gemmab2020 Posted August 27, 2006 Posted August 27, 2006 Got chatting to chatting a guy the other morning on my way to work... turns out he had just started working in my place (I was handing my notice in that day!) and then the following morning got chatting to him again... ended up telling the girl I work with about him, i thought he was well cute!! I was standing outside the office having a cigarette break and he came over to borrow my lighter and got chatting to me again... asked me for my number and I said I would think about it. Next morning on the train he was sitting waiting on me, had kept me a seat next to him. I thought it was a really nice thought! Only problem is he made a comment about coming in to sort me out... I told him straight off that if he was after that sort of thing that he was looking in the wrong place and he had mistaken me for the wrong type of girl. He apologised and just said he felt a bit nervous and his heart was beating 10 to the dozen... he said he wanted to see me and just see how things go. I ended up giving him my number after his 3rd attempt at asking for it on my last day at work. He has paid me quite a few compliments, telling me that he things in really nice, walked past saying i was mighty fine looking etc... I am just confused now. It's been 2 days and I haven't heard from, but am I even going to?? What an acceptable time limit when you haven't actually arranged a date??? And am I dillusional that he actually does like me or is he just after what he can get??? Help!!
Sally00 Posted August 27, 2006 Posted August 27, 2006 I wouldn't worry. It's only been 2 days. Give him a chance to breathe and plan out what he's going to do next. He's nervous, remember? Don't stress out too much.
pinkFirm Posted August 28, 2006 Posted August 28, 2006 ofcourse he will call... he was eager to get your number still after you turned that question down. Maybe he thinks that if he calls right away, you will turn his invitation down. And he seems like a nervous type of guy so he is going crazy trying to figure the perfect time to call.
Author gemmab2020 Posted August 28, 2006 Author Posted August 28, 2006 ah..... but is he nervous or is he just after sex???? How can I be sure?! I have a lot to learn about the male mind and the more I try to learn, the more I get confused. How do you mae sure a guy doesn't use you?? And i have been told that some guys just get kicks from getting your number then never calling!!!! It all just seems a little too confusing for me!!!!
pinkFirm Posted August 28, 2006 Posted August 28, 2006 ... And i have been told that some guys just get kicks from getting your number then never calling!!!! You know that is True, however, he wont call if he is not interested. But he seemed to be interested in you by giving you compliments and saving you a seat at the train. Meaning he was looking foward to seing you again. I gave my number to my now bf and that same day he called to invite me to hang, so i did see him that night. After that night he didnt call for about a whole entire week. When he finally called to invite out bc he wanted to see me --ha. i made him wait 3 weeks to see me again.
insomnie Posted August 28, 2006 Posted August 28, 2006 ah..... but is he nervous or is he just after sex???? How can I be sure?! I have a lot to learn about the male mind and the more I try to learn, the more I get confused. How do you mae sure a guy doesn't use you?? And i have been told that some guys just get kicks from getting your number then never calling!!!! It all just seems a little too confusing for me!!!! Well, you never really know with anyone. The only way to tell what he's after and what kind of guy he is is by getting to know him, which you can do after he calls. It's always a gamble, but that's life. From what you've written, he does sound interested. I'm betting he calls.
Author gemmab2020 Posted August 29, 2006 Author Posted August 29, 2006 Still no call! Although I started a new job today (and I am on the net already!!!!) and I am hoping that it will be his conversation starter and that he will call tonight to see how my first day went. I am almost ready to give up! I just feel that he should have called by now??? What is the usual wiating time? If he contacts me after 2 weeks, should I still accept a date or will I be an after-thought then??? I am not used to the whole dating game and having to sit and wait on guys phoning, yet I can't seem to just forget about him and put him out of my head. And yet something tells me when I am not thinking about it... the phone will ring! Sorry for my babbling, Just have a head full of thoughts!
jenniferlm Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 Well if he waits more than a week, I probably wouldn't go out with him. JMO.
Author gemmab2020 Posted August 30, 2006 Author Posted August 30, 2006 Still nothing!!! The week is almost up and his number has not popped up on my screen yet... Just can't understand what joy guys get from showering you with compliments and then asking for your number then not calling!!! This is the type of guy that gives all men a bad name. Where are all the nice guys????
DeeBrod83 Posted August 30, 2006 Posted August 30, 2006 It's Wednesday though... I would think he'd probably call tomorrow or Friday to get together this weekend. I would really rack this up to him being nervous more than a jerk, but then again you never really know. There are plenty of 'em out there that's for sure! I would just try and calm down about it.... it seems like once you stop caring is when things happen! Good luck to ya girlie!
Author gemmab2020 Posted August 30, 2006 Author Posted August 30, 2006 Ae cheers, thanks!!! Cheered me up loads. I can imagine him sitting there afraid to call now incase I reject him... the poor thing!
Author gemmab2020 Posted August 31, 2006 Author Posted August 31, 2006 he must be very very nervous... that's a week almost up and no phonecall! I am going to join a convent and give up on men all together!!!
Marielle Posted August 31, 2006 Posted August 31, 2006 That's so weird he didn t call, after what you described...Maybe he lost the number? If I had his number or any way of contacting him I address to him- in this case- since he insisted that much and you normally do not give your number.
Author gemmab2020 Posted September 1, 2006 Author Posted September 1, 2006 well... he did put my number directly into his phone so I am doubtful that he has lost it! Boys just suck!
rina_r Posted September 1, 2006 Posted September 1, 2006 it seems like once you stop caring is when things happen! Very very true. And if things dont happen - they weren't meant to be. Something better is waiting for you.
Author gemmab2020 Posted September 1, 2006 Author Posted September 1, 2006 Aw thanks.... that is so so true. Things happen for a reason! The lesson I have learnt from this is don't give your number out... take his number instead and then I can choose the pace! Think I might need to head out onto the town on Saturday night now... find myself a victim!!
rina_r Posted September 1, 2006 Posted September 1, 2006 I usually suggest to contact through email or messenger (with my busy schedule it is hard to get in touch with me over the phone). Or...you could play a joke - give him the number to a local psychiatric clinic!
superconductor Posted September 1, 2006 Posted September 1, 2006 And if things dont happen - they weren't meant to be. Something better is waiting for you. Things happen for a reason! I am consistently astounded that otherwise grown, thoughtful people actually believe that the universe is somehow providing reasons for chaotic events in people's lives. Here's a quick reality check: Events don't have any reason attached to them aside from the reasons we create ourselves. And nothing is meant to be. Life is chaotic and wonderful and tragic and funny. But there's no reason behind it all. That is as it should be. Otherwise we're all just playing out predestined roles.
rina_r Posted September 1, 2006 Posted September 1, 2006 Whatever. I am not changing my opinion just bc you think different. My life experience proved my words were right.Also, my comment was directed to Gemma.
Author gemmab2020 Posted September 4, 2006 Author Posted September 4, 2006 Thanks Rina... I do think that ifsomething that you want doesn't happen, it's because it wasn't meant to be and that something far better is waiting around the corner!! You just helped me remember that. Mwahhh!!!
Interloper Posted September 4, 2006 Posted September 4, 2006 Here's a quick reality check: Events don't have any reason attached to them aside from the reasons we create ourselves. And nothing is meant to be. Life is chaotic and wonderful and tragic and funny. But there's no reason behind it all. That is as it should be. Otherwise we're all just playing out predestined roles. I disagree, however everyone has there own theories, and mine can't be proven other than my own personal experiences and knowledge. One thing i have learnt though, is that the state of my mind has always determined my reality. When i was in a grossly negative mind state when i was younger, i constantly attracted the negative into my life. When i learnt and realised what was happening and began to be positive, i suddenly attracted positive situations, experiences and people into my life. I have gotten to the point now (after years of developing and progressing myself) where i can now bring into my life anything i want simply by visualising and truly believing that it will happen. You literally create your own reality. Personally, i just believe that it's all physics, and that everyone and everything is connected. Thought and feelings are energies, at their base level they are simply atoms vibrating just like everything else. If you think negatively you will bring this into your life. If you think positively you will bring this into your life. I personally believe that physics is still in its "dark ages" at the moment. It's mechanistic in principle. For example, a physicist will look at a body and all they see is a bunch of organs, tissue, bones and stuff, yet we all KNOW that a spirit exists however physics denies this because it cannot measure it. You don't need a degree in physics to know this. Some would say that i'm trying to discredit the field, given that i'm a scientist working in microbiology, but not true, they are both intrinsicly linked, again something that science denies, and curbs the progession of the field(s). It's easier said than done to be positive though in this world, when probably 95% of people are living (and conditioned) in the negative. Anyways, enough rambling. Just some theories and thoughts that "cannot be proved"
Adunaphel Posted September 4, 2006 Posted September 4, 2006 I am sorry that he did not call (and like the other posters, I'm surprised that you haven't heard from him). I wonder if he lost enthusiasm after having to try so hard to get your number. I'm not a guy, but I'm shy. And if I were in a similar situation I might not call either. I wonder if what went through his mind was something like: "I had to ask her all those times to get her number, and she gave it to me like she was doing me a favour or to get rid of me. I am not so sure I want to keep pursuing, and risk making a fool of me, someone who is clerly not so interested. I'll call people who appreciate me!"
Guest Posted September 7, 2006 Posted September 7, 2006 how about breathing and giving the guy a little time - he did just start a new job as did you. the first week of new jobs (actually longer than that) are usually very chaotic - straight out exhausting - give the guy some time to get settled and if he calls, then take a chance - you never know.
Author gemmab2020 Posted September 7, 2006 Author Posted September 7, 2006 Well I just keep telling myself now that he was a waste of space and probably wasn't worthy of my attention anyway. Makes me feel better! Every time I have a number on my screen and I don't recognise it, I am still thinking it his him but it never is! So time to move on now me thinks. My knight in shinig armour is out there, he is just fighting his way to me as we speak, trying to search me out. I know he is!!!
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