date went well yesterday except at the tail end before I left her house last night. As I was going out to my car she got in the car with me and started kissing me and reaching for my crotch. I pulled her hand away and instead gave her a hand job. Afterwards she didn't even bother to give me one in return. She just kissed me and said goodnight. Then I asked "you are not going to give me a hand job" then she said "well you pulled my hand away" then she started kissing me again and then I said "ok goodnight." I pulled her hand away because I wanted to test her reaction to see if she would persist in meeting my sexual needs or if she was just going to give up easily. This test has proven that she's just not into me. I think if she was really into me then she would not have given up so easily when I took her hand away from my crotch. Now I'm pissed at her (although I didn't show it).
rina_r Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 You got what you asked for. You pushed her away, now what do you expect? Stop playing games, then nobody will be pissed off.
Author james007 Posted August 29, 2006 Author Posted August 29, 2006 I had this planned out in my mind before the date that I would let her be the one to initiate any sexual contact. I decided I would pleasure her but I would not let her pleasure me unless she insisted on it.
Guest Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 ok WHY are you testing her? WHY are you playing games? you're confusing...
Author james007 Posted August 29, 2006 Author Posted August 29, 2006 I've decided to cut out oral sex either. She gives me oral sometimes but I'm going to tell her not to do that anymore.
blind_otter Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 Why are you being a jerk to your GF? Any special reason or just general jerkiness?
Sally00 Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 why are you testing her? and why are you playing games? don't get mad so easily... it's not really a sexual NEED... that's for marriage get to know your gf, talk, have fun... stop acting like a relationship is just sexual
Author james007 Posted August 29, 2006 Author Posted August 29, 2006 What is so jerky about not letting her touch my crotch? This was a test to see her interest level in me and she failed. She's not into me.
Author james007 Posted August 29, 2006 Author Posted August 29, 2006 why are you testing her? and why are you playing games? don't get mad so easily... it's not really a sexual NEED... that's for marriage get to know your gf, talk, have fun... stop acting like a relationship is just sexual For you it might be something saved for marriage. I'm not religious like you so don't try to push your religious beliefs about sex on me.
Sally00 Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 What is so jerky about not letting her touch my crotch? This was a test to see her interest level in me and she failed. She's not into me. Seems like YOU'RE not into her... you're just into your sick tests.
blind_otter Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 What is so jerky about not letting her touch my crotch? This was a test to see her interest level in me and she failed. She's not into me. Um, it was a poorly designed test. As far as I can tell she respected your wishes, which could indicate that she repects you as a person and cares about you. I mean, if she says NO do you pressure her to continue? No, that would be rude.
Author james007 Posted August 29, 2006 Author Posted August 29, 2006 Men and women are different. When a woman says no to sex she means no. When a man says no then he might mean yes but he's just playing hard to get. I mean think about it. No I would not pressure her if she said no. I'm asking the women here who are really into their boyfriends. If your boyfriend pulled your hand away from his crotch would you try to talk him into letting you give him a hand job or would you give up easily and assume he doesn't want it??
blind_otter Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 Men and women are different. When a woman says no to sex she means no. When a man says no then he might mean yes but he's just playing hard to get. I mean think about it. No I would not pressure her if she said no. I'm asking the women here who are really into their boyfriends. If your boyfriend pulled your hand away from his crotch would you try to talk him into letting you give him a hand job or would you give up easily and assume he doesn't want it?? I would assume he doesn't want it. Yes, men and women are different. The way we get around our differences is by creating an open line of communication so we can clear things up when misunderstandings occur. What you are doing only makes things worse. I have dumped guys for acting that way.
Sally00 Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 Men and women are different. When a woman says no to sex she means no. When a man says no then he might mean yes but he's just playing hard to get. I mean think about it. No I would not pressure her if she said no. I'm asking the women here who are really into their boyfriends. If your boyfriend pulled your hand away from his crotch would you try to talk him into letting you give him a hand job or would you give up easily and assume he doesn't want it?? I am a woman really into my boyfriend of 7 months. If I was like this and my boyfriend pulled his hand away, I would respect his wish. He respects me, so why should I not respect HIM? I agree with "blind otter" on this one. I really wouldn't see this as a test... unless he gave me a i'm-just-playing-hard-to-get look... Instead of testing her, why don't you talk to her about it?
Guest Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 You have dumped guys for playing hard to get? Or you have dumped guys who really didn't want a hand job? And how could you tell the difference between the guy who really didn't want one and the guy who was just playing hard to get?
Author james007 Posted August 29, 2006 Author Posted August 29, 2006 I would assume he doesn't want it. Yes, men and women are different. The way we get around our differences is by creating an open line of communication so we can clear things up when misunderstandings occur. What you are doing only makes things worse. I have dumped guys for acting that way. Dumped guys for playing hard to get? or dumped guys who really didn't want a hand job at the time for whatever reason? And how could you tell the difference between the guys who didn't want a hand job and the guys who were just playing hard to get?
Moai Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 Maybe you aren't that into her. Why test her in the first place? I can't conceive of a time when I would push a woman away who grabbed me--that I was dating. If a woman touches you that way she is initiating sex, and that is always a good thing. You are describing using sex as a weapon the way a lot of (bitchy) women do. Don't worry too much about it, though, as you are on the track to freaking this chick out and causing her to break up with you, and then you'll be back to grabbing yourself. Life is way too short, man. Take it while you can get it.
blind_otter Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 Dumped guys for playing hard to get? or dumped guys who really didn't want a hand job at the time for whatever reason? And how could you tell the difference between the guys who didn't want a hand job and the guys who were just playing hard to get? Dumped guys for playing games. The difference between the game players and the guys who honestly didn't want a hand job? (I don't do those, I'm 26. I have sex. )... The game players always ended up messing up royally one way or another and getting caught being jack @sses.
Adora Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 How do you figure she wasn't into you? She DID initiate the first move by placing her hand on your crotch area, as you described. YOU pushed it away - she respected that.. now you think she doesn't like you? What is with the mixed signals you are sending? Lesson #1, women do NOT read minds, so please stop assuming so.
Author james007 Posted August 29, 2006 Author Posted August 29, 2006 How do you figure she wasn't into you? She DID initiate the first move by placing her hand on your crotch area, as you described. YOU pushed it away - she respected that.. now you think she doesn't like you? What is with the mixed signals you are sending? Lesson #1, women do NOT read minds, so please stop assuming so. It is quite possible for a woman who is not into her man to make half hearted attempts at pleasuring him sexually. Anyway I called her this morning. She said she would call me later this evening and we could talk about last night. I do want to have a talk with her.
Author james007 Posted August 29, 2006 Author Posted August 29, 2006 During our short phone conversation this morning she claims she didn't understand why I didn't want to be touched last night. What I don't understand is how she can say she's not in the mood for sex one minute and then a few hours later start getting sexual with me. I thought she wasn't in the mood!
blind_otter Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 During our short phone conversation this morning she claims she didn't understand why I didn't want to be touched last night. What I don't understand is how she can say she's not in the mood for sex one minute and then a few hours later start getting sexual with me. I thought she wasn't in the mood! because our moods change. that's normal. Otherwise you would get angry and then stay that way. Forever.
Buttaflyy Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 It seems you've got a lot to learn about women. Are you listening to anyone here? She made an attempt that you refused. She even told you that she doesn't understand why you did it, which proves that she wanted to initiate with you and felt rejected. You don't see things too clearly. You ask why she'd say she wasn't in the mood and change her mind? I'd think you'd be happy she changed her mind. Why are you playing this guessing game anyways? She sounds like someone who's open to talking things out. Instead of guessing why she does things a certain way or her reasoning, maybe you should just ask her next time. And if you want her to initiate be gracious when she does.
Adora Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 It is quite possible for a woman who is not into her man to make half hearted attempts at pleasuring him sexually. If you really believe she was 'teasing' you, you shouldn't be in a relationship, sexual at that! STOP READING IN BETWEEN THE LINES and look FACT strait in the eyes! Sheeesh... you are making problems out of NOTHING! Please, stop now before you scare the poor girl away for good!
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