a4a Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 Simple, because you ladies are so cute when you're mad. I think I am sexy when I am mad..... I stomp about my trailer tossing empty home shopping network boxes about.
stoopid_guy Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 I think I am sexy when I am mad..... I stomp about my trailer tossing empty home shopping network boxes about. So that's why your hubby likes to pi$$ you off so much.
mental_traveller Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 We procrastinate because the things you nag about are inconsequential and boring.
alphamale Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 Why are guys so indecisive and procrastonate all the time. Women are just as indecisivie as men are. And I just think its human nature to procrastinate although I think men do this a bit more. The other thing I think is funny is that woman always say they want excitement and spontinaiety but their own lives are planned out in 15 minute blocks for the next 3 months.
stoopid_guy Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 The other thing I think is funny is that woman always say they want excitement and spontinaiety but their own lives are planned out in 15 minute blocks for the next 3 months. Nah, they only do that when you're trying to get together with them for a date. Heaven forbid they have to say "Thanks, but no thanks." It's all up to the individuals though. My wife might say something like "Let's go to DC (some date 3 months away.) I'll respond "let's see what the weathers like" and get accused of never wanting to "do anything." A typical conversation on a road trip: ME: Where would you like to have lunch? HER: It doesn't matter, you decide. ME: How about ABC? HER: I'm not really in the mood for that. ME: There's a DEF just ahead, how does that sound? HER: Nah, we just ate there recently. ME: So what are you in the mood for? HER: It's up to you.... <Later, at lunch...> HER: Why are you drinking so much?
a4a Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 Here is the perfect example of a man not listening to the "nagging" wife: 9:30 last night my H calls. "honey, I need you to do me a favor" (note he is in ass kissing mode) ME: Whats wrong? Him: I am over here on highway ___, can you bring the gas can here, its in the shop. ME: Yes..... give me a minute. I will be there shortly Ya see, the dumbass is driving my beater farm truck as his fuel pump died on his. So for the last 3 years I have told him that the gauge is either off or that is just the freaking way the truck is........you never ever let it go to the 1/8 of a tank line or you are dead ass outta gas. Now mind you we have driven in this truck together many times and I have "nagged": " we need gas because it is getting too low"....... him : there is a quarter tank Me: I don't care if you think it is enough I KNOW this truck. him: Why do you worry about stuff all the time? So for 3 years I have prevented us from running out of gas while driving this truck for errands and farm work......... for three years I have nagged to prevent me from having to walk to a gas station when we run out of gas in the middle of B.F. USA if in the truck together. This is why I am labeled a planner and a worrier? And a nag by most men? Because I am aware of things, know the outcome, and know the consquences of the action or non action and attempt to control them in a way that will serve both of us best? BTW I do not do it in a nasty screaming manner...... yet (many/some) men don't want to admit they are wrong even when the truck runs out of gas...... see told ya so nah nah nah nah nah...... The man would say: Well sure it ran out of gas because there are more hills on that road... and the tires need air..... if it was not for that I would have made it home I was going to punish my husband by pinning a note to him that he had to wear to work that said : MY NAME IS_______________ I ride bus #32 (the short one) And what may appear to be spontaneous is actually planned in many cases. So is it ego and pride that causes procrastination and the inability to make a decision/act in a timely manner?
Ripples Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 Not all men are laid back. I don't think CEOs get to procrastinate or postpone their jobs. Oh, I know of one that does. And he's totally disorganised, and he's got his priorites totally back to front, and he'll 'forget' anything that wasn't his idea in the first place, and he can (and will) take an hour to buy one t-shirt, and he's still making 20 times as much as me. Ok, I need to go and lie down in a cool, dark place now...
monkey00 Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 This is why I am labeled a planner and a worrier? And a nag by most men? Because I am aware of things, know the outcome, and know the consquences of the action or non action and attempt to control them in a way that will serve both of us best? there are reasons why man and woman are different such as in these ways. Yes they nag for the better and of worrisome. You can say they care too much to the point that they b*tch. The thing about men is, the more you moan about the problem the more it gets delayed. When time comes we have our way of handling the problem, or maybe not at all. So is it ego and pride that causes procrastination and the inability to make a decision/act in a timely manner? It isnt anything about ego or pride that we things the way we do. Sh*t happens or maybe we knew it was bound to happen, but in most cases we prefer to deal with the problem when the time comes. Some men think long-term problem solving, some think short-term problem solving, and some dont think at all...everyone is different.
superconductor Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 he can (and will) take an hour to buy one t-shirt... Gawd... I can do my entire wardrobe shopping for a year in less than an hour... Ok, I need to go and lie down in a cool, dark place now... *ponders* Hmmm... maybe I should set up the downstairs bedroom again...
Ripples Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 *ponders* Hmmm... maybe I should set up the downstairs bedroom again... I do stairs <cripple_with_many_talents>
a4a Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 there are reasons why man and woman are different such as in these ways. Yes they nag for the better and of worrisome. You can say they care too much to the point that they b*tch. The thing about men is, the more you moan about the problem the more it gets delayed. When time comes we have our way of handling the problem, or maybe not at all. It isnt anything about ego or pride that we things the way we do. Sh*t happens or maybe we knew it was bound to happen, but in most cases we prefer to deal with the problem when the time comes. Some men think long-term problem solving, some think short-term problem solving, and some dont think at all...everyone is different. I have to disagree I think it does have to do with ego or pride....... which leads directly to fear of failure in many cases. Men or women....... put off a decision because of the fear the decision is not a correct one..... they may fail. They do not want to look like an ass. Pride and ego. I think at times a lack of action is based on the procrastination to make a decision and act. Or the lack of action is a passive aggressive attempt to OUT DO the "nagging" spouse...... see showed her/him.......trying to tell me what to do, so I just won't do it. See I win.... I am better than him/her. Power control ego pride.
superconductor Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 The thing about nagging (or "reminding") is that it can happen so often that it just becomes background noise. More "reminders" translates into more "noise." I don't think it's about ego or pride or trying to "win" or "out-do" someone or anything of the sort. When I was married, I came to the conclusion that if I needed my SO to take care of something, the best I could do was to mention it once and only once, clearly and unequivocally. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't, nothing works 100%, but in general it worked pretty well. Mind you, she'd often bark at me, "Why didn't you remind me of such-and-such?", to which I'd respond, "I don't appreciate nagging, and I don't think you appreciate it either. You're a smart, grown woman; you know (such-and-such) needs to be done." Then she'd get all pi$$ed off at me. But I'd rather have her pi$$ed off at me with less noise in the house than have her pi$$ed off at me with a houseful of noise.
a4a Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 The thing about nagging (or "reminding") is that it can happen so often that it just becomes background noise. More "reminders" translates into more "noise." I don't think it's about ego or pride or trying to "win" or "out-do" someone or anything of the sort. When I was married, I came to the conclusion that if I needed my SO to take care of something, the best I could do was to mention it once and only once, clearly and unequivocally. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't, nothing works 100%, but in general it worked pretty well. Mind you, she'd often bark at me, "Why didn't you remind me of such-and-such?", to which I'd respond, "I don't appreciate nagging, and I don't think you appreciate it either. You're a smart, grown woman; you know (such-and-such) needs to be done." Then she'd get all pi$$ed off at me. But I'd rather have her pi$$ed off at me with less noise in the house than have her pi$$ed off at me with a houseful of noise. Ah hah..... I use this technique..... I do not actually nag, but perhaps I need to nag? I did this last night about the porch light that has been out for 3 weeks......which the H is aware of and has stated I have to change that bulb several times....(we are out of bug lights but have reg bulbs on the shelf) So after 3 weeks of darkness on the door step I said very lovingly: I want something really special for our 7 year anniversary in 2010. He says what? I would like the light bulb changed on the front porch :lmao: so my next move is to tap a flashlight to the light on a rope and let it hang there :lmao: and I could change it...... the thing is if I do what I hear then is "I would have done that I said I would".
blind_otter Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 I have to disagree I think it does have to do with ego or pride....... which leads directly to fear of failure in many cases. Men or women....... put off a decision because of the fear the decision is not a correct one..... they may fail. They do not want to look like an ass. Pride and ego. Makes sense to me. pride cometh before the fall.
blind_otter Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 Mind you, she'd often bark at me, "Why didn't you remind me of such-and-such?", to which I'd respond, "I don't appreciate nagging, and I don't think you appreciate it either. You're a smart, grown woman; you know (such-and-such) needs to be done." It's interesting to note that not all people function well with the same parameters. So, some people do need reminders. That's why personal assistants exist. Sadly, not all of us can afford a personal assistant. But it's almost always guaranteed to create conflict if you demand that others learn how to function within your parameters of what is "acceptible behavior". It's condescending to tell someone that they're an adult, so they should just know how to move through life using the tools that you, yourself, learned to use. That's ridiculous.
superconductor Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 It's interesting to note that not all people function well with the same parameters. So, some people do need reminders. That's why personal assistants exist. Sadly, not all of us can afford a personal assistant. But it's almost always guaranteed to create conflict if you demand that others learn how to function within your parameters of what is "acceptible behavior". It's condescending to tell someone that they're an adult, so they should just know how to move through life using the tools that you, yourself, learned to use. That's ridiculous. When I worked in an office and was responsible for the output of a small cluster of people, I was very fortunate in that I only had to give directions once. I was, of course, available to answer questions or provide guidance if needed, but the actual delegation went pretty smoothly (except in 1 circumstance, which is another thread entirely... won't go there now). In short, if I treated my charges with respect and as the adults they were, 99% of the time they came through without difficulty. I honestly don't see why it should be any different with a spouse or SO. It's not condescending in the least; on the contrary, it's recognizing that they are adults and can manage their own affairs without constant harping. And if they really, really need a reminder, they can do that themselves by writing a note, scribbling something on the whiteboard that's on the fridge or any other number of means.
a4a Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 It's interesting to note that not all people function well with the same parameters. So, some people do need reminders. That's why personal assistants exist. Sadly, not all of us can afford a personal assistant. But it's almost always guaranteed to create conflict if you demand that others learn how to function within your parameters of what is "acceptible behavior". It's condescending to tell someone that they're an adult, so they should just know how to move through life using the tools that you, yourself, learned to use. That's ridiculous. I think you are right BO..... funny for our wedding (which was damn near the most perfect one you could have) The H came through like a dream. I did not have to nag one time....... not once. The work to set this up was indeed unbelievable (we hosted it here at our horse farm and it was gorgeous) handmade invites, he made the 20+ tables, made our own linens, made our own food, hired a serving and bar staff, rented the biggest white tent that would fit.... and we still get compliments from people and asking us for help for their wedding. How is this possible? By that I mean how can a guy tackle a to do list in 2 months.... help make linens, iron them, do all this without me nagging one time....make decision in a split second... even pick out the damn fabric for the table linens I was impressed by him, the old him. Now cannot change a light bulb. Cannot look at the to do list he made and get one thing knocked off of it. Refusal is caused by what? Or was it his pride/ego at work there? The need to impress others? I did ask him directly ..... he says he does not know.
blind_otter Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 I honestly don't see why it should be any different with a spouse or SO. It's not condescending in the least; on the contrary, it's recognizing that they are adults and can manage their own affairs without constant harping. And if they really, really need a reminder, they can do that themselves by writing a note, scribbling something on the whiteboard that's on the fridge or any other number of means. that's rich. A relationship as a job. feck that. With a job you're compensated for the time you spend doing menial crap for other people. In a relationship, you get -- what? sex? Screw that I can do myself for free. It's only a job if you get compensated in some way for the effort you put in. Also, you get education and training for any job you do. There isn't a lot of emotional investment. IMO, anyways, unless you're a sad sad workaholic who achieves joy only from work.
a4a Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 that's rich. A relationship as a job. feck that. With a job you're compensated for the time you spend doing menial crap for other people. In a relationship, you get -- what? sex? Screw that I can do myself for free. It's only a job if you get compensated in some way for the effort you put in. Also, you get education and training for any job you do. There isn't a lot of emotional investment. IMO, anyways, unless you're a sad sad workaholic who achieves joy only from work. thanks for the thread idea.... I have to wonder if some men see marriage as a job in which they expect compensation such as sex as payment. But in that case my H is just doing volunteer work in our marriage and expects no pay :lmao:
JackJack Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 thanks for the thread idea.... I have to wonder if some men see marriage as a job in which they expect compensation such as sex as payment. This would be a good thread topic. I know of some people who are like that. they think of marriage as a job in where they get payed for their services so to speak. Really its kind of like you sctrach mine and I'll scratch yours deal though. A woman might would feel, "You give me an emotional connection, help with chores and the kids some, and as a payment I'll give you sex. A man might feel, "You give me sex, and I will help with the chores and kids etc." The problem is sometimes men/women hold out waiting for the other to hold up their end of the deal. So when the man stops connectiing emtionally, the woman stops the sex so much. To the man he sees it as, well if I get no sex she gets no help etc. Its a cycle.
a4a Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 thanks for the thread idea.... I have to wonder if some men see marriage as a job in which they expect compensation such as sex as payment. This would be a good thread topic. I know of some people who are like that. they think of marriage as a job in where they get payed for their services so to speak. Really its kind of like you sctrach mine and I'll scratch yours deal though. A woman might would feel, "You give me an emotional connection, help with chores and the kids some, and as a payment I'll give you sex. A man might feel, "You give me sex, and I will help with the chores and kids etc." The problem is sometimes men/women hold out waiting for the other to hold up their end of the deal. So when the man stops connectiing emtionally, the woman stops the sex so much. To the man he sees it as, well if I get no sex she gets no help etc. Its a cycle. why Jack start the thread then! or are you waiting for me to do it. Men.... cannot seem to iniate anything!!! don't make me nag you!
JackJack Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 why Jack start the thread then! or are you waiting for me to do it. Men.... cannot seem to iniate anything!!! don't make me nag you! tsk..I'm not sure if I want to. Let me think about it and I'll get back to you on it.
a4a Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 tsk..I'm not sure if I want to. Let me think about it and I'll get back to you on it. ahhh don't you get the hint. I am wanting you to start it. see you do this, you know it would be a good thing, you know I would enjoy it. Yet you do nothing about it. It shows how much you care about me. Your actions sure do show how much you care. I knew I should have never married you...... why do you treat me this way? You never put effort into us, you don't care what I might like. You expect me to be aware of your feelings your manly needs, what you want but you cannot even do this one little thing for me without me begging? That is love huh? yep...... sure it is....... :lmao: :lmao:
JackJack Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 ahhh don't you get the hint. I am wanting you to start it. see you do this, you know it would be a good thing, you know I would enjoy it. Yet you do nothing about it. It shows how much you care about me. Your actions sure do show how much you care. I knew I should have never married you...... why do you treat me this way? You never put effort into us, you don't care what I might like. You expect me to be aware of your feelings your manly needs, what you want but you cannot even do this one little thing for me without me begging? That is love huh? yep...... sure it is....... :lmao: :lmao: Blah woman! Do you have a fork and a tater I can borrow?
Author hotgurl Posted August 22, 2006 Author Posted August 22, 2006 Simple, because you ladies are so cute when you're mad. awww I'm even cuter when I am happy and naked.
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