sparkle & fade Posted July 31, 2006 Posted July 31, 2006 Thanks for reading! If on Friday, almost at midnite, your BF tells you that he doesnt have to work on Monday because he has vacation for 2 weeks but failing to tell you anything about it until that moment? Knowing that one has to put in advanced notice to take a two week vacation from work. So, basically keeping that bit of information to himself for at least a week,if not longer and telling you only because there was a situation in which it was necessary for it to be brought up, otherwise, you get the feeling that it would have never been brought up? Does anyone feel like that was a bit disrespectful? Rude? Normal? Tell me how you would feel if you have been with your BF of 2 years, you live together, and sharing a life with one another and he went and did this to you.
laRubiaBonita Posted July 31, 2006 Posted July 31, 2006 i agree, i would feel left out of his life.... which i thought i was quite important in. but men are different than women in the whys and hows of the communication, or lack there of. what was his reasoning for not mentioning it until now? although i might think he waited so that i would not take time off then too.
Author sparkle & fade Posted July 31, 2006 Author Posted July 31, 2006 i agree, i would feel left out of his life.... which i thought i was quite important in. Thats what I am concerned about....why the blatant need to leave me out of the loop? Whats the deal? what was his reasoning for not mentioning it until now? Thats just it, he didnt state a reason. I asked him why he didnt think to tell me that bit of info until now, and he said "i did already" which is such an over the top lie, I didnt know what to say...I insisted he didnt....believe me, I would definately have known if he did....he basically backed down and didnt have much to say, because he knew he was wrong, wrong, wrong....and of course I dropped it, because he was being quite evasive, and I realized that I wasnt going to get any kind of a solid answer out of him other than vague mumblings and "i did"... although i might think he waited so that i would not take time off then too. Strange because I told him I was going to take a day off to spend with him and he insisted that I didnt....what the f ever, I really dont care at this point if he is cheating on me, really I dont...but what is more worrisome is why he feels its necessary to leave me out of things like that....its scary, if you ask me.
a4a Posted July 31, 2006 Posted July 31, 2006 You just posted many many many more red flags...... be on alert and prepared to deal with the matter. Is he leaving town or planning a short trip during his time off without you? Perhaps you should just take a day off without telling him... it is your right to do so.
bab Posted July 31, 2006 Posted July 31, 2006 I was going to say that there is a decent possibility that he honestly thought he told you. But then I read this: Strange because I told him I was going to take a day off to spend with him and he insisted that I didnt....what the f ever, I really dont care at this point if he is cheating on me, really I dont...but what is more worrisome is why he feels its necessary to leave me out of things like that....its scary, if you ask me. I can't reconcile why he might be against you taking a day off to spend with him. What are his plans for this 2 weeks? Have you asked? I could see if he didn't want you to take the whole 2 weeks off, but one day?? Are you in any type of financial crisis that would lead him to believe that taking a day off would be a bad idea? Do you not have vacation? I can't think of a good reason for this.
Author sparkle & fade Posted July 31, 2006 Author Posted July 31, 2006 You just posted many many many more red flags...... How so? Is he leaving town or planning a short trip during his time off without you? yes, how did you know?? trouble is, he could wait until I got my vacation which is only a month or so down the road...but for some reason cant....said he would wait but then it all changed fri nite, the first week staying here, the second week going away. Perhaps you should just take a day off without telling him... it is your right to do so. yeah, I could, but thats not the point...the point is and has always been the blatant dishonesty and lack of respect. I was just checking with you guys to see if that would be something that would piss you off too, seeing on how my perception is quite marred...
laRubiaBonita Posted July 31, 2006 Posted July 31, 2006 well this would be a perfect time to move out.... if the need presents itself! do a little redecorating (if you know what i mean)....
basscatcher Posted July 31, 2006 Posted July 31, 2006 He's definetly hiding something he doesn't want you to find out about.. Geeze if I had 2 weeks off I would love to spend my vacation time with my SO. Even if my SO had 2 weeks off I would expect him to spend most of it with me if I had the ability too. Sounds like he is thinking about himself more then you or your relationship. I have a hunch he is up to something and doesn't want you to know about it.? Do you know where he is going on his week away? and with whom? What the purpose? Why wont he let you have one day with him during his vacation time? Is he planning to move out on you while your at work? Then disappear on you for the second week so you have time to adjust and calm down before he comes back to town? This has my head running rampant.. ... Too many weird and unanswered questions... He's up to something.. Not good...
a4a Posted July 31, 2006 Posted July 31, 2006 How so? ahhhh....... he neglects to tell you or include you.....shows he probably is not all that interested in having you around during his vacation time. That is not what people do when they care about the person they are with. yes, how did you know?? trouble is, he could wait until I got my vacation which is only a month or so down the road...but for some reason cant....said he would wait but then it all changed fri nite, the first week staying here, the second week going away. Big red flag.... my guess is he is attempting to put distance between you and he regardless if there is another in his life or not. yeah, I could, but thats not the point...the point is and has always been the blatant dishonesty and lack of respect. I was just checking with you guys to see if that would be something that would piss you off too, seeing on how my perception is quite marred... This would more than simply piss me off if it was what I considered to be a serious relationship and my bf played the role of it being a serious relationship. My guess is you need to be prepared to exit this situation (redecorate if you choose to ) ? for you...... you stated you don't care if he is cheating on you. You really don't? If not that is a good indicator that your R is over regardless.... if so then I would not care if he went on an unannounced vacation or not.
selenakitten Posted July 31, 2006 Posted July 31, 2006 yeah, I would be ticked off too. My husband's work doesn't put out a weekly schedule...at least not most of the time. He has to call the night before to see when he has to come in, and that really makes me mad b/c we can't plan anything!!!!!
abitconfused Posted August 1, 2006 Posted August 1, 2006 Pretty F*up. I would say while he is away take everything and run. He obviously has lost interest in you and does not have the balls to break up. He would probably blame the whole thing on you. But are you kidding me. Hey hunny surprize I have too weeks off and we are going to...... insted you got hunny I have 2 weeks off and I am going away without you. Sucks.
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