Green Posted August 10, 2006 Posted August 10, 2006 Buttaflyy send and email to [email protected] before you go smoking cigars
genegri Posted August 10, 2006 Posted August 10, 2006 Glad it all worked out. But seriously, children taking father's last name is only a tradition, and an unfair one at that. Men shouldn't take it for granted. She has every right to give the baby her last name. If giving your baby your last name made you a radical, then most men were hopeless radicals.
Trimmer Posted August 11, 2006 Posted August 11, 2006 One could say that the husband is stubborn and is set in traditional ways attempting to claim ownership/property rights on this female child as well...... But seriously, children taking father's last name is only a tradition, and an unfair one at that. Men shouldn't take it for granted. She has every right to give the baby her last name. If giving your baby your last name made you a radical, then most men were hopeless radicals. I know the drama has now passed, but I have to stand up for this father with a reminder that the issue wasn't that he was some kind of stubborn traditionalist, insisting that the baby have only his last name... As a matter of fact, the issue was that the mom wanted to give the baby only her last name, and at that time, was unwilling to even compromise on a combined or hyphenated version. In other words, she specifically wanted (at that time) to exclude the father's name, while he was willing to consider ways to meet in the middle. It didn't sound to me like he was taking things for granted, or insisting on exclusive ownership or "property rights"... I'm glad it worked out, too.
RecordProducer Posted August 11, 2006 Posted August 11, 2006 Are they officially married or just living together? In any case, YOU stay away and don't put your nose where it doesn't belong. They will find a solution and you will be the black sheep. Not saying you intended to interfere... just in case it crossed your mind.
Guest Posted August 11, 2006 Posted August 11, 2006 my daugher has my last name. we werent married and had no intentions of ever being that way. i wasnt sure how long he would actually be around and didnt want to deal with the drama that would bring later in life. hes still around 3 years later and wont go anywhere. but im glad for me decision. his only stipulation is if i ever marry, i cant change her name to his. which is fine, gives me a valid excuse to keep mine sounds like a little security blanket for her
Buttaflyy Posted August 11, 2006 Posted August 11, 2006 my daugher has my last name. we werent married and had no intentions of ever being that way. i wasnt sure how long he would actually be around and didnt want to deal with the drama that would bring later in life. hes still around 3 years later and wont go anywhere. but im glad for me decision. his only stipulation is if i ever marry, i cant change her name to his. which is fine, gives me a valid excuse to keep mine sounds like a little security blanket for her I'm curious to know what's secure about your baby not having the fathers name? IMO, the security is in the opposite. If the baby has dad's family name, this automatically presumes paternity. What drama would unfold if you and dad had broken up and baby had his name? I really don't get it?
audmc911 Posted August 28, 2006 Posted August 28, 2006 I just heard last night that my boyfriend's nephew's girlfriend is giving the baby her last name! I didn't think that was even legal. My feeling was that if the mother knows who the father is, legally, it has to have the Father's name. I was shocked to learn that a mother can do this!
a4a Posted August 28, 2006 Posted August 28, 2006 I just heard last night that my boyfriend's nephew's girlfriend is giving the baby her last name! I didn't think that was even legal. My feeling was that if the mother knows who the father is, legally, it has to have the Father's name. I was shocked to learn that a mother can do this! Your right we need to schedule a public stoning for this wayward woman. Hey if it is not your kid why should you care? I think it is shocking that people name their kids terrible names like Mojolatta and Thelma or worse yet Miracle and Scruples..... but not my business.
bab Posted August 28, 2006 Posted August 28, 2006 I just heard last night that my boyfriend's nephew's girlfriend is giving the baby her last name! I'm shocked that women who aren't married are even allowed to have children! What is this world coming to!!
audmc911 Posted August 28, 2006 Posted August 28, 2006 Call me naive, but I seriously did not think it was legal to do that! There's also more to the story...he bought her a big, beautiful house and $18K diamond ring - and she won't sign a pre-nup, so she left him. So, whatever...I was just surprised that she could legally give the baby her last name! I have worked for attorneys for 15 years too. I must be really naive or just plain old-fashioned and/or dumb! lol:eek:
Outcast Posted August 28, 2006 Posted August 28, 2006 or worse yet Miracle and Scruples..... Chastity has got to be the worst. Imagine the hell in high school!
a4a Posted August 28, 2006 Posted August 28, 2006 Call me naive, but I seriously did not think it was legal to do that! There's also more to the story...he bought her a big, beautiful house and $18K diamond ring - and she won't sign a pre-nup, so she left him. So, whatever...I was just surprised that she could legally give the baby her last name! I have worked for attorneys for 15 years too. I must be really naive or just plain old-fashioned and/or dumb! lol:eek: You can call the kid fido if you wanted to. Of course you can name the child with the mothers last name alone. Well looks like she did not want to sign a prenup...... her choice. Some would be shocked that he asked for a prenup That is not old fashioned or traditional in any sense...they sound like a pretty modern couple...or were. Maybe you are hinting that the child is not his????
audmc911 Posted August 28, 2006 Posted August 28, 2006 No - not hinting that the child isn't his - it just never occurred to me that a baby would be given the mother's last name when the father is in the picture. I just really didn't think it was legal to do that. I don't know. Like I said, I must be naive! Call me old-fashioned. My daughter and I have two different last names - I changed mine back to my maiden name after my divorce.
audmc911 Posted August 28, 2006 Posted August 28, 2006 I'm shocked that women who aren't married are even allowed to have children! What is this world coming to!! So rude...
a4a Posted August 28, 2006 Posted August 28, 2006 Chastity has got to be the worst. Imagine the hell in high school! Dick Jr.
Buttaflyy Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 No - not hinting that the child isn't his - it just never occurred to me that a baby would be given the mother's last name when the father is in the picture. I just really didn't think it was legal to do that. I don't know. Like I said, I must be naive! Call me old-fashioned. My daughter and I have two different last names - I changed mine back to my maiden name after my divorce. I agree with you here. It seems like the father has the right to the last name to me.
genegri Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 I agree with you here. It seems like the father has the right to the last name to me. It's more of a tradition than a right. My son has my lastname and I have never been charged for it.
Buttaflyy Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 It's more of a tradition than a right. My son has my lastname and I have never been charged for it. What I mean by right is that since we get the glory of carrying the baby, we know the baby belongs to us, shouldn't dad be entitled to something? He did help with this. And also, I'd think it's baby's right to have dad's last name for parternity.
a4a Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 What I mean by right is that since we get the glory of carrying the baby, we know the baby belongs to us, shouldn't dad be entitled to something? He did help with this. And also, I'd think it's baby's right to have dad's last name for parternity. well maybe it is more right for the child to have both family names? Glory of carrying the baby? :lmao: Sorry I don't think "glory" is how all would see it. sick, hemmroids, labor, swelling, c-sections....glory? Hell if you look at it that way all babies should have only the mothers last name... They earned the right to name the baby after them alone Yeah dad helped he had an orgasm in mom....... :lmao:
Buttaflyy Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 well maybe it is more right for the child to have both family names? Glory of carrying the baby? :lmao: Sorry I don't think "glory" is how all would see it. sick, hemmroids, labor, swelling, c-sections....glory? Hell if you look at it that way all babies should have only the mothers last name... They earned the right to name the baby after them alone Yeah dad helped he had an orgasm in mom....... :lmao: LMAO! I said glory sarcastically! I also thought of eating my words because it did point more toward the mother having earned the right to any and everything! You know what I mean though, afterall, it's easier to sue for child support if the child has the father's last name. Otherwise, you have to prove paternity.
a4a Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 LMAO! I said glory sarcastically! I also thought of eating my words because it did point more toward the mother having earned the right to any and everything! You know what I mean though, afterall, it's easier to sue for child support if the child has the father's last name. Otherwise, you have to prove paternity. Well if I accidently got pregnant and the father was forced to pay or be involved I don't think I would bother. I rather be rid of him in all aspects....the money would not be worth the hassle to me. Or to keep a loser in our life at all. and heck you can just go on the Maury show and get a free paternity test can't ya? :lmao:
Buttaflyy Posted August 29, 2006 Posted August 29, 2006 Well if I accidently got pregnant and the father was forced to pay or be involved I don't think I would bother. I rather be rid of him in all aspects....the money would not be worth the hassle to me. Or to keep a loser in our life at all. and heck you can just go on the Maury show and get a free paternity test can't ya? :lmao: Yeah I know what you mean, but at the same time, I don't think it's right to totally cut the child off from her other family if they want to be involved. To me it's the natural thing to do unless he doesn't want it. LMAO, you definitely are right!
audmc911 Posted August 30, 2006 Posted August 30, 2006 I just don't get it at all! Why in the world would a Wife of a loving Husband and soon-to-be Father give the baby HER last name! I never heard of such a thing in my life! Doesn't sound like their marriage is too good at all! Man, she must be really pissed at him or he just lets her walk all over her. If I were him, I'd take her to Court! Just totallY disrespectful - and I am a woman and mother of a daughter and former Wife! TAKE HER TO COURT! SET PRECEDENT!
Roo Posted August 30, 2006 Posted August 30, 2006 OHH WOW!! what a crazy thing to argue over... geeze I didn't change my last name till my first was born but I thought it would be nice for the whole family to have the same last name, honestly I wonder if it's him who's really so concearned or if his family is getting on him that the wife is not carrying on the familiy name ... you would not believe the crap I heard from my IL's aboutn ot having taken their name... (and after the way they behave now I kinda wish I hadnt lol) Tell him to tell her she can do it if its so important to her once she gets that baby out she'll be so relieved she'll recant!
a4a Posted August 30, 2006 Posted August 30, 2006 Taking the surname of the H is actually a tradition which shows ownership. Women lost their property and rights upon marriage and took the husbands name. Why must the mans name be held in higher regard than the womans? Is he a more worthy human? Is his family of higher importance?
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