The truth about one income households

[Moose]

Wouldn't most agree that the one income household would be most fruitful if the bread winner was 100% supported by his/her significant other?

 

If he/she were pampered, praised, and made comfortable at their place of refuse from the workplace?

 

And wouldn't most agree that if he/she were treated this way, that they would be more apt to return such treatment to their partner?

 

Wouldn't most agree that this could contribute to a happy marriage, or, "relationship"......?

 

My thoughts are, most people who have a family with both parents working, are only trying to become wealthy without realizing just how rich they truly are.....

[tinktronik]

read roo's roto virus thread........ :lmao:

 

but imagine all your buddies are going golfing and you cant because the kid is sick and you can't go.

 

And Tudor I was pullin' your leg.

 

I don't have kids so I am not acting.... I just observe the others and know I would not want to be in their shoes for nothin'.

 

I see them at the grocery store......three wee ones...one screaming....one running off.. and then watch them load up the kids and the gorceries. I cannot imagine 24/7 of that.

So, you've seen me and my three at the store have you?lol. The one that runs off will very briefly realize he is lost and backtrack . Then I have to make it to the car pretending to be a penguin so as no one gets run over . Its worth it durring the fun moments and a pain but still worth it in the not so fun ones. The whole have or not have kids thing is a personal descision , not wrong or right .

[rainfall]

Personally for me I would not be able to be in an one income household. I don't want have to feel depend on my SO for money. I am a grown women and completly able to take care of my own bills and help him pay for half of the bills we share. I also don't want to feel like I have to be a "housewife" to him and cook and clean. That is just not something I do. (We lived in a place for 5 years.....We still don't know to this day if the oven worked or not there)

[a4a]

 

My thoughts are, most people who have a family with both parents working, are only trying to become wealthy without realizing just how rich they truly are.....

 

 

Ahhhh...... no most are trying to pay the bills,,,,, rent, food. :lmao:

 

If you have a young couple married and working a minimum wage jobs they are not trying to get rich but trying to keep food in their guts.

 

not all people make enough money to support the family with just one income..... wouldn't that be nice though if it were true. keep dreamin'

[Roo]

Roo, please don't take this the wrong way.....ok? But, if you're serious about this post, and you're not being sarcastic, this is exactly what I'm talking about.

 

Whether or not your post is really what's going on in your real life, it does go on in millions of families world wide.

 

And I personally think that's why kids don't know, or understand how to act in society.

 

It's too easy to find someone to hang out and watch the brats while we go out and take care of business.

 

A parent that's dedicated to staying home, involving the children in the marriage, and concentrating on educating their offspring how to act, behave, and interact with society can prove more valuable to those children than any amount of money mommy or daddy brings home.

 

It's our job as parents to put in the extra labor and time to allow them to tag along and experience the trip to the store, to interact with others, these are life long lessons.

 

Hmmm well first off my children are not brats M is a 4 mo old baby and could'nt be a brat if she tried K is a VERY well behave 20 mo old. Neither is a BRAT...

 

But for the sake of argument I'll clarify. FOR EXAMPLE, yesterday I had appts for all of us together at the chiro we got up fed everyone and headed out, 45 min car ride to the chiro, we all got adjusted K played with the toys and teddy bears in the office said hello to our DR Donna and her Recept. JUDY (her new thing is learning and saying names) And of course as usually I was complimented on my sweet sweet children, from there we went to Target where we ran into my OBGYN with her 3 yr old son *sh'es also very pg with her second* Her son was being lound and bossy, and she said to me ohh look how good k's being, but then she's always good isn't she... I ALWAYS take k with me to the OB they love her there and she loves to go... I NORMALLY try to do my SHOPPING without them because it's just that much faster to get in and out without loading and unloading kids and Groceries.

 

So you see my point isn't that I leave the kids at home all the time it's that when the situation is more difficult it's sometimes a wiser choice. How many parents have you seen in the store loosing it because their kids are acting up and they are EMBARASSED because they are in public so they do one of two things...

 

They freak out and act in a way they normally wouldn't, or they give in and let the child get their way to stop the yelling or tantrum... Sorry NO WAY JOSE!! Not in my house.. not in the store NEVER, I handle my kids poor behavior consistently and I NEVER EVER GIVE IN... you know what they say never let em see you sweat, give em an inch they'll take a mile... once you show a kid that they can break you you're done! So by avoiding HAVING to take the kids with me to to grocery store when I can, I avoid having them out in one of the more stressful situations. They are with me occaisionally, and they still behave, but I hope at this point you are getting my point.

 

You need to teach your children how to behave at home first, wher you are in a controlled setting lifes lessons on how to behave out at the grocery store are not really relavent yet Moose... For pete's sake the kids not even two... but again it's not like they never get out and interact with people I just choose the grocery store as my place to get something done I'm busy workign on another task, therefore not at my best to work on their "Interactions" a Good parent will choose the moments to do this "work" with their children when they can teach the best lesson and not be distracted by their own need to get something done.

[Roo]

Wouldn't most agree that the one income household would be most fruitful if the bread winner was 100% supported by his/her significant other?

 

If he/she were pampered, praised, and made comfortable at their place of refuse from the workplace?

 

And wouldn't most agree that if he/she were treated this way, that they would be more apt to return such treatment to their partner?

 

Wouldn't most agree that this could contribute to a happy marriage, or, "relationship"......?

 

My thoughts are, most people who have a family with both parents working, are only trying to become wealthy without realizing just how rich they truly are.....

 

ha ha ha you talk out both sides of your mouth at the same time Moose...'

 

If staying home to raise our children is the most important thing:

 

Wouldn't most agree that the one income household would be most fruitful if the CHILD REARING PARENT WAS 100% supported by his/her significant other?

 

 

If he/she were pampered, praised, and given some time to rest his/her mind and body at the end of a long challenging day with the children? if his/her partner respected the work he/she did all day at home with the children and treated him/her as an equal rather than someone who should dote on them.

 

And wouldn't most agree that if he/she were treated this way, that they would be more apt to return such treatment to their partner?

 

 

My thoughts are, most people who have a family with both parents working, are only trying to get by, they are trying to make ends meet and the pressures of having to be all things to all people often leads them to BOTH Being totally exhausted physically and emotionally. Which makes it all the more important to both them and their children that they be equal in their partnership and help eachother find time to refresh and renew themselves.

 

And so what you are saying then Moose is that only the relationship with the SAH parent is important to the child that the working parent shouldn't be expected to participate and be responsible for his/her children becasue they are tired from working??

 

HAHAHAHA my H knows he has the easier of the two jobs an is quite happy I only expect him to earn his paycheck while he's at work as I wear several hats during those hours. in fact when we have discussed what our options would be in the future if I were to make enough $$ for it to be a choice he said " I don't think you could pay me enough to do your job its much harder" ha ha.. lovingly and jokingly of course because my H is a very involved father.

 

 

I believe ideally that both parents will partake as equally as possible in raising the chidren, so that the kids feel close and loved and supporeted emotionally by both parents. For example...

 

My H works hard at a very physical job all day, when he gets home it's about 5 pm he comes in to greet the kids first and see if I need a hand with anything or a minute to myself. Then he heads back out to tend to the yard, garbage etc... We typically eat dinner around 6pm and then one of us cleans up the kiddie and clears the table and the other puts away leftovers and washes the dishes/loads the dishwasher. Then we, or rather more HE plays with the kids, I use this time to finish up any of the day's chores Iv'e not finished, then we all sit down together a a family and play/watch tv etc. At 8 pm one of us will go change K into her jammies and brush teeth with her while the other tidy's the toys in the LR, then we read a story together and one of us takes her to bed, this is typicaly him he loves to do the night night routine with her. In fact when she gets up early enough in the am he's really happy to see her before work, and on the weekends.. like today, He lets me sleep in a bit and he gets her up and starts her day while I catch a few extra Z's since I'm up later than him with the baby.

 

We are teaching our children that it's important to respect eachother, and help eachother that neither of us is more important, and that things work the most smoothly when instead of being caught up on who's job a particular task is we work together to get it done.

[Roo]

hmmm I guess you've got no answer for that?

[Guest]

hmmm I guess you've got no answer for that?

 

You go, Roo!

[Moose]

My thoughts are, most people who have a family with both parents working, are only trying to get by, they are trying to make ends meet and the pressures of having to be all things to all people often leads them to BOTH Being totally exhausted physically and emotionally. Which makes it all the more important to both them and their children that they be equal in their partnership and help eachother find time to refresh and renew themselves.

I could NOT agree more.

And so what you are saying then Moose is that only the relationship with the SAH parent is important to the child that the working parent shouldn't be expected to participate and be responsible for his/her children becasue they are tired from working??

No, I'm not saying this at all. Quite the contrary. My exact words were:

And wouldn't most agree that if he/she were treated this way, that they would be more apt to return such treatment to their partner?

What do you think that means? To me, it means that when I come home, and it's a clean house with no clutter, my supper is ready, the boys are eager to help out, the younger ones are getting along and everyone has done their chores......it's a clear indication that my family appreciates what I do for them putting in the neccessary hours of work away from home to provide.

 

In return, I'm motivated to do more. With that enviroment, I naturally want to be involved with my family and share the duties......but that's just me....

HAHAHAHA my H knows he has the easier of the two jobs an is quite happy I only expect him to earn his paycheck while he's at work as I wear several hats during those hours. in fact when we have discussed what our options would be in the future if I were to make enough $$ for it to be a choice he said " I don't think you could pay me enough to do your job its much harder" ha ha.. lovingly and jokingly of course because my H is a very involved father.

Sounds like our house. We're not that different in that respect at all.

My H works hard at a very physical job all day, when he gets home it's about 5 pm he comes in to greet the kids first and see if I need a hand with anything or a minute to myself. Then he heads back out to tend to the yard, garbage etc...

Mine's not physical anymore.....but this sounds very familiar....

We typically eat dinner around 6pm and then one of us cleans up the kiddie and clears the table and the other puts away leftovers and washes the dishes/loads the dishwasher.

More like they would eat, whilst I burn the rest of daylight tending to the yard......I've needed to change this for decades......

Then we, or rather more HE plays with the kids,

Did this too with the boys while they grew up......until we were buying 3 coffee tables average a year.......those were the times....amen to that!!....

I use this time to finish up any of the day's chores Iv'e not finished,

Most everything is done at this point.....or Mrs. Moose just let's it go till morn'. No biggie to me.....let her lay on the sofa.

then we all sit down together a a family and play/watch tv etc. At 8 pm one of us will go change K into her jammies and brush teeth with her while the other tidy's the toys in the LR, then we read a story together and one of us takes her to bed, this is typicaly him he loves to do the night night routine with her.

I read stories until they were old enough to read themselves. But we have a routine very much like your own.....

We are teaching our children that it's important to respect eachother, and help eachother that neither of us is more important, and that things work the most smoothly when instead of being caught up on who's job a particular task is we work together to get it done.

Which is so FANTASTIC that it warms my heart to hear it!!!

 

So.....I don't understand why we're so different then?

 

Whatever impression you've developed of me.....I think it's a little off......