he is the father of my baby and he lives in another country

[longdistancepain]

Hi

I hope you guys can help me, I am really confused...3 years and a half ago I met a tourist on a beach here in Costa Rica, he is from the US, we dated for a month and then bum I was pregnant, so he said he wanted to take responsability and be not only there for him but for me too, and build a family, he left for 4 months then came back when I was 7 months pregnant he was w me in my apt, was here also when our son was born, they when he was 2 months old he left to the other side of the world to finish school (some proyect) for 4 months, when he got back into the US me and my son went there to live together, it lasted 6 months, we broke up I came back here, he came 2 months later and got back together he stayed 4 months then he left saying he was going to get everything together so we could go back there, because he was no longer livinng on an apt he was back w his mommy..we end up breaking up again because of this damn distance he came back this last oct...guess what..we got back together....I went for 2 weeks there for x-mas and then he came 2 weeks in may so basically since oct last year he's been saying that he is trying to get "his **** together" thats how he calls it..he just graduated trying to look 4 a better job bla bla bla, so basically its been 9 months of me waiting for him...and I feel its been tooooooo much you know for him to figure out a way to bring us there so we constantly have fights over the phone of me telling him how tired i am of waiting....I know..everyone tells me that he never wanted a family, but I dont think thats true, I told him that at least I needed to know what is going on.. how much money he is saving etc things to make me feel positive he is like i handle my bussiness you handle yours...so after one month of misery of fights I blame him ..he blames my behavior for things not to work because he says how can he build things under this negative enviroment with your "constant attacks" this is his favorite expression lately...... I broke up with him 3 days ago...because I cant live anymore like this, without knowing what is going to happen and when...the sad part is that he doesnt realize that...i am so hurtfull and I get so frustrated that I get out of control and call him and just blackout on him and then he takes my behaviors and turn them around and say you see...I cant live with a person like this bla bla bla..you make my life miserable etc etc and he doesnt realize that is because of the situation HE puts me trough witht this distance and not knowing what is the plan.even if he told me is in 6 months because this, and this need to happen but he doesnt say nothing and when I say something about it he is like YOU ARE ATTACKING ME ., so im really sad..really scared...really frustrated knowing that...he is the victim you know...he is no looking for me since I broke up and also i know he is not even scared to loose me because I always break up w him and call him to continue arguing to try to make him understand im like this because of this horrible life he is putting me trough, I feel this was a scam, I feel he lied to me,I feel fooled I waited for so long I had so much patience to wait for him but he doesnt seem to do what he has to do, so after all the waiting I didnt have my family anyway..I will have to walk out of this empty handed and it was my fault according to him is what kills me the most....kills me inside...he manipulates every situation so he ends up being the victim...so what should I do...try to work things out?, keep waiting and be super sweet so he comes closer to me and feels encouraged about us...should I not answer the phone for a month at least (I always try to do it but I always call him ) to make him feel he lost me... I have been crying so much this last month..remember I have a baby w him...or should I just disapear w the baby so he realizes what he lost us? or should I let him talk to him ..This guy feels too safe about me you know..he feels im going to wait for ever and i will never have the strenght to walk away I think that s why he is doing things on his own pace...I have to make him feel he can loose us for good..Pls help me..i know this was a long story so I appreciate the ones who made it till here

please give me advice i dont know what to do?

thanks and bless