Guest Posted August 2, 2006 Posted August 2, 2006 my ex-bf emailed my best friend recently, saying how's it going and he hopes to hear from her. she's a mutual friend (definitely closer to me) that he virtually ignored during our whole relationship and in fact, seemed to care little about maintaining a friendship or acquaintanceship with. she is also married so the contacting is odd on all counts. we had a terrible breakup months ago with no contact and he jumped into another relationship weeks later, while telling others how sad he was about me. i've cut myself off from him and his friends, so know nothing about things with him now and vice versa. any theories as to what he is thinking?
morphius Posted August 3, 2006 Posted August 3, 2006 Sounds like he maybe he is fishing for information, either regarding how you are, how your coping etc... It's possible that he has a bit of a guilt thing going on regarding the break up or how he treated you, and that is why he has made this form of contact with your "best friend". She is the one who knows you the best. More info please regarding the break up? Morph
LaraV Posted August 3, 2006 Posted August 3, 2006 I agree, most likely fishing for info. Alternatively, general stupidity on someone's part - like, not realizing he's contacting your best friend.
Guest Posted August 3, 2006 Posted August 3, 2006 I agree, most likely fishing for info. Alternatively, general stupidity on someone's part - like, not realizing he's contacting your best friend. i don't understand why people "fish" for information after so many months. why not just contact the person directly? is it because they don't really want contact, just information? the break up was, i guess, mutual. more like the last straw. at any sign of conflict or disagreement he'd either abuse or disappear...often for days. then come back and pretend nothing happened and that he wanted to "work it out." this time, after years of this, i just couldn't do it again. i tried to make it as amicable as possible, once the smoke cleared. it seemed like he immediately enacted revenge: dating someone else, flaunting her immediately to all our friends (whilst crying about losing me, literally) and making no effort towards goodwill. and our pattern had always been that i chased after him when these episodes occurred, which i didn't this time, and haven't contacted him since. so maybe this fishing is all about control, anyway. problem is, it all still hurts. and having an "appearance" of sorts has made me feel it all again.
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