owmyheart Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 My boyfriend broke up with me about 10 days ago. We had been dating for about 4 months but have been friends for over a year. Everything was perfect until both our schedules got busy and it was hard for us to see eachother. He also has a lot of stuff going on in his life right now, and I know he is stressed out. He said he just doesn't have anything left for a relationship, that he feels he is being strecthed too thin. He wanted to stay friends and said if we let things go any further, then we could risk things ending badly and hurting me more and he didn't want that. First I begged and cried and asked him to try make it work, which he agreed to. But after a week, he said he still didn't feel anything and we ended it. I am devastated, I didn't even realize I loved him that much until he was gone. Now I am so depressed. I can't sleep because I have dreams about him, or can't stop thinking about him. I think about him ALL the time. Every second of everyday. I can't eat. I am 5'4" and my weight has dropped to about 100 pounds. I try eat, but my stomache is in knots. People are beggining to comment that I am too thin, but I can't help it. He is a close family friend, so no contact is hard. I sit everyday and worry that he will start seeing someone else. I called him for the first time a few days ago, and we had a nice long chat, just friendly and I didn't mention the relationship, but then he had to go help one of his female friends move and I was soooo jealous even though I never let him know. I worried about it all weekend! I want him back! He is perfect. He has never hurt me, we have never fought. He is always concerned that I am o.k. He said if I ever need to talk or am upset that I can call and we can get through it. He is the whole package...nice, sensitive, sexy, great in the physical/kissing department, funny, caring, great with kids, honest. We made a promise to eachother when we first started dating that honesty was most important, and that if anything ever bothered us we would tell eachother right away. He said that is why he broke it off, because out of respect we promised not to lead the other person on, if it wasn't working for one of us. I just don't know what to do. I sit at home alone everyday and wait for his call, even when I know he isn't able to. This breakup is going to kill me! I need to get him back, but I don't know how! I don't want to seem needy, but I also don't want to ignore him and he moves on. He seems to be fine, but I am devastated. Most of my friends live out of town, and because my family knows him it is hard to talk to them about it. Please help!
Tricia23 Posted August 23, 2006 Posted August 23, 2006 I am so sorry to hear about what happened with you guys...I know the feeling. It sounds like he isn't really sure about what to do with the realationship you guys had. Maybe you should sit him down and have a talk with him and maybe that might help you understand exactly what he is feeling. Ask him everything that comes to mind. Ask him if he is interested in someone else stuff like that etc.... That might help you get some closure on the situation. I know its hard especially knowing that your friendship went from friends to dating. If you really don't want to loose him, try talking to him to see if there is anything you could do to keep it going.If he still says no and there is absolutely nothing you can do, then as hard as it is, try to move on. See if you can still save the friendship and maybe later on a relationshipd might be in the cards for you again. Just keep him close and never give up on something you can't go a day without thinking about!!! The Best Of Luck To You!!
InaPanic Posted August 23, 2006 Posted August 23, 2006 It's very hard when one person is ready to end it and the other person is not. And sometimes because our pride is hurt it makes us THINK we were even more in love & more desperate for that person. I am going through that right now & trying to sort out in my head if I do really love him or if I just became obsessed with him when he started pulling away thinking i had to have him. It makes it harder if you still feel this way being in contact with him. Being friends with him will make you see & hear things you aren't ready for yet & will constantly keep that hope that it will work out. I know right now you are hoping it will work out & for your sake I hope it does.
sad-in-seattle Posted August 23, 2006 Posted August 23, 2006 That really sucks. He sounds like a great guy. You said yourself that you guys were really honest and if it wasn't working out that you guys promised to tell. He kept his promise and told you. You should just be happy that he isn't some jerk of a guy and instead he was a gentleman about it. Although I'm sure it would had made the break-up easier. Sounds like a tough situation, but I would just try to move on (easier said then done.. I know) because it seems that he doesn't want to be in a relationship with you anymore. Give it time and the only thing I think you can hope for is to hope he realizes what he is missing. I think badgering the situation will just make it work. Keep your chin up!
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