ThumbingMyWay Posted August 11, 2006 Posted August 11, 2006 FREE WILL after being on LS for 2 years, going thru my wifes affair, getting my faith in God back in line and just being more “aware” of interpersonal relationships in my everyday life. I cant help but wonder…..why do we put ourselves thru so much emotional torment and harbor all this baggage? I read thread after thread of people who start affairs, live for the moment…BUT on the inside they are dying with unwanted emotional torment for there actions…they feel lost and not in control…AND THEY KEEP DOING IT!!!! I have been thinking about this a lot….this FREE WILL God gave us. If all he wanted was for us to be truthful and loving and faithful….they why the *** did he give us this free will? I think we as humans just don’t get it. We do things that make our body feel good, but don’t look at the whole picture….we live for the moment regardless of consequences. WHY? Why is it so hard for people to live a life of truth and integrity? Don’t get me wrong, I sin and have very bad thoughts in my head (mostly lust)….I struggle every day to do the right things….the things that my conscience, my inner counselor directs me to do. But dam this FREE WILL….it works on me, on you, on every human. Its calling us to be selfish, to do whats right for the body and NOT for the soul. WHY is it so hard for humans to walk a straight path and turn away from the dark things in life? why…because God gave us this thing called FREE WILL. its almost like a test to see if we can handle it…..and I got to say….NO ONE can handle it……we take care of SELF first…..when it should be Truth first…. OK….so am I any different than others? I am beginning to think I am. My conscience has such a strong hold on me….I don’t think I could ever put my self wants above God, my wife, my kids or my family. How did I get this way? Why do I feel like I am in the minority in my actions, thought and behaviour? I was out golfing with my boss and some of his friends. The 2 friends are mid-40 divorced males. After the round, we had a drink at the bar and they chatted with some married women. I just cant believe what these men think, say and do….its like they are just teenagers talking trash like highschool days…. I dunno….just don’t get this thing called life sometimes…..God gave me a soul and a conscience and I feel like I am the only one who resists this free will thingy…..and its aggravating sometimes to see humans in such predicaments made on their own regard….then we ask why is this happening to me? and we blame God……maybe we should blame him…he gaves us the free will in the first place. But isn’t that the crux? he gives us the rules he wants us to live by…..knowing dam well our free will wont allow it? enter Jesus to save mankind from our free will…..and I truly do thank him….I don’t ever want to be on the otherside….my witness of pain and angony will not allow me to wander……so my life path may be boring to self….but at least I have the Truth in me.
Outcast Posted August 12, 2006 Posted August 12, 2006 I have been thinking about this a lot….this FREE WILL God gave us. If all he wanted was for us to be truthful and loving and faithful….they why the *** did he give us this free will? He hoped we'd use it for good. I think we as humans just don’t get it. We do things that make our body feel good, but don’t look at the whole picture….we live for the moment regardless of consequences. WHY? 'Delayed gratification'. Some people can manage it; others can't. Why is it so hard for people to live a life of truth and integrity? Don’t get me wrong, I sin and have very bad thoughts in my head (mostly lust)….I struggle every day to do the right things….the things that my conscience, my inner counselor directs me to do. Well, you're allowed to lust - but better so if you do so for your own partner. But dam this FREE WILL….it works on me, on you, on every human. Its calling us to be selfish, to do whats right for the body and NOT for the soul. That's not free will's fault. It's what you do with free will. What Bill Gates did was decide to give billions away to the poor. WHY is it so hard for humans to walk a straight path and turn away from the dark things in life? Greed. When desire battles will, desire often wins. why…because God gave us this thing called FREE WILL. its almost like a test to see if we can handle it…..and I got to say….NO ONE can handle it……we take care of SELF first…..when it should be Truth first…. Well, we are animals. Our first instinct is to survive - so sometimes we do that by taking care of ourselves first. But it's not true that everybody fails. OK….so am I any different than others? I am beginning to think I am. My conscience has such a strong hold on me….I don’t think I could ever put my self wants above God, my wife, my kids or my family. Some people do when they are sane and rational. Others think that way, but something will happen to push them over the edge and they do things they never thought they'd do. How did I get this way? Why do I feel like I am in the minority in my actions, thought and behaviour? Sometimes it's a factor of who you associate with. I've felt like you sometimes but I've also met quite a few people who share the same values. I just cant believe what these men think, say and do….its like they are just teenagers talking trash like highschool days…. Some people never grow up emotionally. I dunno….just don’t get this thing called life sometimes…..God gave me a soul and a conscience and I feel like I am the only one who resists this free will thingy…..and its aggravating sometimes to see humans in such predicaments made on their own regard….then we ask why is this happening to me? and we blame God……maybe we should blame him…he gaves us the free will in the first place. Well. Some people have issues. Choose unproductive coping methods to help them with their issues. Sometimes they bury their pain in food or booze or drugs - or another person. Some are indeed just selfish. But isn’t that the crux? he gives us the rules he wants us to live by…..knowing dam well our free will wont allow it? It's not that our free will won't allow it. It's that we don't have discipline.
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