My ANGER is eating me alive--justified? .

[Guest]

I went to see a doc about the most embarassing of problems-- weird discharge. The first doc said it looked like an STD which caused me to freak out because I have NEVER done anything that would put me in a position to get an STD. That caused me to doubt my trust with my monogamous partner which is a very scary thing.

 

I called the doctor several times within a two week period before my test results came back and doctor NEVER responded. I only got a nurse who couldn't tell me much except the doctor was busy and she might not call back and I should just wait for test results.

 

Tests came back negative. It was obvious it was an infection but just not an STD. I never got medication and she never called back. So I made another appointment with another doc.

 

The following was THE MOST humiliating thing that has ever happened to me.

 

I literally ARGUED for a hour with the doctor for healthcare and extra tests. This doc backed up the decision of the first (they are residents working at the same place) stating it was standard protocol and sometimes they are just too busy to return all patient phone calls. But she didn't just argue, she was MOCKING my apparently puny knowledge of my condition which I had extensively researched online. It was humiliating.

 

After the argument, I still had to lay on my back and let her do the exam. Then she tacked on at the end.. extra fees because of what she felt was extra time for an unecessary visit.

 

In the end, after being seen somewhere else, I WAS diagnosed with something, but NOT an STD. It was an obvious error on their part.

 

---I have so MUCH hate everytime I think about how vulnerable I was as a patient. I felt emotionally raped by that experience.

 

I fantasize about things I would do if I could get revenge..from revoking their liscenses to a public humiliation to physically mutilating the doctors in some way.

 

I just don't know how to let go or am not willing to yet. AAk, am I going nuts? Over-reacting?

[burning 4 revenge]

public humiliation and physical mutilation?

 

yes, i think you are over-reacting

[destination_unknown]

Ok, I think the fantasies of multilation are a little bit of an over-reaction.

 

Yes, they made a mistake. Yes, they were insensitive. Yes, they have a responsibility to make sure you are comfortable with the way you are treated / examined. But, no I wouldn't expect my Dr. to return every phone call, if the results are not back they are not back. I would simply expect that they call when they do get the results. Some Doctors, like any profession, can be really patronising. I just wouldn't go to that surgery anymore if your not happy with the Drs. bedside manner.

[Outcast]

You are seriously overreacting. You were wrong to insist that their diagnosis was nutso - it's not as if diagnosing infections or STDs is difficult or complicated so you should not have been so adamant in the first place. I don't think doctors are gods, but some things are fairly simple to diagnose.

 

Have you any form of hypochondria? Your fury at YOUR ideas about your health being disregarded is badly misplaced and bespeaks an underlying issue. One that may need to be addressed by a professional.

[destination_unknown]

Gosh, you should come into contact with the Dr. I had when I was in the "lock up" - I was in a locked psych ward for three months at 17 years of age under at his discretion and only met the guy for ten mins the whole time! Talk about not returning calls :lmao:

 

I don't mean to belittle your experience, just trying to inject a little humour. Seriously though, dont take what happened personally. Why do you think it matters to you so much?

[Guest]

Thanks all for your replies.

 

First, I'd like to say...I would never act on those fantasies. They are an outlet for my anger.

 

Second, this has been a chronic infection. I have seen 4-5 docs for this simple problem in the span of half a year. A few wrong turns in the beginning was okay because I realize it's trial and error sometimes.

 

Would you not be angry if you couldn't get people to believe or treat seriously something you KNOW is abnormal rather than giving you a brush off? A simple prescription could take care of an unnecessarily chronic problem. And I feel it was an obvious brush off.

 

It should not have been a hard diagnosis, but it resulted in an untreated infection that might have lead to more serious infertility issues and I was worried.

 

Why does it matter so much? Because it is MY health. The infection is in MY body. If I couldn't have children later, it would not be their problem, but MINE.

 

Maybe I overreacted, but I am also in the health care profession and it tends to cause me to judge those in the profession with a harsher eye.

 

I really hope I will never cause someone that much grief.

[Guest]

I don't think doctors are gods, but some things are fairly simple to diagnose.

 

Have you any form of hypochondria? Your fury at YOUR ideas about your health being disregarded is badly misplaced and bespeaks an underlying issue. One that may need to be addressed by a professional.

 

Outcast, it was supposed to be simple. I think it was obvious to anyone, that the discharge was abnormal (even the doc thought the STD test would be positive) but when my results came back negative for STDs, I never got any feedback from the first doc. Essentially, fell through the holes in the system. I should have gotten some kind of followup at least.

 

The second doc was really reluctant to do any further tests since her reasoning was: if it is not an STD, and not two other common problems (according to the first doc), it must be NORMAL!

 

Why couldn't she help me try to find out if it is anything else or if the first doc made a mistake? Especially since I kept telling her that I had never in my life had this problem and that the other doc also recognized it as unusual and thought my STD test would be positive.

 

I had to fight her for further tests. And for the record, there WAS an infection as diagnosed later by someone else.

 

It's frustrating when you KNOW something is wrong but people think you're overreacting and a hypochondriac and don't belive you....and that is why you can't get a simple treatment you need to cure it.

[Guest]

I felt like they screwed up twice...once with a misdiagnosis while being ignored and a second time another misdiagnosis with serious aggrevation. Neither time were they gracious about any of it.

 

I can deal with a misdiagnosis if they are trying to help/treat me. I'm ok if they tell me they don't know and I need to see a specialist. I'm ok if they don't know but try to DO something or at least find out. What I cannot stand is what I feel they were doing...refusal to admit wrong, ignoring the patient (weather intentional or not), and the politics of trying to cover their butt.

 

I am angry because politics should not come at the expense of my health care.

 

I am angry because I should be focusing on a daunting test coming up and I have to take time off so somebody can tell me nothing is wrong when it should be obvious.

 

I am angry because I fought so hard to even get that appointment since earliest appointment was a 1 month wait. And when I finally went to the office there were NO other patients there.

 

I am angry because I see everyday thick white discharge that becomes more yellow. I will not lie, it freaks me out and knowing that many women with chronic pelvic inflammatory disorder do not have any other obvious symptoms does not help.

 

I try to help myself the best I can, but I feel helpless to do anything.

 

I am angry because after being humiliated, I let that doc do an invasive pelvic on me. I was not called any names, but some very strong words with negative connotation were used.

 

I am angry because my insurance should cover the exam, but the an extra copay was tacked on after the unpleasant ordeal. If not out of malice, why else? If the second exam was a follow-up scheduled by the first doctor, I would not have been charged.

 

I don't know, maybe I'm still overreacting.

[Guest]

What does everyone think given all above info, still overreacting? Need to calm down or do I have a right to be mad?

 

Replies would be helpful. Thanks.