BrwnEyz13 Posted August 6, 2006 Posted August 6, 2006 **Long Story Warning*** I've been wanting to ask out my coworker for quite some time now and finally got to do so. I know, i know don't dip the pen in company ink etc etc, but we r both teenagers and work part time so while there r still risks, they aren't as big as the other situations. Well we started working together about 4 months ago. She had a bf and i layed back and played it cool respecting her relationship and she took note of that and asked me why couldnt the other guys be like me. We work in a clothing store, so when she's not getting hit on by my other coworkers, she gets hit on by the customers. Well one day we were talking and she mentioned that she and her bf had broken up outta no where. Then i started catching her looking at me and we'd joke and flirt around. We tried hangin out b4 but our timing was always off and she'd suggest that i go w/ her to family parties and stuff. Well i remember her mentioning that she luvs Cirque Du Soliel and I bought the tickets. My sis and her bf were going so I figured this would be a good double date and I also figured it wouldn't be as threatening as a 1 on 1 date, I don't want to scare her away. When I asked her out she was a really excited and sed she'd luv to go and that she'd get back to me. I didn't tell her that i bought the tickets already b/c they are non-refundable and I didn't want to force her to go w/ me if she didn't want to. Then she got a lil wishy-washy and sed she'd ask her mom b/c it'd be pointless and expensive to go twice (she catches their show every year and is part of the fan club). Finally she got back to me and sed she explained it to her mom and would luv to go w/ me. So the date is this saturday and Im nervous and excited, but i dont show her that lol. What confuses me is that everytime i try to have a conversation w/ her over the phone, wether it be texting or an actual call she always keeps them abrupt and ends them first, why is that? And she broke up w/ her bf about a month and a half ago and don't want to put her in any bad situations. I want to be aggressive and pursue a relationship w/ her, but at the same time I understand that she just got out of one. What can I do to let her know that I want to be more than friends, but not frustrate or confuse her? I was thinking about mentioning it to her, but thought it would be too weird and up front considering this will be our first date. And judging from my story do thing look good for me?
Sonic_chaos Posted August 6, 2006 Posted August 6, 2006 personal experience mate. Keep it cool. Dont mention anything like that. I did try it digging deeper asking my ex if there is a possiblity she would still wanna be with me after i come off vacation and it sorta freaked her out abit. See how the first date goes. See how she is with you as a date not as friends. It really does depends how hooked up she was with her ex and if she has let go. she could still be talking to him and the abrupt texts are frustrated ones. She could be telling you to back off abit as you do work with her as well. So maybe working then seeing her at night, like not having a break not seeing you could be frustrating her. Never can tell dude. but for me, i would play it cool for now. more maybe take a red rose with you to the gig? that keeps it as it is but lets her know you want something alittle more?? Just throwing ideas around. As i aint the best in these situations im affraid.
Author BrwnEyz13 Posted August 7, 2006 Author Posted August 7, 2006 We rarely see eachother, maybe once a week, if that w/ the way our managers schedule everyone. I asked my sis about this and she says this sounds normal and that its prob just my insecurities creeping up on me, hopefully i can just keep my composure.
Author BrwnEyz13 Posted August 7, 2006 Author Posted August 7, 2006 Some other big things that I left out were that she is younger than me, about a year and a half. Her parents are divorced and she has 6 ex-boyrfriends; she told me they all broke up w/ her and that it wasn't her fault. So this makes things a little difficult b/c I want a relationship, but have to be careful and watch my steps. I want to hold her hand, hug, flirt, and try to kiss her on this first date (if the moment is right), but at the same time don't want to do these things fearing that I may scare her away.
Sonic_chaos Posted August 7, 2006 Posted August 7, 2006 try and resist mate, but be sincere with it. Dont go cold and make her think you arent intrested. It sounds like you like her alot so its just the case of getting to know if she feels the same. If she thinks your coming on too strong too soon in the date she will back away i think. so just keep her intrested in you, dont give everything about you away and it should smoothly. If its a gig your going to, there wont be alot of oppotunities for you to get involved as 80% of the night will be listening to the music/dancing/sing etc.. Similar age is good, as you can relate to her age wise, dont take too much about the past ie gfs/bfs.. just take it as it comes mate. If it feels right.. do as you wish
Author BrwnEyz13 Posted August 7, 2006 Author Posted August 7, 2006 Haha yeah I really do like her and have been waiting a while to go on a date w/ her. I just don't want to screw up this long awaited opportunity b/c so far eveytime I expected a no, I got my way. So I wanted to jump for joy each time it happened lol. Well thanks for all of your help and wish me luck
moman Posted August 8, 2006 Posted August 8, 2006 Good luck, dont' take any flowers. Keep things natural and don't force anything that doesn't "happen". If there is no kiss, then so be it.
Author BrwnEyz13 Posted August 10, 2006 Author Posted August 10, 2006 lol awesome I was just gonna ask if i should bring ne flowers. And as far as letting things happen if they do, how will i know when to do them b/c i have little to no dating experience at all; the things being, holding hands, kissing, when to hold her, etc etc. Can u guys/girls give me some signs of when she wants those things to happen w/o her actually saying hey do this.
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