KLG Posted August 3, 2006 Posted August 3, 2006 I read everyday what others experience here on Loveshack. My problems seem to the same or similar. At this point in my life, I seem to facing many different things and I find myself overwhemed. #1: About 3 months ago I found out that my bf of 9mos was actually married and living with his wife. We had a short break up while he filed for divorce and moved out. This has been very difficult to work through, but everything he has said has come to pass. I feel ok about this to some degree. It won't be totally ok until divorce is final. Still a serious source of stress. #2: My 16 year old daughter is bipolar and has made her 3rd suicide attemt in the last year. Her father has washed his hands of his daughter and says he can't take it anymore. His idea is to put this already unstable child into foster care. Not something I agree with and have taken full responsibility for her and her treatment at this point. I am scard! I have come up with an extensive treatment plan for her and believe this will be a big help to our situation. Still another serious source of stress. I personally am struggling with axiety and depression, that leads to my inability to focus on work and other areas of my life. Any words of wisdom? Thanks
SoCalCatman72 Posted August 3, 2006 Posted August 3, 2006 Hi KLG, I don't know about words of wisdom, but I can offer my opinions and experience, especially with item 2. 1. You have had a BF for 9 mos who is married and living with his wife. Now if I am interpreting your statement correctly, you and him broke up, then he filed for divorce. I'm not clear as to whether you found out he was married, then broke up, then he filed for divorce, or if the scenario was that he filed for divorce, confessed to you, then you guys broke up. Regardless, this is a man who has cheated on his wife with you, and now is divorcing her to be with you. So what's going to stop him from repeating this cycle when he gets tired of you? 2. Your daughter is struggling with a disease that so much of the world does not understand. Right now as an adolescent, she is dealing with changes in her emotions, changes in her body, development of a social structure and a mind that is feeding mixed signals to her brain. (It's important to differentiate between the mind and the brain). The father "washing his hands" of her is a reaction of frustration, desperation and ignorance, however to put this child into foster care would be a grave and potentially life threatening mistake. Please understand when I say the BP is a disease, and is clinically considered to be "life threatening", as such is covered under most major medical insurance plans. BP if untreated has a mortality rate of about 30%. It is heartening to hear that you are developing a treatment plan, the most important thing is to stick to the medication. Inherent to the treatment of BP is the fact that when the patient starts on medication, they begin to feel better and then think that they don't need the meds, so they go off them, and are back in a BP cycle again. I know you are scared, but the commitment you have decided to make is noble. I have suffered from Bipolar Type 2 since I was 13. I wish at that time that I had a family who cared enough about me to take the steps you are taking. Good luck and feel free to message me if you want more references on Bipolar Disorder.
In Sync Posted August 3, 2006 Posted August 3, 2006 I read everyday what others experience here on Loveshack. My problems seem to the same or similar. At this point in my life, I seem to facing many different things and I find myself overwhemed. #1: About 3 months ago I found out that my bf of 9mos was actually married and living with his wife. We had a short break up while he filed for divorce and moved out. This has been very difficult to work through, but everything he has said has come to pass. I feel ok about this to some degree. It won't be totally ok until divorce is final. Still a serious source of stress. #2: My 16 year old daughter is bipolar and has made her 3rd suicide attemt in the last year. Her father has washed his hands of his daughter and says he can't take it anymore. His idea is to put this already unstable child into foster care. Not something I agree with and have taken full responsibility for her and her treatment at this point. I am scard! I have come up with an extensive treatment plan for her and believe this will be a big help to our situation. Still another serious source of stress. I personally am struggling with axiety and depression, that leads to my inability to focus on work and other areas of my life. Any words of wisdom? Thanks I am not a professional doctor, my advice comes from my heart. I am not sure what your spiritual beliefs are. BUT I cannot emphasize enough the power of prayer. Through prayer and inner faith. I believe that you will persevere. The Infinite Universe, Divineness or God does not intend for you to fail. You will not sink but swim. I am not saying that one should neglect seeing a professional for theraphy and medical attention..I am saying that through prayer and faith in those prayers..one finds strength. People can sometimes disappoint you but maintaining your belief that there is always hope and power to overcomes negativity from whomever or whatever obstacles are thrown in your way. It is natural to be scared but through prayer you have a shield of faith because none of us get through life without adversity.
Ariadne Posted August 3, 2006 Posted August 3, 2006 Hi, Well, good thing is that you have your boyfriend by your side for support in all of this. Now, regarding your daughter, I have a 16 year old son myself and I'd say that the most important thing is to be patient with them. No matter how outrageous their ideas may be (like right now my son said that he just didn't want to go to school). You have to swallow it up and accept it. At least that's what I do. And listen to them a lot. It's a difficult age for them. Ariadne
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