LostHeart Posted August 3, 2006 Posted August 3, 2006 Me and this guy have been involved online for about six years now. Yes, you read that right. We've been partners for six years only it's always been long distant. He lives in Canada, I live in the United States. We've never met. Yes, six years and we've never once met. Now, I'm 19 (about to turn 20) and he's 18 (about to turn 19). That explains some, right? The truth is, he was going to come this summer to stay for awhile as we could finally afford it. After talking it over and such he still has yet to come. We planned that he would come and stay for awhile, maybe go back, maybe not...whatever he decided. We eventually wanted to move in together and even get married. It was all planned out. Everything was perfect. We talked on the phone nightly and we always had good laughs and conversation. Everything was going perfect, I swear. Okay, so one evening I am skimming through his email as I do at times. It's no big deal. Then I come across many emails from different girls...apparently he's been calling them too and they have been telling them they love him as well--there's TONS of flirting going on both ways. We've had issues with him calling girls in the past and we both agreed that it was wrong to do so as he was getting too flirty with them. Well, I feel betrayed a bit...I confront him. By the end of it we've argued a bit and worked things out...or so it seemed. That was maybe 2 months ago. About a week or two ago we have a spat about some things and it has ruined everything. He now is "rethinking" our relationship. He thinks we're moving too fast (six years and...what?!). He has asked to be given some time to think if we should break up. I know his decision will be yes...he's already said, "I don't love you as much as I used to" and all...and I'm just a heart-broken fool. I'm not sure what to say to him...I've told him he doesn't have to come yet if that's the deal, we don't have to move in together soon at all if that's the deal, and if he has issues with our talks of marriage then to forget marriage for now. This is all just a shock. I've talked to him every single day/night for six years and he's always been the perfect guy. Yes, he's had some issues and we've had spats but we've always worked through them. He's not the type to suddenly be like "I don't love you so much now...let's break it off after six years...sorry." He's begged to come visit before. Everything has suddenly changed and I just don't know how to deal with it. He is seriously changing right before my eyes. I made the mistake of building my life around, what I thought was going to be, a long term relationship with this guy. Advice? I know there's not much to say. "It's an online relationship--why do you expect?" but I expected a lot from this guy. I mean, our faith in eachother went so far as to believe we were both being faithful (and I do believe he has been faithful to me and I have been to him). We've spent night after night, hour after hour, day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year talking about everything. What do I do? Do I try to work this out? Do I let him go? I'm so confused. I love him very, very much but if he does not love me as much as he did before then...is it time to say goodbye? Is it time to close the little IM box and sign off? How can you leave someone you've loved for six years? Someone that you've planned your life out with. I'm shocked that he's not coming here now and I am even more shocked that he is falling out of love with me it seems. What do I do? What do I say?
Guest Posted August 3, 2006 Posted August 3, 2006 Do you really believe in love without meeting? You're still very young and can do better, I'm sure. Meeting someone in person is often far different than what you believe they're like online.
Recommended Posts