Guest Posted August 4, 2006 Posted August 4, 2006 Me and my ex were on off for about 3 years. I broke her heart twice. Once when i moved and decided i didnt want to try a long distance relationship and a second when i told her i was gonna propose to her so she would move with me. (about 4 hours drive from home). I then backed off when i found out she had been seeing a guy right up until we got back together but never told me about it. So anyways, here we are a year later and we had already gotten together and then broken it off about 4 months ago and now im ready to propose again but she is seeing another guy and she says she wants the space to try to see if it can work. Yet she met me for lunch this week when i was in town and she is going to attend a wedding ceremony with me this weekend. And when we went for lunch, we had great conversation, (we have always got a long great, especially in person, best friends as if) and she let me buy her a digital camera. And i know her and knowing her, if she had really moved on she wouldnt have let me buy it for her. I know its a very simplified version. But any thoughts? she knows i want her back and distance is still an issue. She says she wants to stay friends so we can still have a chance in the future. What does this mean?
WiseOne Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 Well your sistuation doesnt sound very good at this time, the best thing for you to do is to find out more on how she feels so you can know what route to take with this issue. This might hurt but it sounds like she might be trying to move on, i mean she does have another bf. Or she might just be scared to get hurt again, so it would be best in that point to try to work your trust back up again. But whatever you do i think you should give her space, unlest she begins to persue you.
GB111 Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 At this point, it doesn't seem there's much you can do. In my experience, trying to "convince" her to try again will only serve the opposite. I would suggest giving her the space she seeks. In that time, take care of yourself and leave her to initiate all contact with you, if any. When she's ready for you, nothing will stop her. Until then, you don't have a full commitment from her, and anything short of that should be unacceptable. Best, GB
alphamale Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 She says she wants to stay friends so we can still have a chance in the future. What does this mean? It means that you are already history or about to be history. Either way, cut your losses and move on.
WiseOne Posted August 9, 2006 Posted August 9, 2006 The last 2 guys are right. And lets use common sense here, she says she needs time, well why does she have a bf, when a girl needs time she stays single and doesnt wanna be in any relationship what so ever. Shes setting you up for the big fall, somebodys kicked some sense into her about you breaking her heart, she could be seeking revenge, or up to playing mind games, or just doesnt want you anymore. Try NC ( NO CONTACT) its the best thing i've done it before, and everytime i did it the Ex started calling so much it became aggravating.
loveinlife Posted August 10, 2006 Posted August 10, 2006 The last 2 guys are right. And lets use common sense here, she says she needs time, well why does she have a bf, when a girl needs time she stays single and doesnt wanna be in any relationship what so ever. Shes setting you up for the big fall, somebodys kicked some sense into her about you breaking her heart, she could be seeking revenge, or up to playing mind games, or just doesnt want you anymore. Try NC ( NO CONTACT) its the best thing i've done it before, and everytime i did it the Ex started calling so much it became aggravating. That happened to me before. When I pursue her she doesn't pursue me. Vice versa. I think I need to do NC too. GL.
WiseOne Posted August 10, 2006 Posted August 10, 2006 Well it only works if the girl is still kinda into you, you cant wait until the last minute to apply NC. But the worse thing you can do is persue a girl tooo much, that will only push her away, and i'll tell you why. I know we all have had someone beg us for something at one time in our life, and most of the time it just boostes our ego becuz we get the big head so we try to reform from doing whatever it is becuz we like that feeling, it gives us high self esteem. But you can aggravate a girl by persueing her too much and then that would really be bad.
Guest Posted August 10, 2006 Posted August 10, 2006 NC is for all of you who think your exes arent into you anymore. But i agree that you cant be too pushy either. But you all have to be more positive. Wallowing and being depressed sure as hell wont get your girl back. Just you watch, my girl will be coming back soon. Just got to be a playa, players. Take charge, be a man, be a leader, dont be a wuss. Im the guy whose story this is by the way.
xxrubyredxx Posted August 17, 2006 Posted August 17, 2006 She says she wants to stay friends so we can still have a chance in the future. What does this mean? It means that if nothing better comes along, then she might consider taking you back. If something better does come along, then 'au revoir' my friend. Move on, don't put your life on hold for her.
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