Guest Posted August 26, 2006 Posted August 26, 2006 Ok so I have been going to my counselor now for about 3 years. Hes a great guy love him to pieces he has been wonderful through alot of things going on in my life. However last time I went for my appointment I noticed, 2 things that I never noticed before. Maybe he has done them and I didn't notice, anyway this time I did. I had some mints in my mouth becasue my mouth was dry and I had a sinus infection a week prior to the meeting so the mints felt good to my throat. I told him I was sorry about me talking with those mints in my mouth, he said "NO problem." He then opens his drawer to his desk as i'm talking and pulls out some hard candy, pops it in his mouth. Kind of like he was mirroiring what I was doing. Ok fine no harm done, not sure why he did but anyway, the next thing was, he brought his chair closer to me as I was talking. I was looking down, then happned to look up and saw where he was looking down my shirt. Yes I was bent over some, was tired of sitting the way I was, so bent over in the chair slightly. No big deal, but then I see where its obvious he is looking, and even moves to position himself better for viiewing. When I relized what he was doing I moved back to the orginal position I was in. I never noticed him doing these things before and while there might not be anything wrong with it other than mirriring me, expcet for the looking down my shirt thing, why would he do that? I have had candy/mints before and he never got candy out for himself. Time for another counselor or is what he is doing meaningless and i have nothing to worry about?
phyrespryte Posted August 27, 2006 Posted August 27, 2006 I'm not sure why the mirroring thing would be bad exactly. So I wouldn't really worry about it. The looking down your shirt thing not so great. But you've been with him for 3 years and nothing like that has happened before...right? Are you 100% sure he was looking down your shirt? If anything I'd give him a couple more chances before getting rid of him. Definitely pay attention to his behavior next time. If you keep getting a bad vibe from him and feel uncomfortable then you might want to say something to him or find someonelse.
Guest Posted August 28, 2006 Posted August 28, 2006 I'm not sure why the mirroring thing would be bad exactly. So I wouldn't really worry about it. The looking down your shirt thing not so great. But you've been with him for 3 years and nothing like that has happened before...right? Are you 100% sure he was looking down your shirt? If anything I'd give him a couple more chances before getting rid of him. Definitely pay attention to his behavior next time. If you keep getting a bad vibe from him and feel uncomfortable then you might want to say something to him or find someonelse. Thanks for your reply. I'm not that worried about the mirroring thing, if anything I'm kind of flattered I guess. Yes I'm sure he was looking down my shirt, it was obvious, he even re poistioned himself, to see better. No its not the first time he has ever done that. There have been times I would be talking to him just to look up and catch him starring at my crotch. I guess I keep telling myself its nothing becasue he gives such wonderful advice and he has never tried anything inapproperiate. He just stares. Maybe even though he is a counselor he is just being a man too? Getting his look on? It just seems kind of unethical to me. I have a feeling though its not just me he does that too, he probably does it to others as well. I think thats just how he is.
JackJack Posted August 28, 2006 Posted August 28, 2006 Personally IMO, I do think its pretty unethical. I mean if he went as far to "reposition" himself to get a better look like you said, then that tells me he purposly was doing that. Not sure why, unless he is doing it to get a rise out of you, to see if you will say something, or maybe he felt if you weren't paying attention he could get a quick look. Sure people look, but he is not conducting himself in the best manner for the kind of job he is in, good advice he gives or not.
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