Groovy Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 I met this guy who seemed nice and I'd be into him but he reminds me too much of a gay guy when he talks. My brother is gay, all his friends are gay, my neighborhood is gay and this guy talks gay. But what he says is hetrosexual and the way he thinks is hetrosexual. But I just feel if I brought him to hang out I'd be a bit embarassed that my date talked flamboyantly. People wouldn't believe he's straight. On that note I also met a guy recently who seems great, handsome and good chemistry. He also has a good job and I met his family. Well last night I found out he has received 2 DUI's and has no car. Yet I am still willing to talk to the guy who is probably an alcoholic and lose some other guy because of a voice that turns me off. Don't get on my case and call me a superficial bitch, because so many of you people are too. The whole reason of this post is to maybe see things in a way that make sense because I don't know how sound my choice of guy is and if I should be running away from the 2 DUI guy. (And the other one too)!
HokeyReligions Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 I'd run from the DUI guy. If you are sure the other guy is straight and you like him and he seems decent, go for him. The other guy has issues that could potentially harm you.
Outcast Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 Avoid DUI guy. He drinks too much and is too stupid to not drive. This is a bad sign. As for voice guy, well voice is one of the things you have to live with and if it bothers you then it bothers you. But the question is are you afraid of what others will think or is it that you actively dislike his voice? You could, of course, try to bring up gently that his vocal inflection resembles that of gay lads and see how he takes it.
alphamale Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 most females will choose the masculine male over the effeminate male any day of the week. so consider yourself normal.
amaysngrace Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 This may sound not so nice to some, but really why can't you see them both and decide once you know them each better? Maybe you're missing something about each of them because you are getting distracted. I think as long as you aren't in an exclusive relationship with either of them and they both know it, why can't you find out more before making a decision?
burning 4 revenge Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 my voice sounds like edward norton. some women have said it sounds gay and others i've asked said they never got that impression. does edward norton's voice sound gay?
alphamale Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 does edward norton's voice sound gay? a little but his acting talent makes up for it.
amaysngrace Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 does edward norton's voice sound gay? I like his voice. People call my house and when I answer they ask "Is your mom there?" I hate that I sound so young on the phone. I think I'd rather sound gay.
alphamale Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 People call my house and when I answer they ask "Is your mom there?" I hate that I sound so young on the phone. I think I'd rather sound gay. Before my voice changed I used to pick up the phone at home and callers would think I was a girl. Its sucked big time! But it changed around 13 or 14 and now I have a deep, husky, masculine voice. Girls like it.
Pyro Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 I met this guy who seemed nice and I'd be into him but he reminds me too much of a gay guy when he talks. My brother is gay, all his friends are gay, my neighborhood is gay and this guy talks gay. But what he says is hetrosexual and the way he thinks is hetrosexual. But I just feel if I brought him to hang out I'd be a bit embarassed that my date talked flamboyantly. People wouldn't believe he's straight. On that note I also met a guy recently who seems great, handsome and good chemistry. He also has a good job and I met his family. Well last night I found out he has received 2 DUI's and has no car. Yet I am still willing to talk to the guy who is probably an alcoholic and lose some other guy because of a voice that turns me off. Don't get on my case and call me a superficial bitch, because so many of you people are too. The whole reason of this post is to maybe see things in a way that make sense because I don't know how sound my choice of guy is and if I should be running away from the 2 DUI guy. (And the other one too)! You shouldn't consider either one of them. You are worried about what people will think of you if you are with a guy that sounds gay and why be with a guy that sounds like a loser and someone that you would have to drive around like you are his mom. I'd say forget them both and find someone who has his act together a little more and someone whom you would be proud of being seen together with.
norajane Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 Let's see...risk embarrasment in front of your friends or irresponsible drunk driver with no car...hmmm? Tell your friends to take a flying leap if they make fun of him, and find new friends. If it's you that doesn't like his voice, then don't date either of them.
konfuzd Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 I once dated a guy who had a stutter. I had the same fears you do, but in the end, it was what he said that mattered, and not how he said it. At first, his stutter was all I could focus on, but later on, I didn't notice it at all. I'd suggest spending more time with him as friends and see if this happens to you. Don't date the DUI guy. One time is bad enough, but to have 2 charges against him means he doesn't learn from his mistakes. He got caught twice, but most likely got away with it far too often. How would you feel bringing a guy around your friends who killed some innocent people with his idiotic actions? --end of cheese-- The alternative is to date the guy with the gay voice, and when you bring him to meet your friends tell them he used to be gay, but you're so hot you turned him straight.
Rikka Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 You like what you like and you can't help it. If you can't stand his voice, then you can't stand it. There is nothing wrong with that. I wouldn't tell him that you don't like it, I would just end the potential relationship. As for DUI guy.... he didn't learn the first time I don't think he will learn the second time (or third or fourth etc). That's a bad habit he has and it seems as though he doesn't make the most intellegent decisions. In the end, I don't think he would be good for you.
burning 4 revenge Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 You could, of course, try to bring up gently that his vocal inflection resembles that of gay lads and see how he takes it. Ireland, right? You don't have to answer.
Author Groovy Posted August 21, 2006 Author Posted August 21, 2006 What's weird is my ex was a scorpio who liked to surf and was a young widow and a teacher. This guy with the out of place voice is a scorpio who likes to surf and is a young widow and a teacher. I'm going to talk to the guy with 2 DUI's. He really likes me and ignoring him won't make him leave. I want to know when it happened. What he plans to do to prevent it again and how much he drinks. It's definitely a red flag. And I will hang out with the gay voice guy and see if I can get into him anyway. He otherwise seems pretty cool. But like someone said people are attracted to things and they can't alway control what turns them on or off.
Adunaphel Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 What's weird is my ex was a scorpio who liked to surf and was a young widow and a teacher. This guy with the out of place voice is a scorpio who likes to surf and is a young widow and a teacher. Coincidences happen more often that one might believe, and coincidences is all they are. Good luck with the gay voice guy, I hope that in case you decide you are not compatible it is not related to his voice. I apologize if this will sound stupid, but I was wondering, since your brother is gay and so are a lot of people you have known since a long time, could it be that you find his voice a turn of because...well, he reminds you of your brother or of some friend? I would be unconfortable dating a guy whose voice reminded me that of a close relative or of a neighbour that I've known all my life. It would surely sound weird to me. Perhaps it could be your case, as well? I'd avoid dating the other guy too. Good luck with your talk. If you are not interested, I hope you manage to deliver that message.
blind_otter Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 I dunno man. I like men with southern accents and deep voices. It's a personal preference. WTF, people are supposed to date other people even if they don't match up to your personal preference?
norajane Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 WTF, people are supposed to date other people even if they don't match up to your personal preference? Nope. But she is asking us what WE think, so I'm guessing it's less to do with her preference and more to do with being embarrassed in front of her friends. In which case, she should definitely not date him.
Author Groovy Posted August 21, 2006 Author Posted August 21, 2006 If I didn't have a gay brother and live in a gay neighborhood maybe I wouldn't even notice. He grew up in San Fran so maybe he learned a bad way of pronounciation? It's not so much I care what others think as much as it is just the quality itself that turns me off. I'm 90% sure they are both not for me, as usual.
burning 4 revenge Posted August 21, 2006 Posted August 21, 2006 I dunno man. I like men with southern accents and deep voices. It's a personal preference. WTF, people are supposed to date other people even if they don't match up to your personal preference? Sometimes. I'm turned on by girls who speak in broken English with Spanish accents. That and girls who speak elegant English with a hint of a Scots dialect. That doesn't mean I would only be open to dating only people who fall into those categories, that would be idiotic.
Outcast Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 WTF, people are supposed to date other people even if they don't match up to your personal preference? Well, sometimes people who don't fit the predesigned mold manage to grow on you anyway. Had I stuck to the 'type' I thought was 'my' type when I was a teenager, I would've missed out on some decent folks. So I threw out the mold long ago.
nicki Posted August 22, 2006 Posted August 22, 2006 I know what mean about the feminine/gay sounding voice thing. For whatever reason, it is a turn-off. I like masculine voices. Love the way they sound. I've had boyfriends and a husband with higher voices....and I much prefer a lower octave voice. I wouldn't dismiss a guy because of a higher voice, but if I felt turned off by it, then I would not pursue a relationship. Sexual attraction encompasses many things, sound included. Nothing wrong with that. I would imagine some men hate high-pitched little girl voices, or whiney ones. I know those kind of voices make my teeth hurt. Voice is important to guys, too. My boyfriend gave me the nicest compliment. He said the just sound of my voice gives him an erection. And his voice elicits a a similar female response out of me. So, it's up to you to decide what is attractive to you, and how much one quality means to you....besides, are you worried that he may be a closet gay guy? I'd probably worry about that, even if it is unfounded.
Recommended Posts