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playing around or shy?


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Posted

My crush and I have been pretty close over the past couple of weeks and he even asked me out for dinner, I think, after he said that he said he was just joking. Anyway, we both told each other that we find each other pretty darn attractive, this happened a couple of days ago, I picked up the flirting a little bit after he said this but he hasn't ask me out yet. What are the chances he will? Is he just being shy or is he just not interested? I made a comment about seeing how I can get a raise in my score(grading attractiveness) and he just said he would have to think about it. Nothing since this exchange. What do you guys think....not interested, just playing around, or shy?

Posted
My crush and I have been pretty close over the past couple of weeks and he even asked me out for dinner, I think, after he said that he said he was just joking. Anyway, we both told each other that we find each other pretty darn attractive, this happened a couple of days ago, I picked up the flirting a little bit after he said this but he hasn't ask me out yet. What are the chances he will? Is he just being shy or is he just not interested? I made a comment about seeing how I can get a raise in my score(grading attractiveness) and he just said he would have to think about it. Nothing since this exchange. What do you guys think....not interested, just playing around, or shy?

 

Absolutely no idea. Sorry.

 

In what context were you discussing your score (presumably you mean getting marked out of ten for your looks) with him? Has he been grading you on that?

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Posted

We work together and I asked about lunch one day and we ended up order takeout and then I asked him if he's paying and he said yeah. well some other people also ordered and I emailed him to ask he payed this guy and he said yeah, and during this message I told him his score. He sent a message out and wanted people to grade him. I told him he tells me my score I will tell him his. He replied back.......asked first. So I sent him an email thanking him for lunch and included the his grade. He read the email but didn't reply back with my grade until late the next day. He gave me the same grade except he would have to think about me being cool, coz I told him he was cool as well as pretty attractive. He was playing around at that point. I sent him a reply and asked him any extra credit to get my grade up? and he replied he would have to think about that. I made light of it and told him he was no fun. He didn't reply after that. Hope this will help. thanks

Posted
He gave me the same grade except he would have to think about me being cool, coz I told him he was cool as well as pretty attractive. He was playing around at that point. I sent him a reply and asked him any extra credit to get my grade up? and he replied he would have to think about that. I made light of it and told him he was no fun. He didn't reply after that. Hope this will help. thanks

 

I see.

 

You've told him you think he's cool and attractive, and he responded by saying he'd have to "think about" whether you're cool. It's time to leave him in no doubt about that. "Cool" is generally about being posed and confident. Reaching a state where you appreciate other people's approval, but don't depend on it. Some people project an ultra cool image (what you might call charisma), but most are just dotting between states of coolness and uncoolness, depending on their circumstances

 

You don't sound as if you have huge amounts of confidence right now, so it's maybe time to start building on that. Please don't ask him for any more advice on how to increase your attractiveness score, as that will make you look insecure - even if you ask in a joking manner. As he didn't reply to your last email, it's time to focus on other matters in the work place. I'm not suggesting that you ignore him...but for goodness sake don't start chasing him or finding all sorts of reasons to spend time around him.

 

You can let him know in the usual ways (the occasional eye contact and cheeky grin) that you're still interested, but it's also important for you to be able to move on quickly and stop giving out the flirty signals if that interest isn't getting reciprocated

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