Beee Posted August 27, 2006 Posted August 27, 2006 This question might have already been asked... but in a relationship, how important is sex? Things with my current boyfriend are a bit unsteady, not sure if its going to end so or if we'll manage to fix things (we've been together for 8 years on and off...). Sex has had its ups and downs, we have had good sex, very good sex infcat, but most of the time I feel there is no passion and its just having sex cause its human instinct... I haven't had that many sexual relationships, however I know there is this one other guy who I feel incredibly attracted to... both emotionally and physically. We have a very good sexual chemistry. My question is, can sex determine ( or help you making your mind up) whether you will work with someone? Please don't think sex is everyhting for me, its not. I think it can be important but its most definitely not the most important thing in a relationship.... so please no shallow, meaningless cooments. Thanks for any replies )
Tony T Posted August 27, 2006 Posted August 27, 2006 Sex may help you make up your mind but that would be serious mistake. Sex seldom stays the same, in quality or frequency in a relationship. I do think you need to find a boyfriend with whom you can have more of a bond than simply physical sex. But in a long term relationship or marriage, there are a number of components that are very important, sex being one of them. Don't be thinking with your genitals when it comes to finding a good partner. There's a lot more to it than that. I'm not meaning this to be shallow or meaningless, as you requested it not be, I'm just answering this as best I can. Frankly, I don't know exactly what criteria is best in ascertaining the possiblities of success with somebody. I'm sure it's a combination of feelings, intellectual compatibility, shared interests, shared character and personality traits, shared religious beliefs or respect for one another's, sexual compatibility, getting along with each other's friends and relatives, etc. etc. etc. Who the hell knows? I suspect the answer is very different for everybody.
stoopid_guy Posted August 27, 2006 Posted August 27, 2006 I'd say intimacy more than sex. I read an article some time ago that said lack of french kissing was actually a better indicator of "love on the rocks" than lack of sex. Keep in mind, you're going to have ups and downs (no pun intended) too. It's when one partner gets extremely frustrated or is feeling "used" that sex becomes an issue.
Outcast Posted August 27, 2006 Posted August 27, 2006 I'm sure it's a combination of feelings, intellectual compatibility, shared interests, shared character and personality traits, shared religious beliefs or respect for one another's, sexual compatibility, getting along with each other's friends and relatives, etc. etc. etc. Who the hell knows? Sounds pretty much like you do I think you nailed it. Maybe you know more than you think you do
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