KittenMoon Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 Note: This post should be read as more sardonic than self-loathing... After a weekend of hearing about my little bro planning to move in with his gf (of 5ish years) when they go to grad school together, and his plans on getting his phD, I now get another knife in the gut: My oldest friend (since 5th grade) got engaged over the weekend. Why does this hurt so much? Because both of these people, as well as many other close friends of mine, are in their first serious relationships. All of these people are planning marriage (or are married). They all seem happy. I could have been in the same place as all of them... but for my stupid fears and doubts. (about my first serious relationship) I am throughly annoyed at myself... and everyone else... right now. Seriously, why does it seem like EVERYONE I KNOW has decided to get married/engaged etc right after my heart gets completely smashed? >>KM gives Life the finger<<
Brittjean06 Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 Yeah sometimes life can feel like its laughing at you but everyone is so quick to get " married " now and days there is no telling how it will turn out. What relationship are you beating your self up for?
Author KittenMoon Posted August 9, 2006 Author Posted August 9, 2006 Yeah sometimes life can feel like its laughing at you but everyone is so quick to get " married " now and days there is no telling how it will turn out. What relationship are you beating your self up for? Unfortunately, none of these people I know are rushing in- most have been in the relationships between 3-10 YEARS. But many of these are also their first real relationships. I question myself: They have no doubts, so why did i? (about my 6+ yr "first real" relationship) Irony: It's a b*tch.
Blackfrost Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 everybody seems married and happy when you're single and can't find someone worth a damn, and conversely, every seems to be single and having a blast when your married and having problems with your SO.
alphamale Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 They all seem happy. The operative word above is "seem"...
silentcharon Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 I'll join you! *gives life the middle fingered salute*
Author KittenMoon Posted August 9, 2006 Author Posted August 9, 2006 I'll join you! *gives life the middle fingered salute* I sorta feel like I wanna have a good cry and a good laugh about everything. Actually, really I just feel like laughing... that slightly hysterical laugh anyways... :lmao:
Author KittenMoon Posted August 9, 2006 Author Posted August 9, 2006 everybody seems married and happy when you're single and can't find someone worth a damn, and conversely, every seems to be single and having a blast when your married and having problems with your SO. I don't know anyone who is single and having a blast...
amaysngrace Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 They have no doubts, so why did i? You should learn to trust those doubts, KM. You had them for a reason. Don't ever second-guess yourself. Life's too short to live with regret. Realize you made a decision and stick to your guns that it was the right one. Cause, truly, everything happens for a reason.
Author KittenMoon Posted August 9, 2006 Author Posted August 9, 2006 You should learn to trust those doubts, KM. You had them for a reason. Don't ever second-guess yourself. Life's too short to live with regret. Realize you made a decision and stick to your guns that it was the right one. Cause, truly, everything happens for a reason. >sigh< I didn't make a decision... he did. Sort of. Haha. >sigh< But I do realize doubts are doubts, regardless of what happens. My gut has yet to be wrong, even when I've ignored it...... Stupid gut.
amaysngrace Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 >sigh< I didn't make a decision... he did. Sort of. Haha. >sigh< Oops! Sorry. Mind if I give the middle finger to HIM??
Author KittenMoon Posted August 9, 2006 Author Posted August 9, 2006 Oops! Sorry. Mind if I give the middle finger to HIM?? Be my guest.... :lmao:
Brittjean06 Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 Married cuples just seem happy because they truely forgot the blessings of being single , did that make sense? I hope so. You've experienced love and being single you feel like you need this love to be happy. Remember being truely single never falling in love you were completely happy Im sure you were. Yeah they seem happy and they could be happy but they could also be questioning the single life and missing it as well. Its a lose lose situation sometimes. Your in a relationship- ya miss the single life- Your single- you miss the relationship life. Kittenmoon I've never asked you this and Im just curious how old are you? and how long ago was this relationship why did it end? No new bea since than;)? haha
Author KittenMoon Posted August 9, 2006 Author Posted August 9, 2006 Married cuples just seem happy because they truely forgot the blessings of being single , did that make sense? I hope so. You've experienced love and being single you feel like you need this love to be happy. Remember being truely single never falling in love you were completely happy Im sure you were. Yeah they seem happy and they could be happy but they could also be questioning the single life and missing it as well. Its a lose lose situation sometimes. Your in a relationship- ya miss the single life- Your single- you miss the relationship life. Kittenmoon I've never asked you this and Im just curious how old are you? and how long ago was this relationship why did it end? No new bea since than;)? haha Brit- I'm 25. I was in my relationship for over 6 years. It ended for reasons i still can't quite explain. I'd direct you to my old posts but they're fairly hysterical. It'll be 6 months since the breakup this weekend, so in perspective, not that long. And unfortunately, I was never happy before I met him, I was miserable (but this had more to do with my life in college, where I met him, being vastly superior to my life in high school and my hometown, which sucked). Fortunately, I'm not as miserable as I was back then, nor am I anywhere near as happy as I was in my relationship. Anyways, I have the serious urge to call up all my friends and be like: "Guys, you know I love you, but you need to stop having these mature well-adjusted relationships because they piss me off now." :lmao: Sadly, they'd all understand and try to comfort me... and then I would berate them more for being mature and well adjusted towards me.
Brittjean06 Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 Yeah but your right 6 months is not a long time at all especially for a 6 year relationship? and your 25 your still young of course ! Your feeling bitter towards your friends because in a way you feel lonely and they don't. Your not jealous you just want someone to feel as you do probaly. Well alot of people here feel the same way if that helps haha. I'm sure their is a guy made just for you and honestly 6 months is not enough time to be over someone and its not enough time to actually be ready for someone else.
Author KittenMoon Posted August 9, 2006 Author Posted August 9, 2006 I'm sure their is a guy made just for you and honestly 6 months is not enough time to be over someone and its not enough time to actually be ready for someone else. Yea, all this is true. I'm just wallowing in the annoying yet somewhat comical irony that a year ago I hardly knew anyone who was married/engaged, and now suddenly it's like an explosion of weddings and googly eyes. I have my cousin's wedding in two weeks... of course, she's almost 40. At least I finally have a chance to wear all my dresses and fancy jewelry. And in 10 years... I can wear all this stuff to the divorce parties! Hahaha.
the_alchemyst Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 I think people tend to notice what is there or what is not there when they wish it was there or wasn't there. In my head that makes sense, and kudos to you if it makes any sense to you. But, again, I am in the same boat. One of my friends is getting married, and she was by far the most "insecure" out of the bunch of us. She always kept saying that she wasn't ready to settle down, that she didn't want a family anytime soon, and that she wasn't even sure if she ever wanted a family of her own. Ever. Well, she'll be married come September. Another friend (although not as close) is getting married this weekend. She's been with her SO for about 4 years already. Dang. And a few, like 5-6, people I know are engaged, some to be married early next year, others in the summer, a few in the last quarter, and some still don't know when. Why! STOP! Your timing is not good for me, don't you see? What the hell? Why is everyone getting married? Why? Why now?! It's okay. I'm sure half, if not almost all, will be divorced come a few years.
Diver012 Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 I find when life is laughing at me, I laugh back! Seems to help...
alphamale Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 And in 10 years... I can wear all this stuff to the divorce parties! Hahaha. ...thats about right KM!!!
Author KittenMoon Posted August 9, 2006 Author Posted August 9, 2006 ...thats about right KM!!! I've already begun choosing sides (in the cases where I am friends with both). :lmao: Ok.... too much dark humor today...
Ariadne Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 And in 10 years... I can wear all this stuff to the divorce parties! Hahaha. Hahhaahha Edit: They make divorce parties? haha
Sand&Water Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 STOP! Your timing is not good for me, don't you see? What the hell? Why is everyone getting married? Why? Why now?! Initially emerged from the Hollywood marriage-baby-making epidemic. I don't get it, either. So many people are getting married, thesedays. What's the rush? It is, definately, not the thing for me right now. Doubt in a few years. Think decade. Someone special will cross your path, KittenMoon. If you want you can marry now, divorce within a fews. You'll realize at one point that you've only taken advantage of yourself -and hence the return to square one. Patience. Patience.
Author KittenMoon Posted August 9, 2006 Author Posted August 9, 2006 KM, will you marry me? Depends: How big is the ring, your wallet, and your d*ck? jk. In conclusion...... yes. And in a few years we can have a divorce party!! (they are all the rage right now)
alphamale Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 KM, will you marry me? buzz off! I've already got dibs I have this thing for tortured women
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