Guest Posted August 16, 2006 Posted August 16, 2006 Allo everyone! This is a long distance relationship but the problem isn't in the distance so I'm posting it here. Thanks in advance for those who have the patience to read this.. I'm going to try to keep my rant as concise as possible. Here's the history to my problem: A while ago, I met a guy on a vacation and spent a fiery hormone filled week with him until he had to go back to the UK. After he returned home, we decided to keep things going with a long distance relationship until he could come back to visit later this year. We've had 2 months of sweet emails, phone sex, and mutual adoration and then things started to f**k up. The thing is... I have DIVINE TECH POWERS. No exaggeration. There is no problem involving electronics that I cannot solve. While this was initially fun because men are very impressed, my boyfriend soon realised that he now has not just a girlfriend, but free tech support with breasts. For about 45 days I kept solving his problems, enjoying the fact that he needed me. I'd joke that he only stayed with me for the free IT help (but now it's not so funny :'[ ) I'll try to put this in anecdote form: 3 days ago, he was sitting in bed, late at night, chatting over MSN and he says.. "I wish you were here with me right now ..... (i start to smile) ... I really need help setting up the e-mail on my palm pilot" !!! Last weekend after (cough)phonesex(cough), literally just MILLISECONDS after the big O, my boy moans satisfiedly, pauses and says "Explain Windows System Registry to me" A month ago, he used to say things like "How have I been so lucky? I'm so glad I met you, you're the best things in my life, you make me smile" A week ago it was "I'm so glad I met you..My life wouldn't be the same without you.. You taught me how to download Torrents" This wasn't TOO bad until last night he comes online the conversation goes him: YEEEEESSSSSS!!! you're online!! me: I love the enthusiasm! Him: I broke the screen on my palm pilot!! what do i do? So, I pretend i'm not feeling overlooked and unloved and I give him the advice that i've given him 20 times already and he SNAPS at me and says 'I TOLD YOU I DONT HAVE THE SOFTWARE'. Then i explained to him where he went wrong and he said 'oh' and continued ranting about his problems without apologising. At this point, I'm starting to feel more like an outsourced IT employee than a long distance girlfriend. Here's my question: How do I get him to stop blurring the lines between tech help and gf without him getting all defensive. I know it isn't me (I know this is going to sound stupid but I want to get all the facts in) I'm tall, curvy and have a pretty face and I know he used to be insanely attracted to me. Everytime he knows i'm bothered about something he INSTANTLY gets upset and runs away as if it's my fault. I want to know how to get the point across to his big childish brain without corroding the relationship. When he gets upset he says things he doesn't mean and I always take it seriously. I'm sick of being the only adult in our relationship! He's 34 and i'm 19 years old. wtf.
bluechocolate Posted August 16, 2006 Posted August 16, 2006 How do I get him to stop blurring the lines between tech help and gf without him getting all defensive. Somehow I think it is you who has blurred those lines. Along with the lines between a holiday romance & real life. .....I'm starting to feel more like an outsourced IT employee than a long distance girlfriend. Have you tried telling him that? How about just not helping him & see how it goes? Tell him you're taking an IT break for 2 weeks.
lovelorcet Posted August 16, 2006 Posted August 16, 2006 Here's the history to my problem: A while ago, I met a guy on a vacation and spent a fiery hormone filled week with him until he had to go back to the UK. After he returned home, we decided to keep things going with a long distance relationship until he could come back to visit later this year. We've had 2 months of sweet emails, phone sex, and mutual adoration and then things started to f**k up. He's 34 and i'm 19 years old. wtf. Problem number one and problem number two right there. You are young and you are his toy. I don't know where to start when trying to explain to you the problems in this type of relationship. In the long run tech support will be the least of your problems I fear.... Is this what you really want?
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