bf broke up with me now with my best mate

[sexyLMC]

what can i say well we've been together for just over one year. and we broke up.. just suddenly in the pub he said he didnt want this anymore.. not alot i could say..

but now hes always with my best mate ive asked her if theres anything going on but she just says no. i never see her anymore there always together.. sleeping at there mates houses together..

i feel so hurt.. i was talkin to him until the other day i desided the nc rule.. but im hurting so much i feel so depressed its un true.. i wish i could just i duno just not be here with my life anymore.. some one help me i cant go on like this..

lisa x

[bluechocolate]

You need to evaluate if this 'mate' deserves the title of 'best'.

[Returning]

bluechocolate makes a valid point.

 

Your alledged friend obviously wanted your man and he wanted her, you've been betrayed by two important people in your life. I've had a similar situation and went through all sorts of plots and plans in my head for revenge but at the end of the day, are these people worth the space in your head?

 

There are better friends out there and plenty more fish in the sea. Hope you feel better soon, cherish your life, it's a beautiful gift and you're a beautiful person. Try getting into some physical exercise, see if there is a Muay Thia Boxing school in your area, I would recommend it, it helps.

 

tc x

[sexyLMC]

aww returning.. thank you so much..

just reading what you have replied made me think abit in my head..

i think im more jelous then anything..

boxing well that might be my thing i supose..lol

but one thing i feel as if i want to be left alone by everyone..

just stay in for a few days but some people say this may make me worse..

do you think so?

x

[Returning]

Muay Thia Boxing is like a martial art but you can pick it up a lot quicker than say karate kata's or other arts. However, the work out is very demanding but damn good for you, clears the mind and boosts the self confidence. While training you don't do any full contact work (actually hitting each other) but use pads and guards to prevent hurt or injury. I took it up because I needed to do something but running or weight training, gym work, didn't appeal and swimming didn't have the desired effect. Half of the people in my school are female and many of them professionals, teachers, a vet etc who just like the workout for fitness and wellness.

 

Being alone and staying in may not be a good idea, try and get out and do something but it would be best to avoid the people and places that would trigger thoughts of the people involved in your circumstance. Try not to talk about it or get caught up in any emotional cross-fire, all that is beneath you. Have you any art gallaries, events or festivals near you that you could visit?

 

x

[sexyLMC]

not really..lol i live in like a well quite area sort of thing.. but im sure ill find something to get up to..

ive got lots of work on at the moment aswel which helps things get along..

but one thing though..

every now and then i pick up the phone to go to call him, ive been stopping myself but i was just wondering how most other people sort of not phone there ex to talk and stuff?

xxx thnxs for helpin me xxx

[bluechocolate]

....but i was just wondering how most other people sort of not phone their ex to talk and stuff?

 

Key word there - ex.

 

It's hard because you've had the habit of talking to each other, being able to pick up the phone & stuff, but that was when you were together.

 

Keep stopping yourself, I think that is the right thing to do for now.

[Returning]

I agree with bluechocolate

 

When you think of 'Him' you must immediately replace the thought with a reality check. Something like 'He doesn't matter anymore, I'm doing something else' or whatever statement you can come up with that suits. It will only get better with time.

 

You can use this board to vent (ramble on) it is a good thing to use because it stops you doing it to your friends and family and no one here will hold it against you. An outlet to dump the stuff in your head.

 

If you like to use the phone, phone people who you dont often talk to and don't talk about your break up, ask them how they are doing etc. I'm sure you have older family members who would be made up to hear from you.

 

If you live in a small community you may need to be mature about the whole thing and prove you are a bigger/better person than the two who have treated your friendship so cheaply. The last thing you want is to become some kind of soap opera character for the people with nothing better to talk about.

 

x

[sexyLMC]

i know.. its just so hard you know.. hes taken everything away from me.. all the friends i have are his friends aswel.. hes taken my best friend..

i feel so gutted.. ive got so much going on in my lfie right now.. i hate to fee lsorry for myself but i cant even see a light at the end of the tunnel at the moment..

i just want to sit and cry..but the family who i have got i dont want them to see me like this..

last week i got sacked from my full time job which i think makes it worse cause im sitting in al lday doing nothin.. theres nothing i can do anymore cause everything costs money..

im driving myself mad.. i feel so so so hurt its unbelieveable..

i just wish this wasnt my life you know..

i bet i sound so sad to you guys but if i had a wish right now.. id wish not to be me anymore..

[Returning]

hey sexyLMC,

 

I read all your other posts to see where you are coming from. You are a bright, intelligent young woman. You have allowed this guy to use you for whatever reason. Let it stop here. I take it the guy is a similar age to you, maybe dabbles with drugs. Whatever...guy's this age are just one throbing gland with nothing between the ears, their prime directive is to do the what comes naturaly. You are a better person than that. Your body is a temple, only share it with someone who respects and cherishes you. If you don't respect yourself how is anybody else going to respect you?

 

How is your education? What do you want from your life? The answers to these two questions are much more important than this guy. You can do, and be, whatever you want, really, believe me. You have time and health on your side. Stop thinking about him and start thinking about you.

 

You could be a PA to an international model and travel the world on £35,000 a year if you wanted too, while he was still driving a van for £12,000 or working on a farm for £8,000. Thing is, you would have your pick of fellers if you wanted one.

 

Look to yourself, find out in your wildest dreams what you want from your life and go for it girl...you'd be silly not too. You have the brains, you can have whatever body you want, do it.

 

And btw, clocked your posts over losing weight, I have lost 32lb, 2 stone, in 8 weeks. I did this by going regular to muay thai boxing classes twice a week and cutting out bread, cakes and biscuits.

 

You could be a big fish on an international scale while he will still be stinky billy bent dick in a small pond.

 

Find what you want, find what qualifications/experience you need, then go and do it. Life is for living and you only get one, look down at your feet, don't know what size they are but that is the only space you will occupy on this whole wide world for your entire life.

 

Most of all, find yourself, love yourself and love life.

 

x

[sexyLMC]

hiyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa..lol

sorry im feeling gd today.. im just going to go on for a bit now just explain something..

me and my boyfriend split up not long ago were talkin weeks here..

as far as i knew him and my best friend was getting together.. after ringing up my best friend and shoutign at her in a voice mail then ignoring her.. i felt really bad cause its not the osrt of thing i do.. i spoek to her today and she told me the truth..

i feel such a prick..

they was really good friends then on saturday night he tried to get with her and she turned him down sicne me and her are such good mates..

he was flirting with her this whole time..

Anyway today he was coming up to my place to collect his things and i just put them in the car and asked how he was then let him know i know theres nothin going on between them to..

I also out of no where told him really not to bother ringing me anymore cause i have no time for him.. really guys i dont no where all this strength came from to let the man who i thought id love forever walk out of my life.. well actually i gave him abit of a push..

When i left him he sat in the car practically in tears..

i cant believe i got so upset over a guy..

theres so many people everyday goign through break ups and theres no point in wasting your life on it..

i feel amazing....

Thanks to every1 who has helped me.. i feel so stronge in myself..

And just to let you know.. ive now desided to go into nurseing to the last post..lol

thanks guys so much..

lv u loadssssss xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[sexyLMC]

lol.. sorry returning..

i do abit of modeling myself so i wouldnt have to be someones P.A. but thanks anyway xxx

[AtLongLast]

Don't believe her just because she told you. Argh. I am having this problem and I don't believe a word of it. Too much evidence to support the truth over their lies. THIS is why I don't have best friends and right now have no need for a boyfriend. If that is what life and love is like (because I loved her too--my "best" friend) then I don't want any part of it.

 

I will keep looking, I don't give up --although I am much more savvy when it comes to who I associate with on any level.

 

Do your thing, ignore him. And be careful of her. She just may not be telling the WHOLE truth.

 

I am proud of you that you don't want contact with him though. Keep that up. I haven't gotten so far as to tell my ex to **** of yet. I am getting there though. The mind games have all but driven me mad.

[sexyLMC]

i know.. but when he came up about 2hours ago to get his stuff he even admitted it..

i dont care i just texted him telling hi mto get out of my life for gd.. hes such a head mess its un true..

i think im better off out of it anyways..

xxx

[Returning]

There's plenty more fish in the sea sexyLMC, good luck with the nursing or the modeling, whichever you choose.

[sexyLMC]

thank you..

xxx