Binnie Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 Hi, A diary entry i just wrote. NOt sure why im posting it on here, i guess to give people who are unhappy in their relationships who dont have the strength to get out, the knowledge that they can. No matter how much you love them Good luck. xo I’m going to leave Dan, at least we have somewhat already ended it. Daniel, the guy that I fell absolutely head over heals about, the one who for years has been telling me how happy I make him, how happy he is for finding the love of his life and how happy he is for finding the girl he will marry. Not sure if I’m totally naive in love, or that its true about being “blinded by love”, but he’s not the guy I thought I fell in love with. I admit now we always fought, he was always interested in the party life, the alcohol, his mates, the money and his work, but over the years I felt he was not growing up, and I feel I have. Committed to me he may have been, but a man who is totally incompetent of expressing his deepest feelings, or hearing those of others without feeling uncomfortable, or turning it into an argument. Too many times we fought, loud, abusive somewhat scary fights. A man who I now see is a cheater, an unloyal and very weak man to his drunken episodes. A man who would rather throw away 3 and a half years of something that could have been, to a girl with no morals who only wanted him for one night. I’ve learnt a few things from this relationship. 1. No matter how in love I am, keep my eyes open. 2. Listen to my gut instinct. I sometimes ignore it but it always rings truth. Always! 3. Question how I’m feeling. Look after myself, not always the partner. 4. Learn to give a little more space to a partner if so desires 5. Don’t lose sight on who I am! Why they fell in love with me to start with. Dont give up me or change me for them. 6. Learn to stand up for myself; don’t always give in to their needs. I have needs to. A good man he is, otherwise I wouldn’t have loved him so much to start with. I do wish him the best. I just feel I’m on a different page to him, and I really hope this new page is full of happiness.
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