principessa17 Posted July 29, 2006 Posted July 29, 2006 I am 27 years old, and he is 21. I have no idea how our love story could start with such a large age difference between us, but it did. The beginnings were quite a challenge and we broke up several times over trivial things. With every breakup though, our love grew stronger and we found ourselves gravitating back towards each other and seeking ocassions to meet or talk. Time passed and we fell deeper in love. His friends love to see us together, while almost none of mine approve of the relationship. I can think of a million reasons why people may think we have no future together, but for some reason we can't stay apart from each other for long. On Tuesday we broke up once again, and I am not sure whether this time it is forever. My mind says that I need to get him out of my mind and refocus, especially that next year I hope to start my MBA in another state. This would be perfect timing, I would have one year to forget him. But can I? I love him so much. I am also convinced he loves me enormously, but he occasionally goes through the need to validate his manliness and enjoys other girls' attention. I think it is the age - I, too, was rather unpredictable and adventureous when I was 20. I do not understand it though. When I walk into a room, he cannot take his eyes away from me and he feels my every move even when he cannot see me. Then how is it that sometimes he needs to talk to other girls? The reason we broke up is that he received a loving message from a girl in another state. I have no way of knowing if only the girl is pursuing him, or if he responds to her in any way. While he was asleep, I asked his sister to translate the message for me (it was in another language) and it ended with "I love you" and her name. I picked up my things and left. The next day I did not call him, and neither did he. One day later, he left me a voice mail saying that we needed to separate because no one had given me the right to check his messages. The only reason I had asked his sister to translate that text message was that he did not want to do it when I asked him to. It has been 4 days since then, and I never replied to his voice message, nor did I write. Please let me know your thoughts, I would so much appreciate your replies! Thank you so much! Principessa
burning 4 revenge Posted July 29, 2006 Posted July 29, 2006 my thought is your age difference is nothing. if you were 37 it would be different, but six years is nothing. it's actually healthier from a biological perspective for the woman to be a few years older, because of the difference in male/female sexual peaks as for everything else, i don't know. if he's seeing this girl then maybe you should seperate, but if she's just infatuated, then why are you so defensive
P1xie Posted July 29, 2006 Posted July 29, 2006 It really isn't the age as much as the maturity level. I, too, was rather unpredictable and adventureous when I was 20 I think if you two were to be totally commited he would resent you later. He would feel like he missed out on something. He is still basically a kid. His actions wanting to hang out,talk to girls is normal for him to want. It wasn't that long ago that he was in highschool. Let him have his fun and experience life. If your love is so stong time will not break it.
Author principessa17 Posted July 29, 2006 Author Posted July 29, 2006 my thought is your age difference is nothing. if you were 37 it would be different, but six years is nothing. it's actually healthier from a biological perspective for the woman to be a few years older, because of the difference in male/female sexual peaks as for everything else, i don't know. if he's seeing this girl then maybe you should seperate, but if she's just infatuated, then why are you so defensive Thank you for your reply! I do not think I was defensive - I believe that he should have translated the message and explained why it was so romantic in nature. I can't pretend certain things don't bother me if they do. I was in his arms, watching TV when this message arrived and I asked him to translate it. I cannot understand why he chose not to translate it, unless he had something to hide. Do you think I should have acted differently and ignored the message? Looking forward to your reply. Thanks!
Author principessa17 Posted July 29, 2006 Author Posted July 29, 2006 It really isn't the age as much as the maturity level. I think if you two were to be totally commited he would resent you later. He would feel like he missed out on something. He is still basically a kid. His actions wanting to hang out,talk to girls is normal for him to want. It wasn't that long ago that he was in highschool. Let him have his fun and experience life. If your love is so stong time will not break it. Thanks for your reply! I agree with your arguments, but I am not sure how I can ignore when other girls flirt with him. I passed that age, and I am having a difficult time coping with the thought that they would be sending him romantic messages or pictures. I think you are entirely right that he will resent me later if I do not allow him to have fun, but what should I do? Overlook everything and just remember he loves me and not them? It's quite difficult. I look forward to your reply! Thank you so much!
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