Outcast Posted July 26, 2006 Posted July 26, 2006 Literally, he makes sure I am fed, that I have clean clothes on my back, that I some money in my pocket You could get that in prison. You are in an abusive relationship. This is not 'love' nor anything like it. It's servitude and whatever you tell yourself in your head to make it all right is going to see you to a violent end if you don't tell it to shut up and leave you alone. You need to get yourself away from this man. He's destroyed whatever you may have been and will continue until there's nothing left. Go read up about 'Safety plans' on abuse websites, make one, and go. Please. There are millions of men who will treat you better.
norajane Posted July 26, 2006 Posted July 26, 2006 strangeway, I looked up your other threads...and stopped reading when I got to this from your July 12th thread (http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t93461/): I am absolutely LIVID with this rage that cant be explained. It is like when you want to rip all your hair out. I can barely contain myself. I have been at this **** for 2 years, and it has come to this. Last nite, I wrote him a letter, explaining how I feel, about the whole anger/hitting thing. I brought up several key points. I asked many questions, one of which was if he thought he would ever lay a hand on me. NONE of this **** got answered. NONE of it....he read it, and promptly fell asleep. I kept asking him what his opinion was, what he thought of it all. Had NOTHING to say on the matter. AT ALL. In fact, it only made him mad that I was disturbing him. I took this to mean it was over, and started to initiate the break up conversation. This had an effect on him, but it was more like "stop pestering me with this ****". Finally, I was at my wits end and stood up, thanking him for his time. Thing is, it seems like it is over, as he wont even share an opinion about any of it at all and goes to any lengths to avoid any and all conversation with me about anything....but when I try to leave, I cant get the things that I need to leave. For example, my car keys, or my cell phone, or other somewhat important (and very important) things. He hides these things, but refuses to actively participate in a relationship with me. Someone help me, I am near hysterical tears right now. It seems like he wants me to leave, but he wont give me the tools necessary to do just that. I am living in limbo, and it is tearing me apart. Sweets, you need to get away from this man immediately. No if's, and's or but's about it. You are in an abusive relationship. There is a lot of help out there for women in your situation, although I'm afraid I don't have experience with it and don't know where to direct you. Perhaps some of the other posters here can do so. If nothing else, please talk to a trusted friend to help you get out of this.
blind_otter Posted July 26, 2006 Posted July 26, 2006 No, it is nothing bad, he doesnt hit, I am not locked up, I cant explain it, and dont want to get into it really, I just was actually wondering if anyone had ever dealt with a person like this before, and if so, what happened, and did they have a mental problem, and do these things just take time to work out? I had a partner who acted like that. Distant. Wouldn't answer questions. Sometimes he would be really nice, but it became a rarer and rarer occurance. And the relationship became abusive. He began pushing me, shoving me, spitting in my face. Because I tolerated his disrespectful behavior when it was benign, he took it further and became physically abusive. This is my experience with a man who acted like that, I had to end the relationship.
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