Guest Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 I've known my current boyfriend for about two months..but only got serious in the last two and half weeks. We are both in our late 30's..both divorced. I am more mature then him in the relationship department. By this I mean I'm aware of the different stages of a relationship and what happens. He on the other hand is head over heels in love with me like a teenage boy. When I'm with him I feel like two silly teenagers in love. I'm fine with that because it feels good and we have a good time..etc.. He is definintly in a "lust stage" at least that is what it seems like. We are very open about sexual topics and he loves to tease and talk somewhat dirty talk. I do it back to him and enjoy it. We have major sexual chemestry and have made out passionately...but no sex. This has happened on almost every date since we got serious. He apoligizes for getting us hot and bothered and says he can't help it because he loves me so much and desires me. He knows I wasn't ready and says there is no pressure. We had a few dates where we just talked and he had said how much he really enjoyed it. But on the next date again he starts talking about sex and teasing thru the whole date. I'm bad too because I go along with it as I get turn on by his talk. He knows it..and I think he keeps trying thinking I'll do it? Finally I had a long talk one night with him and told him I don't think it's fair of me to tease and make him turned on..then not making love to him. He said he loves when we turn each other on and that he doesn't need the sex..the talking and kissing is just as good. He again said don't worry..no pressure..take all the time you need..I want you do it when you are 100% ready. He also said sorry for all the pressure from him. He justs desires me so much. I've even suggested breaking off the relationship cause it's not fair to him. Or even getting him off in other ways then intercourse which I tried (masterbating him) but he couldn't orgasm so I stopped. Again he says it's no problem, don't worry about it. Recently it went way farther then before. We ended up naked and he penatrated me..but just once..then pulled out. He said sorry and that we got carried away. I agreed... The next night same thing...OMG! So he decided we have to stay away from beds or couches..LOL He said that way we won't get carried away. He was very sweet and loving. He said we have to be stronger and that we can still be intimate thru gentle kisses and such. The next date (last night) went well..we did get a little out of hand..but we would stop and laugh about it..and talk and hold each other. I just seen him today. The minute we got together he started the dirty talk and that he wanted to make love to me tonight after work. I thought he was just joking..He looked at me very seriously and said he wanted an answer. This just totally confused me....I thought we agreed on waiting till I was ready. This agreement was only a couple of days ago.. We had such a loving night last night...I don't get it. It's almost as if he has forgotten. So now it stands that he thinks we are going to do it tonight. I'm not ready...I never brought up the agreement. I thought why bother. Just so you know...I'm not a prude sexually..my problem is it's only been two weeks. He wants a future together and not just looking for sex....that I know for sure. He's not a player or anything like that. I just don't know what to do????? I'm worried that since we click so well sexually, that it's going to turn into a sex relationship. We used to go for walks and talk in the early dates...but his mind has turned into sex. I guess if I just did it..he would calm down..but I refuse to do it just because someone wants me too. I feel real bad..and I do want to make love just not yet. Any suggestions welcome....
Outcast Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 Sex is like a lot of other of life's goodies; when you have it, you want more. Is there a reason that you're willing to go only so far? Because, really, you may have to quit doing everything in order to not want to do everything LOL. Seriously, though, it's an awful strong craving and men are blessed or cursed with more testosterone - the chemical of desire.
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