When two people love each other, no matter what,they should always try to work it out

[bngo16]

I really love my girlfriend.I've never had a girl who considered her future with me & i feel the same way about her 2.She's been my best friend for 2 years & now I've lost her.We tend 2 fight once in a while but we always manage to forgive each other & talk things over.Last night she felt that I've been forcing myself 2 do things with her & that i didn't care about her.It was b/c 2 days ago on our day out she paid for lunch & i wanted to pay for the boat tour. But she got embarrassed when i said out loud that she paid for lunch & it's my turn 2 pay 4 the tour.We forgive each other & later on her friend invited us 2 dinner on sat (2 days from now) and i said i would go, but i didn't include her (gf) in my answer.She felt hurt b/c i knew she's working saturday & didn't consider her in my answer.I thought her friend has asked her already & didn't think her friend would ask me unless it was alright with my gf.She tells me she doesn't care about us nemore.what can i do?how can i interpret this? Thanks guys.

 

I know people will tell me to move on, but I'm finding it hard since everything just happened today. It's just last night before going to bed, she told me she was willing to forgive me for not including her in my answer to the saturday dinner. But this morning she just said she didn't care anymore about the relationship and packed up her things and left.

 

I acutually don't understand. How can she tell me that she would forgive me and we can work things through and then tell me the opposite when we wake up the next morning?

[norajane]

Wow, that's probably the most petty thing I've ever heard of to break up with someone she'd been with for two years. It hardly even sounds like a reason.

 

Either she hasn't cared about your relationship for a long time, she's met someone else, or she'll come running back full of remorse and 'forgiveness' for your supposed inconsideration of her feelings.

 

If I were you, don't contact her AT ALL. If she doesn't care about you, there's no point in clinging to the relationship and trying to talk to her...it will just make her think you are pathetic and push her away even more. If she does care about you, she needs to see what an ass she's being and apologize to you...but she needs to come to that realization on her own. You can't do anything to make her see that.

 

Either way, it doesn't sound like you did anything wrong at all, and if she thinks you did, she's really immature, and isn't likely to be able to handle your relationship when a real problem comes up.

 

How old is she? Is this her first relationship ever? She's coming off like a spoiled brat in your description of her...

[bngo16]

I forgot to mention tha we've been friends for two years, but we've only been together for a couple of months.

[norajane]

Ah, that's different...it really sounds like she's 'just not that into you.' She still sounds pretty petty and spoiled. I don't see why she would have anything to forgive if you accepted a dinner invitation even though she couldn't attend...are you not supposed to have a life unless she's right there with you?

 

You should be thankful that you discovered this petty and controlling side to her before getting in deeper. Or maybe the dinner thing was just an excuse to stop seeing you since she doesn't care anyway. Either way, you're better off without her.

 

I still believe the best way for you to get over this is to not have any contact with her. There's no point, and it sounds like any contact would probably just make you miserable.

[spinnelli]

Give a day or two to let her stew, pick up the phone, call her and ask her calmly to tell you what's up. Maybe she's angry at you, maybe she's angry at someone else and taking it out on you, maybe she's depressed, maybe she's immature, maybe she wants to break up...whatever..

 

Right now, you don't really know what's going on and before you make any decisions like "ignoring her and showing her who's boss", just ask her...sheesh

 

You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar. A relationship shouldn't be a power struggle. You love each other, talk to each other.

[BareGoddess]

I just wanted to comment on the title of your thread. I don't believe that no matter what, people who love each other should always try to work it out.

 

I was in a relationship (a marriage actually) where we loved each other deeply. But we could NEVER work anything out. We were like oil and water. It was doomed from the start. But we loved each other. Love doesn't conquer all.

 

You two might just be incompatible.

 

As for the situation you described: Your g/f is either incredibly immature or she was just looking for an excuse to get out anyway.

[Diver012]

The song is true, Sometimes Love isnt enough. People change and grow apart. Its tragic but it happens. It sounds like you made better best friends, than a couple. I would let it go.. her reasons sound incredibly shallow to me... more like an execuse.

 

I think that when a woman just isnt that into you, the little things that shouldnt matter, are over exagerated. She may want to be into you, she may feel like it on the surface, but when little things like this bothers her so much, to me it means the connection just wasnt that deep.

 

Sorry man, it sucks. It will be ok.