sickkitty Posted July 17, 2006 Posted July 17, 2006 so guys just a thought has any one on this board wanted 2 get even with their ex's or has went on a revenge rampage? Ne storys or ideas on how they'd like to or have got back at there ex???? Im currently plotting my revenge and u no what they say................ "Revenge is a dish best served cold" Amanda x
Smung Posted July 17, 2006 Posted July 17, 2006 Yes by moving on and enjoying life with new friends! Revenge is pointless... Showing the person you are very happy without them should be reward enough for you.
Author sickkitty Posted July 17, 2006 Author Posted July 17, 2006 What happened that makes you want revenge? Read my thread " 2 weeks and hes learning her language" Im one of those ppl who has 2 get back at some one the thing is about break ups is it hurts like hell u can get over that ull always find some one better out there " there a lid for every jar" But i have been humiliated by this person and had a massive kick in the teeth so i believe in "an eye for an eye" Not quite sure what im gonna do or when im gonna do it :o/ Amanda x
littlekitty Posted July 17, 2006 Posted July 17, 2006 I'm not sure that taking revenge on your ex will bring you any relief or happiness. And the people whom you are apparently humiliated infront of, won't necessarily think anymore of you because you take revenge, personally I'd probably think less of you.
LucreziaBorgia Posted July 17, 2006 Posted July 17, 2006 Ah, ok. I did see that thread. Revenge only works when the other person has some sort of emotional vulnerablity that you can exploit, and hurt them with it. Revenge is about taking something from the person that they want or preventing them from persuing it. I don't see any emotional vulnerabilities there - he shut you out emotionally and is with someone else, and I don't see anything you can take - there's no way you could break these two up really. Anything you say/do isn't likely to have any effect. It sounds like he has moved on and the only effect anything you do would have would be to irritate them rather than hurt them in any way. It sounds like he's pretty cold natured as far as guys go in how he handled your breakup and when someone has their mind set like he does there's little you can do. I'm sorry you found yourself on this end of things, and sorry about the way he treated you - but honestly, the best revenge of all is to live well yourself. Show him how insignificant he is by moving on. Remember how insignificant you felt when he moved on like he did? Well, time to do the same yourself. Find someone who makes him insignificant in your life. Someone who is like emotional white-out to blot him and the pain he caused you out of your life. It won't be easy, and I expect you'll harbor your hurt for a while and turn it into anger, but hopefully with time the anger will subside and thoughts of revenge will turn to thoughts of yourself and finding your own happiness in the aftermath.
Outcast Posted July 17, 2006 Posted July 17, 2006 Revenge is taking poison and hoping the other person will die. It's pointless, never gets you what you want, and makes you appear less in people's eyes. It is neither powerful nor admirable. It's petty and low.
junkboy Posted July 17, 2006 Posted July 17, 2006 Personally I think that revenge is more hurtful to the person doing it then the person receiving it. By getting revenge you are not only solitifying his reasons for leaving you, but you are showing him that you have feelings for him. The best thing to do is to not give him any attention what so ever. The worst thing to do to anyone is to ignore them.
2020vision Posted July 17, 2006 Posted July 17, 2006 Of course I have...I think I even created a thread about it. I have a mutual friend of my ex's new g/f and was going to let her in on the fact that he had been calling me confessing his undying love...Well, I got put in my place, and more importantly, the right place. It would have done more damage to me then him, and I would have somehow been portrayed as the infamous "psycho ex". That is a role I do not want to play, and you should not either. Its natural to have thoughts like this, but I hope yours passes. You need to look forward, to a brighter happier future. Not of ill thoughts. If your ex did you that wrong where you feel you need revenge, then trust me, he will get whats coming to him without your influence. Best Wishes, 2020
Shane361 Posted July 17, 2006 Posted July 17, 2006 I am not sure what exactly happen. But if your one to take revenge then you have the issues. Maybe he just thought you were crazy or something. Ever thought about trying out for a soap opera? Maybe you should write a book. Regardless...you will only be asking for drama unless you be a real woman and get over the pain and move on. Is he really worth it? Did he rape your mom or something? If it was that bad then maybe you would need to involve the cops..if not..then grow up and move on. Physcho..-Shane
cubbbb Posted July 18, 2006 Posted July 18, 2006 The only thing you will do is erase any good memories he had of you, and validate any of his actions. He won't look back at you with regrets and "what ifs", and feel bad about any of the things he did wrong. He will just remember you as a vindictive bitch and others will see you as pretty much the same. I had an ex (who I dumped because her "issues" were becoming very clear) who has did the "revenge" game, and it only made me think of her as phsychotic, and made me feel very very thankful I shut the door on her and never looked back. Believe me, you won't get the reaction that your looking for. When I think about it, you and my ex seem to share a few personality traits!
Author sickkitty Posted July 18, 2006 Author Posted July 18, 2006 Cheers 4 the advice guys, u no u get that spur of the moment thing that was me yesterday, im on that angry stage when i just want 2 get some satisfaction out of this but i now im the end it will only cause me more pain and sadness Love sucks Amanda x
Teacher's Pet Posted July 18, 2006 Posted July 18, 2006 Amanda, I know how you feel. Since day ONE of my breakup, I wanted revenge. I knew exactly what to do. My revenge would hurt her relationship with her own family, and possibly have consequences in her career. It would be so SIMPLE to pull it off, and 100% legal. When I was in my "angry stage", I came within one phone call of doing it, and was talked out of it by my best friend. Trust me, I think about it a lot. If it makes you feel any better, try to "play out" the scenario of going ahead with your revenge in your mind, but DONT ACTUALLY DO IT. If you must, enjoy the feeling knowing you CAN do it if you absolutely HAD to, but don't do it. The others are right. It will just make YOU look bad in the end. Trust me, I'm still completely miserable over my breakup, but I just can't get myself to "get even". -tp
Author sickkitty Posted July 18, 2006 Author Posted July 18, 2006 Thanx TP, i just feel so alone right now my friends r *******s the only good friend i have doesnt leave any where near me i just get so dwn talking 2 ppl helps its the worst when i wake up and when i go 2 bed i used 2 look 4ward 2 my wk ends no i dread them especially sundays (thats when i found out he was seeing this other girl) it hurts so much i just want the pain to stop how long since ur relationship broke up TP? Amanda x
Teacher's Pet Posted July 18, 2006 Posted July 18, 2006 Amanda, My breakup was on 6/19 (4 weeks ago yesterday), and we've had NC since 6/25. It's been so rough for me, my sleeping has been off, my appetite has been coming and going, I've been a total zombie at work, it just sucks. Trust me, it's taken a LOT for me not to "take revenge", but the more I think about it, the more I know the potential consequences might not be worth it for me. The way I look at it, my ex gf should thank my best friend for me not ruining her life, because at one point, I was ready to do it, but was talked out of it. Something about "bad karma", and all that spiritual stuff. Amanda, don't feel alone. All of us here are going through some kind of related grief over a relationship. We're here to help each other. If you'd like to talk sometime, feel free to send me a private message on here. You can never have too many friends, right? Hang in there. -tp
cubbbb Posted July 18, 2006 Posted July 18, 2006 Good choice sickkitty! Your making the right choice. You can actually get revenge on him in a POSITIVE way.. There are many ways you can go about this. For example (I'm 33) I bought a nautilus machine and stairmaster and lost 25 pounds of fat, gained about 10 pounds of muscle, rewarded myself with new clothes, and worked on my social skills among other women. I always had a hard time approaching women, but with my "high school" physique back I am much more confident and the results have been amazing. My cell phone is loaded with phone numbers of women that I have met since, and I am enjoying the single life. There are so many things you can now do, that you can't when your in a relationship. I'm not saying its better to be single, but you don't have to sit in a depressive state, when there is nothing holding you back now. A gym membership only cost 20 or 30 bucks, and your self confidence will go thru the roof when you look at yourself in the mirror and smile! Not to mention its a great way to meet people. Believe me, the "new you" will get back to the ex. He may see you out, and say "Wow" to himself, and start kicking himself for ever dumping you! Or his friends will see you, and let him know how great your looking, and how happy you seem! This will drive him crazy! Thats sweet "positive" revenge! There are many other ways you can do this. Do things that will make you happy. Maybe change jobs if your stuck in a "dead end" non satisfying job. Get yourself a whole new set of friends and kick all those deadbeat friends that you mentioned having to the curb. Even if your tore up inside, don't give him the satisfaction of letting him know that he phased you a bit. If he see's you grieving, looking all pitiful, pathetically begging for him back, showing your jealous side, it won't do nothing but give him an ego boost. Rip apart his over inflated ego by making it appear that your so much happier without him. Maybe some others here can mention some of their "Positive" revenge tactics.
Author sickkitty Posted July 18, 2006 Author Posted July 18, 2006 Thanx TP that helps alot, i 2 believe in karma what ever u do will come back x3 im glad i signed up on this board it helps me get through the day alot faster its nice to b able to talk 2 others going through the same as me doesnt seem that im alone U r a very caring person TP and ur advice is spot on I wish u alot of happeness in ur life, u deserve it Amanda x
Teacher's Pet Posted July 18, 2006 Posted July 18, 2006 Wow, Amanda... Thank you so much for your kind words. You showed me more appreciation in that short post than my ex did in 6+ months of dating. You've just given me MY ego boost for the day. If I actually got some real sleep last night, I'd be at the gym right now working on my other ego boost. I would LOVE for my ex to see "the new me", once I achieve the body I'm working on. Yes, I have a LOT of work ahead of me, but the way I look at it, when I was with my ex, I'd sleep over her house 4-5 nights a week, and since she lives so far from my gym (especially with traffic!), I'd never make it to the gym in time to get in a good workout before work. It's taken me a while, but I realized that without her, at least I have more time to workout, get myself looking (yes, I'll say it) HOT, and yes, make her jealous one day. And even if I never make her jealous, I'll be so busy meeting new people that I won't care! :) I guess it's all a matter of taking charge of your own destiny, and not let someone unworthy of your love do it for you! Have a GREAT day!! -tp
Author sickkitty Posted July 18, 2006 Author Posted July 18, 2006 Thanx cubbbb, u r so right babe iv aready lost 6lbs from not eating well im starting the gym at the end of the month (funny enough the same one as him)lol he has no idea how unhappy i am whenever he talks to me he always asks "how im doing" (probably hoping il start crying and begging) but im stronger than that il always say im fine and happy in my self (even if im not) i will not show him that he has got 2 me or that him and his new piece off ar$e has won coz they havent, at the end of the say his new relationship is a secret 2 everyone coz he is ashamed and he still wants me 4 sex (yeah right) so what does that say about her!!! im angry right now but that will pass and il get over this he on the other hand will always b a loser xx Thanx guys 4 all ur advice Amanda x
ButtonPusher Posted July 18, 2006 Posted July 18, 2006 My perfect revenge for my ex, would be to have her see me in her s*ithole city with a gorgeous stick thin blonde girl on my arm. My ex had an issue with skinny beautiful women and always feared me running off with one. ****ING BITCH WHORE R******N!!!!!!!!!!!!
Teacher's Pet Posted July 18, 2006 Posted July 18, 2006 LOL BP... My ex always was rough on herself about her weight, even though I always thought she had a good body..... Maybe one day I can bring a stick-thin woman around her so I can say "You know, for once, we agree on something. YOU'RE FAT!" LOL I could never, EVER do this. Now it's time for me to drag MY fat ass to work. Hang in there, guys! -tp
Author sickkitty Posted July 18, 2006 Author Posted July 18, 2006 Ur more than welcome TP and u sound like a great guy, seem like ur ex will be missing out in the long run im sure ur ex will get her comeupance just like mine will!!! i take graet comfort in nowing that there are sum fantastic ppl on this board like ur self how will help each other get through these hard times My love to every one who feels like sh*t right now Amanda Thanx again TP x
Teacher's Pet Posted July 19, 2006 Posted July 19, 2006 Thanks again, hon I should be really miserable now (my ex is at the Bon Jovi concert without me as we speak), but you've made me smile. -tp
Brittanyjean06 Posted July 19, 2006 Posted July 19, 2006 Try not to wish the worst amongst your ex's. For your karma will be 3x worse than what you hope for them. Try to think positive and know that what comes around goes around. And hopefully when this happens they will think of you and go through this life lesson and actually learn something from it. It's really easy for us to hope for the worst especially when were in pain and they're happy. Just eats you up inside! I do believe what comes around goes around I am very much a victim of it lol and have been a witness It also makes us feel better at the time, but the only thing we really should be concerned with is how we are going to move on and benefit from this Painful experience.
Bazeballfreak011 Posted July 19, 2006 Posted July 19, 2006 Revenge is pointless. By doing stuff to get back to ur ex, shows them they still have you. They know they still have ur around and ur craving for attention from them. Whether its the truth or not is beyond anyones knowledge but your own. The honest best revenge is being happy. Do things you've always wanted. Do stuff your ex wouldn't. Ever heard that song, "She let herself go?" That's what it comes down to. Make them wonder what your doing. I'm doing some changes in my life. I'm starting to go to the gym. I'm even gettin a tattoo . Making a few changes in my life. Next after that is a car lol. What goes around relaly comes around. My ex screwed me over, started dating someone else, their relationship just got screwed up too. Karma is a bitch lol.
Recommended Posts