Oh silly me Posted August 7, 2006 Posted August 7, 2006 I have been involved in a long distance relationship with a girl from france. we mwt in Graz about this time last year and we instantly hit it off. when she came to visit me in ireland we agreed upon saying good by that we wernt into any thing serious togeather as i was in my finaly year and she was just out of a tough relationship. famous last words. Any way i got cold feet and thought i might loose her as she was in contact with her ex boyfriend still. Things progressed and I visited her in paris, I guess i was a bit paranoid about the ex boyfriend and truth be know i made it clear that I wanted somthing seroius or nothing. We agreed to a seroius relationship but my gut just kept saying that i should get out. The night before my first final year exam we had a big fight, both to blame but it totally threw me and exams didnt go so well. So we fixed what happened there but when she came to ireland I just got this vibe that she wasnt enjoying her self. She was but i cant figure out wheather that is her personality or if somthing was the matter. she made me feel like I wasn't making her happy and for a longdistance relationship I got really worried. I guess I was just protecting my self. I just always felt somthing was wrong, that perhaps she was just setteling for me or she had given up trying for some one else. The worst thing that happened was that I told her that I love her which I do but she replied with, I know you do. What kind of a response is that. She says that she is the type of person who doesnt jump through the roof with emotions and well i do believe that but I never know where i stand with her and i have asked her on several occasions to give me more feedback but she still doesnt. I have tried to breakk up with her several times, to which she as cried and on one occasion threatened to jump out a window. I had to physically restrain her. Like I know she wouldnt do it its just a childish thing she never grew out of. I hate seeing her in pain and i know she cares a hell of a lot for me but, i think that what she feels isnt enough. any what I did next I will regret for the rest of my life. I went to visit her about 5 weeks ago in paris, i didnt want to be there and ended up on my own. Well I guess I only have my self to blame for what happened next. I read through part of her diary becase i wanted to know what was going on. I mean this is long distance and i do love her but i am not nieve, maybe I am a bit stupid though. So i read it and she has been having feelings for her ex, who did a typical guy thing and slept with her a few months and then just never called again so she said that she was pregnant just to talk with him. She says it was just a phans and any way he is in Iraq at the moment. So i got the hell out of there and left the diary open, on thing lead to another and we talked it through. I know she likes me alot and she treats me well but we have problems in that I find it difficult to trus some one that has no problem with me not trusting her. My gut tells me to get out but I have to say there is somthing about this girl. If it did work then it would be worth however I am not afraid to be single again. It doesnt make sense, can anyone tell me what you think, I am 50/50 at the moment or maybe just plain stupid. I have a feeling that if I hadnt been so suspicious things would be ok but on the other hand if you dont look out for your self who will ?
norajane Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 I don't think either of you are ready for a serious relationship right now. You might want to take a break from this and get your head together, as should she. Clearly, there's something there between you, but it doesn't sound healthy at all.
irish_lover Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 I am now under Irish_lover i registered, I think I will just see this one one out. We definatley have somthing between us I mean you dont argue like we did for a couple of hours on the phone at a time for nothing. I under stand her now and I can say if we work out I will be so happy but its such a strange story. I think i could write a novel on all the things that have happened between us. I have a feeling things will work out in the end, I love her just hope our bond is strong enough, i guess only time will tell.
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