girlfriendisanescort Posted July 24, 2006 Posted July 24, 2006 OK so I've been dating a really nice girl for 10 weeks and things have been going well. She is beautiful, funny and all in all I couldn't really ask for anything more. She's 27, I'm 26. However, about a week or so ago she started acting slightly strange, nothing too weird but enough that I noticed something. Anyway, we have a talk and she gets upset and I'm not exactly sure why. She says its personal and doesn't want to talk about it so I don't pressure her. Then Friday evening we decide to meet up for a drink and a chat. I can see she is stressing over something so ask her what the matter is. Long story short she tells me she's been stressing over having to tell me something. I think "she cheated on me", "she's actually a man", "she doesn't want to be with me anymore" etc etc and then she whips out " I'm actually an escort". Well, needless to say I was a little taken a back. I didn't know what to feel and in all honesty I still don't know what I feel. She explained her reasons for doing this which I can fully understand. I am not someone who judges people by the things they do without considering why they do them and so knowing her, her back ground and her current situation I understand and in a strange way even respect her for doing something like this to get out of the position she is in. She works 1 day a month or something liek that. So in essence I'm not against Escorts or people who chose this way of life but I never thought I would ever be dating one. I asked her if she intended to continue and she yes she has to for another year as she needs to get out of her financial mess (paying for studies etc) which again I understand and know to be true. She is in a low paying job and she really is short of money. She has looked at lots of other ways to earn cash but I guess none come near to the earing potential of an escort. Here is my problem....I don't know if I can stay with her knowing that she will do this type of work. The very idea of another man touching her let alone all the other stuff makes my blood boil. She says it is only work and means nothing to her but I am a little old fashioned and put a lot of value in the fact that when I'm with someone I'm only with them. So I've been thinking about this for 3 days. First thought was break things off as i don't want to be with someone who does this. If you'd have asked me if I could have dated someone who'd been a escrot let a lone a current escort I'd have laughed the idea off as ridiculous. But now I know her, and see her as a person who I feel a lot for, I don't know what to do. I thought about what it would be like to be without her and I can't really imagine it. We get on so well and I really thougth there was a future for us. But again I keep coming back to the idea of someone else touching her. Looking at it logically she is correct, it is only work and at the end she comes home to me and its me she loves. I thought about telling her I couldn't be with ehr physically while she does this and so maybe we take a break, keep in touch and then see when she has done what she has to do. So what are peoples thoughts please? Could you live with the thought? Any comments welcome!
LikkleMissConfused Posted July 24, 2006 Posted July 24, 2006 it is obvious you like her a lot and I think this will turn you into an emotional wreck if you carry on. Too be honest, if you are going to do work like this you can't expect to be in a relationship. I mean would you be in a relationship with someone if they were an escort???? It will be hard for you but a lot easier now than the long run. You will end up resenting her for what she does? But is she a clean escort, or the other type that offers extra services. I know here there are such things as clean escorts fo rrich older men. I have been hired on that basis to attend events. And there is nothing dirty or seedy about that. Think about it but if I was you go with your heart.
JamesM Posted July 24, 2006 Posted July 24, 2006 I kinda think his use of the word escort means she offers extra services. But the question is good.... Would you have dated her if you knew she was an escort? Could I? No. I know too much what escorts do. And no, it isn't just work. You have to enjoy work to make it appear real. Yes, she may love you, but from what I have read and heard (from escorts), it is hard to break from the business...easy money, attention, and yes, sex. If you know after only ten weeks, I would consider moving on. STDs are more common than she wants you to think in the escort business. She is putting you at risk as well.
AwkwardMan Posted July 25, 2006 Posted July 25, 2006 I would leave her. Maybe I would hire her once a month after though.
lilbabe Posted July 25, 2006 Posted July 25, 2006 This really is a tough one. My question to you is, Do you love her? If you do then this is a whole different ball game. If you love her and think you have a future with this girl, then you better figure something out and do it fast. You are like most men in the fact that you can stand to think of someone else touching her. If you can't live with her current career choice, then you have to help her figure out some other means of financial freedom. Either help her find another part-time job or take one yourself and help her out. After only 10 weeks, she may not feel comfortable taking anything from you, so you may have to give her the choice. Either do this or you have to walk away.
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