visotech Posted August 18, 2006 Posted August 18, 2006 I am on the westcoast she is on the eastcoast thats a 3 hr time difference. I work an 8hr day and she just started college agian, between work/school our schedules just dont fit. I get off work looking forward to a call but she is out to dinner, she gets back from dinner and I am out with my friends by then. Talking before bed never works out since she sleeps 3 hrs earlyer then I would ever even touch my bed. Does long distance ever work right through timezones? I have done it before without the timezone block and it all worked out well...it just seems to much trouble in this situation. If you search on the forums I've sat here and wrote posts telling people to follow their hearts and they can make LDRs work - why can't I seem to follow my own advice?
Outcast Posted August 18, 2006 Posted August 18, 2006 Well, if you'd rather be out with your friends every time you could be talking to her, you've made your choice about what's more important to her. I'm not saying you should sit home every night, but you could arrange phone 'dates' a couple times a week. If she were in your town, you'd be going out with her a couple or so times a week when you wouldn't be seeing your friends, right?
cld24 Posted August 18, 2006 Posted August 18, 2006 I'm also experiencing the same time difference as you are. I am on the east coast and my boyf is west coast. We don't have trouble at all talking. You just have to both make time and sacrifices sometimes. I call him as soon as I wake up which is around 7am his time because he's already at work. He works 10hr days and I work a few hours a day but we call each other throughout the day even if its just a 1 min call to say hey and we also text sweet things if we can't call while working. We both call each other as soon as we're off work too. If I'm going out to dinner I will call him to let him know when I'll be home and I try to meet up with friends early so that I can be back home by 11pm (his 8pm) so we will have at least 3 hours to talk that night. Even on weekends when we go out with friends we call each other a lot just to say wish u were here and see how the others night is going. I feel very lucky with him because our communication is great. I've had bad communication in previous relationships and we were in the same time zone. As with the talking before bed why don't you ask her to call you before she goes to bed? Another thing that works for us is we talk online and use our webcams too. Good luck with your relationship..it can work!
Alexandra-Girl Posted August 18, 2006 Posted August 18, 2006 Hi there. I have been the woman in your situation. Yes the time zone change is difficult but it can be overcome. You two need to conform to one schedule. It doesn't have to be strictly 7 am every night etc... it can easily be a 7 am on monday's, a 3 pm on tuesday's, a 5, 6, 9 here and there. Additionally, work out how often you two want to talk. Does it have to be every day or every second day. Once the logistics is setup between you two - there is no problems. If something needs to change you will find out as you go along and just change the time. Pretty soon you will find that you don't even recognize the time zone difference. LDR's with a large amount of distance (time zones) work well if you work out the logistic's of it all before she leaves. Try strict times for a month and then decide at the end of the month what works best and what needs to change. You can do it! I am a living witness to it's success. Alex
leopardprint Posted August 18, 2006 Posted August 18, 2006 It can work. My last S.O. (now ex) and I were in an LDR for two years - he was in Arizona and I was in NYC. It was a 3hr difference during one half of the year, and a 2hr difference during the second half (day light savings times no my end of the country). We didn't break up because of communicating or the distance or time zone, it was for different reasons. Anyways, what we did, was make specific times for one another. Like, during my breaks at school or lunch, he was driving to work, or something, so we'd take that 15mins during our day to speak to one another. Then, when he was on break from work, he would call me, and I'd run to the bathroom during class to talk to him for 5 minutes (he was working full time and I was going to college full time). At night, no matter how tired I was, I always made time to wait for him, and talk to him, for atleast an hour every night (it was usually more like 3hours) either by phone, or by being on the phone WHILE being on the webcam at the same time so we could see each other. And I know this is going to sound so incredibly dumb, and I've always never told anyone this but... At night, we would leave our phones on speaker phone, and leave them on our pillows next to us, and fall asleep together. We would fall asleep talking to one another, and wake up talking to one another. It just helped us feel closer to one another, and it helped us feel like we were still apart of each other's daily lives, even though we were miles apart. P.S., We had In-Network calling on our Verizon Wireless cell phone services, so we didn't pay a single dime for ANY time on the phone with one another. So unless you have the same type of deal, I wouldn't recommend the sleeping on the phone thing unless you've gots LOTS of cash.
Guest Posted August 18, 2006 Posted August 18, 2006 Does long distance ever work right through timezones? Sure it can. You just need to be dedicated. You think a 3 hour difference is bad - try a 10 hour difference *plus* an International Dateline to conquer. :/ (Me = the eastern US, him = Australia) :/
sao2 Posted August 18, 2006 Posted August 18, 2006 Right now my gf and I are doing a 6hr time zone difference. We definitely do the "Date" idea. We decide on a set time that we will talk to each other. This helps because 1) it gives us something to look forward to. 2) If something comes up we can plan to make the phone call happen.
Kelebek Posted August 18, 2006 Posted August 18, 2006 I'm doing a two hour difference, and it actually works out quite well. He finishes work at midnight, and that's only 10pm for me, so we usually chat for about 2 hours and neither of us are tired. I'm not back at university yet after the summer, so whenever he has a break, I can be available. If one of us sees our friends, obviously the nightly chat is out the window but we still try to do that at least three times a week. I hate feeling like a recluse so I love going and being with my friends, but then I end up missing him, lol. The difference actually WORKS for us, I thought that just today even before I read this post. We seem to always be free at the same time! Only 7 days til I'm with him, yay! Now...a ten hour difference like the post before me...ouch!!! That must be tough, I admire you!!!
DreamDragon Posted August 25, 2006 Posted August 25, 2006 haha, i would kill for just a 3 hour difference! and same country too. like the guest couple posts above said, i'm in a similar situation. I live in Australia, and him on the Inner West part of the USA. And hell yes it so can work! You just need you priorities set. Your partner or your friends? I myself have it a tad easy in the friends here department, don't go out with them much, and would prefer spending time talking to my sweetie who is like a best friend to me also, over hanging out with my 'friends'. But yeh, a lot of people have made great suggestions and such, don't feel there's much to add Good luck!
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