Ex is back after 1.5 mos of NC - she is wanting to take things slow.

[figgurinoutlife]

I have been doing NC with my ex of 2 years for 1.5 mos. because she said she wanted me back, then started stalling cause she met someone else. The 2 years since we broke up she has treated me like her doormat by coming to me when her and her new boyfriend have a fight, then running back to him. Saying she's still in love with me, regrets breaking up with me, but never actually came back to me. I snapped with her 1.5 mos. ago and went strict NC.

 

Well my ex has forced me to break my 1.5 mos. of NC yesterday by showing up in my driveway and begging for 2 min. of my time to talk. A week before she was blowing up my phone with anonymous calls which I didn't answer. So yesterday she showed up in my driveway before I was leaving for work. I didn't want to talk to her at first but she started crying and says she moved back to my city away from her last ex and is off drugs and staying with her mom. Her last boyfriend got her into drugs, but now she swears she is clean.

 

She says she wants a new beginning with me and she desperately wants to prove she's changed and is still the person I dated 2 years ago. She begged for me to hang out with her that night to talk so I did. We took a walk through the park and started making out and talking. It was fabulous and very romantic. She says everything she ever told me about wanting to be with me again before was true and and that the drugs just completely messed her up. She also said she doesnt know what it is about me but she can't let me go, that there is a void in her life when I don't talk to her and she can't fill it even though she says she has tried. She says she cannot stand not to be able to talk to me and be in my life in someway.

 

She says she was just so messed up when she was with her last ex that she couldn't be with me even though she wanted to. I told her that I cannot do friends with ex's if that is what she is wanting so I asked her what she wanted from me, and she said she is wanting to prove to me that she has changed and is wanting to take things slow starting out.

 

She did not flat out say she wanted a relationship with me but said she wanted to take things slow, kind of work our way into it. I told her over and over I am not one to be ****ed with anymore and she swears up and down she would never mess with me or play with my feelings again. I told her if she plays with my feelings again I am gone.

 

It just sounds like she is wanting to slowly progress at things to see where they go. She was talking about getting her own apt. when she finds a job and I keep wondering why she is not trying to jump head first into a relationship with me. I guess I am ready to jump head first when I'm probably the one who should be cautious, but instead she is wanting to move slow - what's up with that?

 

Do you think I am being set up to be played again or does it sound like she is being sincere? She was soo emotional yesterday begging me to talk with her, and that she needs me and I am the missing part of her life. She says she chewed off all her nails yesterday cause she was so nervous about our date.

 

How should I handle this because I cannot do friends with ex's, it's either all or nothing with her, and I told her I don't like gray areas. Should I be patient for awhile and see what comes of it?

[neiu]

doormat anybody? anybody? doormat?

[figgurinoutlife]

Am I her doormat again? What should I do in this situation?