luvtoto Posted August 25, 2006 Posted August 25, 2006 Whenever I have an issue, doesn't matter how big or small, I try desperately to keep it to myself. Until I feel this overwhelming need to spill my guts and tell my friend(s) my problem at that moment. I then feel "release", and feel better. BUT, I don't want to be that kind of friend. You know, the friend with "the problems". Why do I need to vent to feel better? I would prefer to work things out on my own. Just venting once again...
superconductor Posted August 25, 2006 Posted August 25, 2006 You don't need to vent, but you've trained yourself to feel better after you do. That's not a problem, it's just something you have to bear in mind when you're around your friends. So vent here instead.
bluechocolate Posted August 25, 2006 Posted August 25, 2006 Why do I need to vent to feel better? Everyone needs to vent to feel better. People who say they don't are either lying, doing it without knowing it or on their way to an early grave. ...need to spill my guts and tell my friend(s) my problem at that moment. Like the song says, that's what friends are for. The problem is if you're just going on & on about the same thing or if everything is a problem. Then people will get pissed off & start avoiding you.
KittenMoon Posted August 25, 2006 Posted August 25, 2006 A journal might help. But I get the impression you might need that feeling of being "heard". How about an anonymous blog? Maybe you can trick your brain into that same feeling since technically you're telling someone (anyone) how you feel, but without being a burden to a friend.
Author luvtoto Posted August 25, 2006 Author Posted August 25, 2006 I just don't see any of my friends coming to me with their problems. How are they dealing? I have one friend that tells me she doesn't even tell her husband when she has a problem. She'll pick and choose what to share. Wow. But, then again...she does have a lot of stomach problems. She's sick about every other day from something.
KittenMoon Posted August 25, 2006 Posted August 25, 2006 But, then again...she does have a lot of stomach problems. She's sick about every other day from something. Sounds like she's internalizing the stress. I used to get stomach problems from stress. Now luckily, after my break up I just get full on anxiety attacks! In conclusion- keeping it inside doesn't help, but there are a lot of people who don't share because they're embarassed or afraid of what the other person will think of them.
Author luvtoto Posted August 25, 2006 Author Posted August 25, 2006 A journal might help. But I get the impression you might need that feeling of being "heard". It's like a drug to me. Why do people need that feeling of being heard? Is it an attention thing?...because I am shy and usually go out of my way when it comes to needing or wanting attention.
quankanne Posted August 25, 2006 Posted August 25, 2006 doesn't sound like you're trying to be an attention-hog by venting – maybe this is the only way a quiet person like you can work things out? Sometimes writing out your feelings works, other times, a good rant does the trick, but you're acting on instinct to release that stress rather than internalizing it and hurting yourself when it manifests in physical ways. besides, venting is cathartic, it makes you feel better BECAUSE it's off your chest!
Pink Amulet Posted August 25, 2006 Posted August 25, 2006 Why do I need to vent to feel better? I would prefer to work things out on my own. Oh the hilarious irony :lmao:
Author luvtoto Posted August 25, 2006 Author Posted August 25, 2006 doesn't sound like you're trying to be an attention-hog by venting – maybe this is the only way a quiet person like you can work things out? Yes, I am usually quiet. Unless I have an issue I need to discuss. Ugh, and then I am little miss chatterbox. I hate it! I would rather be consistently quiet... If that makes any sense.
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