richardcruz Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 Please read my last thread if you are not familiar with my story. Anyways, My ex dumped me and for the first few months I begged her to come back. I called her repeadetly, txt, emailed her, cried my eyes out, etc. Of course none of it really worked. After a while, I finnaly accepted that she did not want to talk to me and that I was initiating all the contact. Its been about a month and two weeks that I have been NC and have not heard from her in any way, shape, or form. I seriously doubt that I will ever hear from her again. The urge to pick up the phone and dial her number has gone away now. I understand that calling her won't change anything. The only thing that I have now is a growing resentment towards her. When she asked for "space" and I would contact her, she would tell me things like "you ruin my life" and " I would rather forget about everything that happended between us" and "do you want me to tell you off?" Keep in mind that we are both in our mid to late 20's and were seriously involved w each other for one and half years. We also lived together. If found out as soon as she asked for space and moved out that she was seeing someone. I cannot begin to explain to you how much the things she said to me have deeply hurt me and still does till this day. Its like every morning when i'm in the shower (which is when I think of alot of things) and throughout the day, I keep on replaying what she said to me and I keep on asking myself how she could have told me that. How did she go from telling me that we were soulmates to this? All of this despite everything we had been through and everything I had done for her. Like I said she doesn't call me but I keep asking myself the same thing over and over and I feel as if I have no heart anymore because she destroyed it. I feel as if I will never love anyone with the same innocence as I did. I trusted her with all my heart and she hurt me like no one else has. Words are meaningless now because I have learned that only time will tell if someone truly loves you. The words "I L*ve You" are empty and pointless now. How do I get my heart back? How can I stop asking myself how she could have done this to me? Thanks for your time.
MrPot Posted August 10, 2006 Posted August 10, 2006 First of all, you should, and will soon, be glad that this biotch broke ties with you. Could you imagine spending your life with someone so heartless? And to answer your question, all you need to do is find someone else who revs your engine like she did. You will; you're still in your twenties. Just take your lessons from this and move on. Lesson #1: You are not a whiny bitch. You spent months acting like one after she broke up with you. When someone breaks up with you, the best thing you can do is ALWAYS agree and act like it was your idea in the first place. Behaving in any other way is counterproductive. Remember to never, ever, be that spineless wimp again, and your future relationships will prosper. You probably lost her in the first place because you became an anti-challenge. You became a weak sponge after becoming too secure in a relationship. Remember in the future: you can't love someone you don't respect. And your woman didn't respect you anymore. A woman (and a man) must know that you're able to leave them and live without them. If they think they can keep you and control you no matter what, goodbye challenge; goodbye mystery; goodbye attraction. Goodbye relationship.
Author richardcruz Posted August 10, 2006 Author Posted August 10, 2006 Thanks for your response Pot. I wish would have had more self-respect for myself when this first happended. That way I wouldnt feel like a complete floormat. Believe me I learned my lesson and wil never allow myself to be disrespected in this manner by anyone again. I know the things that she told me were really fu**ed up but I guess at the time I didn't realize it. But now as time passes, I am seeing things alot differently. Also when I have told my close group of friends what she said, the look at me in disbelief and tell me that they can't believe she had the nerve to tell me those things. So now, my friends comments along with my new perspective of viewing things now makes me really burn inside. I now fully understand how heartless the comments were that she made towards me and what she did to me, and it hurts now more that ever. I don't want to talk to her, I don't want an explanation from her, I just want the pain to stop. I cant stop asking myself how she could have treated me like this. I know time heals all but is there a faster way? Keep the comments coming.
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