unfinite Posted July 24, 2006 Posted July 24, 2006 Since we broke up we've been talking online and are still really good friends. We both want to hang out together but she doesnt want to actually meet me because of her new boyfriend. He thinks it wrong for her to be friends with me because I'm her ex, and is putting restrictions on what she can and can't do. When we were still going out, she was with him while I was on vacation and I guess never thought that I didn't like her alone with another guy. She's thinking that for him though and I don't know why the suddden change? I told her that she has nothing to worry about...that he should trust her enought to hang out with someone else. What should I say to her to convince her to forget what she thinks her boyfriend doesn't want, and just have some fun?
Winfield Posted July 24, 2006 Posted July 24, 2006 Say nothing. To put it bluntly, of course she doesn't want to meet you in person...because she's got another guy to go out with now! I think the friendship you have with her at present is as far as it's going to get - communication via an online source. She may say she wants to meet in person, etc, but she's only saying it without any intention of actually doing something about it! The warning signs were there when you were on vacation - she was with another man! Why didn't this occur to you at the time? She was / is playing you... She's thinking along the lines of not hanging out with you when she's with her current man because she probably wants to go out in public with him (and only him), therefore won't want to hang out with other guys. For example, what would you think if you were on a night out on the town with some buddies, and (by chance) saw your girlfriend out on the town too, only, instead of being out with her female buddies, she was with another guy? In short, she cheated on you - and unfortunatley for you, she seems happy with what she's got for now. Don't make yourself as available to her (ie, suggest a night out), because all she'll do is play with your feelings, stringing you along further... Good luck!
Author unfinite Posted July 24, 2006 Author Posted July 24, 2006 I find it weird how since I'm her ex, we're not allowd to be together. I know more about her than anyone else, she knows more about me than anyone else. We get along, we have fun together...we should be best friends. If being her ex doesn't have any benifits, I resign my posistion and would like to be just friends. lol I don't get it, there are stupid little rules that everyone has to follow but no one wants to, but most people do. I'm not saying that cheating or whatever is allowd, but if her and I both want to do something, there shouldn't be some weird force that says "thats inappropriate".
Winfield Posted July 24, 2006 Posted July 24, 2006 I find it weird how since I'm her ex, we're not allowd to be together. I know more about her than anyone else, she knows more about me than anyone else. We get along, we have fun together...we should be best friends. If being her ex doesn't have any benifits, I resign my posistion and would like to be just friends. lol I don't get it, there are stupid little rules that everyone has to follow but no one wants to, but most people do. I'm not saying that cheating or whatever is allowd, but if her and I both want to do something, there shouldn't be some weird force that says "thats inappropriate". Well, sorry for wasting my time in giving my take on your situation! But, unless there's more to your story than what you've written in your original post, I'd say you're in danger of being walked all over by her...
Recommended Posts