Guest Posted July 18, 2006 Posted July 18, 2006 If I was to ever get a letter from my MM about what he could offer me I guess this is what it would say...... 1. THE LOOK 2. The occasional touch 3. Phone calls 4. The occasional 'I love you' (I will probably say this a day or two before the sexual act, but you won't notice because you are so in awe of me) 5. Sexual favours 6. Dirty pictures on the mobile This is what I cannot offer you... 1. Nights in front of the fire 2. All night to hold you 3. Flowers 4. Cards 5. Holidays and walks on the sand 6. Shopping (on our own) 7. Meal at the end of the day 8. Baths together 9. Cooking together 10. Sharing stories in the kitchen at night 11. Pillow fights 12. Watching films or even boring programmes together 13. Putting the kids to bed, then cuddling under the duvet in the front room 14. FALLING ASLEEP TOGETHER AND WAKING UP TOGETHER BECAUSE ALL OF THE ABOVE ARE RESERVED FOR THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON IN MY LIFE, AND I AM SORRY TO SAY THAT IS NOT YOU, THAT IS MY WIFE!!!!
Guest Posted July 19, 2006 Posted July 19, 2006 Who are you? The BS or the OW? I don't get it! I get alot from my MM. If you are the BS this list just is to make you feel good--not accurate in a lot of cases!
stillhere Posted July 19, 2006 Posted July 19, 2006 I've gotten all in the first part, and some of the second part. He pays part of my bills, plus gives me spending money for gas and such. Flowers, we have taken relaxing dips in his whirlpool, and sat in front of the fire. And he tells me every day that he loves me. I get kisses every day at work, he's gotten more and more brave. But for the most part, his W gets the rest of his attention, well conversation anyways. I get all of his emotional aspects, she is just a room mate that he occasionally falls asleep next to. So true, but i try not to think of it..........i spend the rest of the night crying. I'm not happy with the situation, but i'm tolerating it for now. Very much unlike me, but there is no on and off switch for my feelings.
Last Mohegan Posted July 19, 2006 Posted July 19, 2006 This post is SOOOOOOO from a betrayed spouse!!! Its so obvious! Especially number 4..."the occasional I love you before hte sexual act"...please. Believe it "guest"...the MM gives a whole lot more than that to the OW and tells the OW far more than you will ever know about him through your entire marriage. If I was to ever get a letter from my MM about what he could offer me I guess this is what it would say...... 1. THE LOOK 2. The occasional touch 3. Phone calls 4. The occasional 'I love you' (I will probably say this a day or two before the sexual act, but you won't notice because you are so in awe of me) 5. Sexual favours 6. Dirty pictures on the mobile This is what I cannot offer you... 1. Nights in front of the fire 2. All night to hold you 3. Flowers 4. Cards 5. Holidays and walks on the sand 6. Shopping (on our own) 7. Meal at the end of the day 8. Baths together 9. Cooking together 10. Sharing stories in the kitchen at night 11. Pillow fights 12. Watching films or even boring programmes together 13. Putting the kids to bed, then cuddling under the duvet in the front room 14. FALLING ASLEEP TOGETHER AND WAKING UP TOGETHER BECAUSE ALL OF THE ABOVE ARE RESERVED FOR THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSON IN MY LIFE, AND I AM SORRY TO SAY THAT IS NOT YOU, THAT IS MY WIFE!!!!
GreenEyedLady Posted July 19, 2006 Posted July 19, 2006 If the most important person in a cheaters life was his wife, then why would she be treated so disrespectfully? BS, you are narcissistic, the world does not revolve around you. If you were wise, you would realize that the most important person in a cheaters life is HIMSELF!
Blind Illusion Posted July 19, 2006 Posted July 19, 2006 I'm not sure about anyone else, but if I had all these nights in front of the fire after cooking together in the kitchen and sharing stories, baths and night long caresses, I'd have to be SuperWoman to have all this excess time and desire for yet another person. Then again, I wouldn't need nor want another person, either.
Butterflying Posted July 19, 2006 Posted July 19, 2006 I agree with everyone else this post is from a BS. I have very good friend who has been involved with a MM for several years. I think it's been going at least four years. They live in different states. They both travel a lot. And they see each other almost once a week. He bought the condo that she lives in. The deed is in her name. They actually do spend nights and weekends together. He gives her a lot of money because she's living a luxurious lifestyle, and she only works part-time. She seems happy. She never complains about wanting more, or needing to spend holidays with him. Honestly, her relationship with this MM is far better than any relationship I've ever seen. They have arguments just like anyone else. But they make up. From what I can see, this relationship will go on forever as long as neither of them want more, or less. After all these years, I'm sure if the wife wants to know about them, she could. Maybe she doesn't care. Either way, nobody should underestimate the pros and cons of an affair. The facts can be surprising.
Guest Posted July 19, 2006 Posted July 19, 2006 Who are you? The BS or the OW? I don't get it! I get alot from my MM. If you are the BS this list just is to make you feel good--not accurate in a lot of cases! I am not the BS, I am a married OW trying to justify why I should let my MM go. I socialise with my partner with the MM and his wife, so the "occasional touch" is when we are all together. I love my MM and some days he is constantly in my thoughts, but I am trying to rationalise that the pain I feel is not worth the few moments we get together. And yes, I do agree with an earlier post that the MM is a selfish person and in it for himself. He is the most important person to himself. He does not do most of the second list with his wife, but he still stays there. And the lady with the condo bought for her by the MM...well that is ok if she is happy with it, but he only bought it for selfish reasons because for whatever reason he is staying with his wife. It is time we all woke up and realised that we should come first. I make excuses for him all the time about why we can't be together, but bottom line is, he is never going to leave because he doesn't want it enough.
Meaplus3 Posted July 19, 2006 Posted July 19, 2006 If the most important person in a cheaters life was his wife, then why would she be treated so disrespectfully? BS, you are narcissistic, the world does not revolve around you. If you were wise, you would realize that the most important person in a cheaters life is HIMSELF! I have to agree with GreenEyedLady here the most important person in a cheaters life is himself/herself!! I have learned so much about myself and MM from our affair. The biggest realization to me was that if I truely loved my husband and he truely loved his wife than neither of us would have been so selfish as to start an affair in the first place. I now think about how selfish I and he have been. The lying, sneaking and cheating a major betrayel to our spouses and everlasting damage to our marriages and all for what? A little pick me up and feel good? So not WORTH it!
owcanbhppy Posted July 19, 2006 Posted July 19, 2006 in my situation, i spend alot of days & nights w/ mm. have received flowers, cards, candy & trips. i recipicate as i can, i'm happy to do so. i never expected ever to be ow, but i'm very happy in the relationship. i don't understand exactly where things changed that i could do this, but i REALLY don't understand why any one would continue w/ a mm that treated them like crap. even when you get several nights/week w/ mm, there's still the 'wait' time. i don't understand waiting to be treated in a way that makes you feel bad. jmo
Recommended Posts