toonicegirl Posted August 2, 2006 Posted August 2, 2006 i read thread "what to do if she dumps you" and i think it works the other way too me and my ex broke up 3 months ago...before final break up we broke up for two weeks and i was crying and begging and we got back together...but something was different...he still didnt have time, finaly we stopped talking and i called him to get a closure...we had nice talk on the phone he was honest and still wanted to be friend...but i said no i did nc for about a 1.5 month and he broke it... now we're staying in a lc...first only he was initiating contact but now it depends... anyway his dating somebody but still messages me knowing that she doesnt like it (he started dating her a week after our break up, we both know about eachother)...two weeks ago he started sending me messages on my cell and last week he invited me to be his friend on myspace...i left him two comments but they were not personal, rather funny stupid ... and then his girl started sending me messages, calling me names, telling me to go away... he knew about it and i think they broke up cause the way she acted but the next day they were together again... i knew that it's gonna be like this cause she's too much into him and i know him he doesnt like to hurt people... he still wants to talk to me though (keeps sending me messages on my cell about things from myspace... lol) but i told him to stop sending me messages on my cell (we have myspace, so there is no point)....i know he was surprised that i asked him this and i told him that he has enough drama in his life now and i dont want to be a part of it...that was last message i sent him... i know that his girl is happy that i dont leave comments...probably she thinks that im afraid of her...haha...i already proved my point and made her insecure (she was the reason we broke up, i couldnt stand her fake frienship...i knew she wanted more) NOW I WANT HIM TO THINK ABOUT COMMING BACK TO ME on my terms cause i stayed in touch with him, he knows that there is no HARD FEELINGS...he was surprised the way i talk to him...i wasnt nice and sweet, rather nice but sarcastic and i can tell he liked it...in messages he sent me he used words like "thanks babe" or "ur the best"... now i decided to back off now... last week we were in contact like ever day and i was getting too involved so i need some time to cool off... im wondering what his next move will be
WHY1 Posted August 2, 2006 Posted August 2, 2006 I know exactly how you feel about the situation. I've been there and done that. The difference is the last time we broke up he had got caught cheating on me. Then he started callin me like always and i finally said i'm done and was'nt like before when he could just come right back even if they were on my terms again. Now his mind is blown because i'm not trying to be bothered with him.
Prettyinblack Posted August 3, 2006 Posted August 3, 2006 I was always the 'fixer' in my relationship, too. We had been together for almost 5 years, back and forth for the last year and then he wanted to work things out but acted like it SHOULD be on his terms! Gawd! Well, he didn't like mine and I told him that I wasn't doing the 'on and off' thing again......this time when he disappeared, I let him! It's been 7 weeks and he is in shock! lolo......looks good on them.....fight fire with fire, I say.
Author toonicegirl Posted August 4, 2006 Author Posted August 4, 2006 i think a lot of guys (my ex for sure) like challenges... he actually told me this but it wasnt about women...he said one day: you know im not really into... (something) cause i already have it, i can wait to start... (another thing on his to-do list)... now i know that he's the same when it comes to women.... im not gonna be nice and sweet right now... when he met me i was like "whatever"...i was kinda sarcastic but i guess i was a challenge because of this...
johnnytable Posted August 4, 2006 Posted August 4, 2006 I think that it is good to be a challenge at first until you let your sheilds down and the couple gets closer. If you are always a challenge, it just becomes tiring But I will admit that if I meet a girl and she seems a bit easy to be with, I'm less attracted to her. Probably in the back of my mind it is saying, "if she is so great, why does she have to be so easy to be with?"
Author toonicegirl Posted August 4, 2006 Author Posted August 4, 2006 I think that it is good to be a challenge at first until you let your sheilds down and the couple gets closer. If you are always a challenge, it just becomes tiring But I will admit that if I meet a girl and she seems a bit easy to be with, I'm less attracted to her. Probably in the back of my mind it is saying, "if she is so great, why does she have to be so easy to be with?" what i learned here and in my own life is that you cannot be easy in a relationship, you cannot be always there for him, you cannot change your plans cause of him, you have to have your own friends and you have to show him that you have separate life... i wasnt like this... and it got boring (i knew it...i knew that we are growing apart)
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