john2776 Posted August 16, 2006 Posted August 16, 2006 My GF had a trial for a new job on Monday, and was told afterwards that she would start work full time on Thursday. But yesterday the boss called her and as we were near her work she dropped in and said hello to see what was going on. It turned out that he wasn't going to hire her yet and didn't need her yet. We then went shopping and I said to my GF how I wasn't impressed with him wasting her time. She wondered if she would get paid for the time she had already worked. I said that if she doesn't get the money now I doubt she ever will. When we finished shopping I asked her if she wanted to get the money or not. She said yes, and I asked her again - are you sure? So I walked with her to the place and stood next to her when she asked to be paid. The boss said "No, we don't pay people for doing trial work." My GF said "oh ok" and turned to leave. I then said to him "Excuse me, but she doesn't work for free. She has done work for you and you now owe her money." After him telling me he doesn't pay for trials a couple more times I got angry with him and explained where I was coming from again, and when he eventually walked away from the conversation/argument I called him an idiot. This is where the problem starts for me. As we are walking away my GF drops behind and says "No, this isn't right either - and wanted to go back!". I convinced her not to go back but now I was not only fuming about this boss not paying her but that she had somehow taken his side over the situation. When I got home I decided to go for a walk to cool off before discussing it further. After more than an hour I could not see it any other way than that she had totally disrespected me by supporting the boss. But I went back to our place and talked to her to see what she would say. Her point of view was that she could not see how I could possibly be angry at her, because the only person who had done anything wrong was me. I simply could not believe it. I'll cut most of the rest out, except that while I was away the boss phoned her and apologised and said that he would now pay her the money! But my GF was still of the opinion that me arguing with him did no good and was not correct, and that she supported the way he behaved and not the way that I did. WTF! Her viewpoint basically stems from being a christian and that as a christian if my enemy slaps my face, I should turn my face so he can slap my other one, just like Jesus says. I can't see how its right to let people walk all over us. Am I being unreasable to have expected her to have been more supportive of my actions in supporting her claim to what was rightfully hers? Its not like I became physically agressive, I called him an idiot.
bluechocolate Posted August 16, 2006 Posted August 16, 2006 Firstly, I don't know where you live but it is highly likely that this guy is doing something illegal. I've heard of this kind of thing before - we'll trial you for a day & then decide. I'm pretty sure that means they still have to pay. Secondly, I understand why you might feel this way but she did not totally disrespect you. She didn't like you getting angry & calling this guy an idiot, which is fair enough. You can fight for what is rightfully hers without resorting to anger or name calling (like knowing legally where she stands & citing the relevant labour law). Better still, when it comes to her employment you should let her fight her own battles.
Tony T Posted August 17, 2006 Posted August 17, 2006 Your girlfriend's employment and interaction with persons or companies that have to do with her employment are none of your concern or business. If she's not old enough to take care of herself, you may be committing a crime by being with her. You simply had no business interacting at all with her boss or saying the things you did. If you, even as a friend, stuck your nose in my business that way you would have to buy some new teeth. Your girlfriend has an absolute right to her privacy and an absolute right to be angry at you for what you did. She invited you to go with her and stand by her but not to negotiate for her in a manner that would be embarassing for her and most likely end all possibilities of employment at that company for her. Companies don't like to hire women whose boyfriends will barge into their offices the way you did. I am astounded that she didn't break up with you over that incident. If somebody embarassed me like that, it would be all over. Try to restrict your temper and your comments to matters of direct concern to you...and give support directly to others in their trials and tribulations without interfering in their lives and situations.
Author john2776 Posted August 18, 2006 Author Posted August 18, 2006 Just for the record - I was wrong. Oooh I hate being wrong. Apologised big time to my fiancee last night. All is good at home again. Thanks for your harsh words.
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