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Things change when your married....


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Posted

And i don't mean with him and I..nothing has changed there...but our friends treat us differenty. Noone calls us to go out anymore...like now were these homebodid people whose and our ENTIRE personality changed once we said I do.

My mom treats me differently too. I'll call her for advice and she'll answer me by saying your a married adult now..figure it out for yourself

 

 

 

WTF!??!?!?!?!??!

Posted

Well things do change, IHNFC. Whether you like it or not. That's just the way it is. Your needs, wants, and goals are much different than those of single or dating people. That's the whole point of being married, eh? Otherwise, no one ever would.

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Posted

But MY needs and wants haven't changed. So what makes them think were different people?

Posted
But MY needs and wants haven't changed. So what makes them think were different people?

 

If they haven't changed just yet (which is no biggie, you just got married)-- they will. They have to, that's just how things are. If you didn't change, I would be worried. It's human nature, time marches on, whether we want it to or not. Married people are looked at as more "grown up" than unmarried people.

 

Hey, I'm not talking out my ass. I felt the same way as you when I was married. My needs really didn't change. but then I ended the marriage, so I could be single again, so there ya go.

Posted
But MY needs and wants haven't changed. So what makes them think were different people?

 

It probably is a perception in your group of friends and also depends on your age and the age of your friends.

 

If I recall you are younger and perhaps your mother is saying "you think your all grown up enough to get married, so act like a grown up"

 

IMHO kinda snarky..... but I could be wrong.

 

If your friends are young and mostly not married well you have went a different route than them......

 

None of my friends changed their attitudes, H's did though because for 2 years they (married ones) were kinda living that vicarious (sp?) type thing through him......the last single guy in the group who was dating me...

 

Did ya get some dude? :lmao: :lmao:

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Posted

I could be 50 and still need advice from my mom. Adults ned guidance sometimes too. And yes I am young but more mature than about 120% of my friends. It was ok before....I just don't get it.

Posted

maybe mom is trying to give you the proper respect she feels you're due now that you're a married woman?

 

as for your friends, the status quo has changed and they don't know where you stand as a married woman. Especially if you – as a single woman – did all kinds of stuff whenever you wanted to with them and didn't need someone's okay or need to make sure the schedule was cleared. Kinda hard making that change, but if your husband is okay with your friendships, let them know. It might make things a little less stilted for them, because they'll see that you really havent' changed.

Posted

Maybe they including your mom feel kinda "jealous" or left out, or left behind..... My H's friend kinda coped an attitude because he was no longer the available hang out on friday night dude. drink beer while the married guy friend and him rake the leaves and married guy friend is watching his kids while his wife is out :lmao:

 

he was replaced tho, by a new single guy :lmao: :lmao:

Posted

Traditionally, marriage is a major step into adulthood. You enter into a new phase of your life, and it should be different.

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Posted
Traditionally, marriage is a major step into adulthood. You enter into a new phase of your life, and it should be different.

 

But things shouldn't be different...if they are..then to me that's not the right person for you

Posted
But things shouldn't be different...if they are..then to me that's not the right person for you

 

I'm talking about in the eyes of your friends and family. You are different. You went through that threshold, you are Mrs. lastname, now. Not just IHNFC. So in their eyes, you guys are different.

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Posted

Actually I'm Mrs.IHNFC (My last name is WAAAYYYY To unique to change) Plus he's into the liberal thing). But we're still the same people....Maybe its just one of those unanswerable questions.

Posted

Just wait until you have a kid!

Posted
Actually I'm Mrs.IHNFC (My last name is WAAAYYYY To unique to change) Plus he's into the liberal thing). But we're still the same people....Maybe its just one of those unanswerable questions.

 

Actually it is and has been answered.

Posted
Just wait until you have a kid!

 

honestly that is when I do abandon the friends :lmao: :lmao:

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Posted

We're not having kids...Can't stand them....

Posted
We're not having kids...Can't stand them....

 

 

They are good for doing yard work and cleaning toilets when a tad older :lmao: :lmao:

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Posted

Damn...good Point

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