amerikajin Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 Feel free to ask a 'Why do women always/never....' question here. I'll start. Why do women say they're not jealous when they really are?
Tony T Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 Feel free to ask a 'Why do women always/never....' question here. I'll start. Why do women say they're not jealous when they really are? For the same reason they say they'd prefer to stay home and cook something when they'd much prefer to be taken to dine out! HA! Elementary stuff!
Author amerikajin Posted July 14, 2006 Author Posted July 14, 2006 Ah, good one Tone. And that reminds me... ...Why do modern women say that they are a 'traditional' woman, and that they want the guy to wine and dine them on the one hand, yet they don't want to cook and clean and be 'traditional' in that sense as well???
amaysngrace Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 ...Why do modern women say that they are a 'traditional' woman, and that they want the guy to wine and dine them on the one hand, yet they don't want to cook and clean and be 'traditional' in that sense as well??? I know you can cook dinner when you're being wined, but what's the point of cooking dinner if you're being dined?? PS I am so not a traditional woman!
VonDutch Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 I hate it when my boyfriend calls me jealous or asks me if I am jealous! I dont want to seem insecure or immature so Ill often say Im not... Ok last week I DID get VERY jealous and thought it was justified and when he asked me, I told him the truth, YES it makes me jealous when you call one of your female friends your number one girl, when Im sitting next to you.... As for the traditional woman thing, nope, thats not me :-) I think SOME women MAY have a tendency to not want to dissapoint a man, and therefore say/do things they THINK men want to hear/or have done, i.e. cooking dinner etc. But thats just not me :-)
My_Other_I Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 If you ever hear me saying that I'm a traditional woman and rather cook and clean, put me out of my misery. At that point I will have been out of my mind. As far as jealousy goes, I really don't get jealous. Now tell me where and who you've been with last night!
whichwayisup Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 Sometimes the mind says "I'm not jealous", but the heart feels the opposite. Also, bear in mind, where a woman is in her menstral cycle has abit to do with it as well...
blind_otter Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 AJ you are turning into a veritable Woggle II. All women indeed.....
Blackfrost Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 I'll add one here as well: "Why do the women who read romance-ish type novels (where the leading male is constantly tearing the womans clothes off and having his way with her at every other moment) say: ooo i loved this book, i would love to be taken like this all the time. As a man you decide to fulfill this for them, only to have them turn you down for sex because they're afraid of getting caught doing it outside, afraid of letting themselves completely do it with reckless abandon (i.e. hold back just a little bit) or get self concious or embarrased when something new or unexpected happens during sex (i.e. my tongue just accidentally touched your butthole haha) etc.? Women really need to sort out some of their inner issues of what they really want, and what they really mean when they say things. Most guys I know, including myself, hear something someone says, and act on it - because we tend to react on direct dialog. You tell me what you want - I will get it done so you are happy. Anything beyond that, tends to comes across as mind games to me - women are the supreme rulers of "you should just read my mind and know what i want vs. tell me what you want" SO, now that I've made this entirely too long, and covered a few different questions I guess we can sum it up into this question: Why can't women just tell men exactly what they want: with anything? Be direct! come to the point please! your life will be better for it, believe me
blind_otter Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 I'll add one here as well: "Why do the women who read romance-ish type novels (where the leading male is constantly tearing the womans clothes off and having his way with her at every other moment) say: ooo i loved this book, i would love to be taken like this all the time. As a man you decide to fulfill this for them, only to have them turn you down for sex because they're afraid of getting caught doing it outside, afraid of letting themselves completely do it with reckless abandon (i.e. hold back just a little bit) or get self concious or embarrased when something new or unexpected happens during sex (i.e. my tongue just accidentally touched your butthole haha) etc.? Women really need to sort out some of their inner issues of what they really want, and what they really mean when they say things. Most guys I know, including myself, hear something someone says, and act on it - because we tend to react on direct dialog. You tell me what you want - I will get it done so you are happy. Anything beyond that, tends to comes across as mind games to me - women are the supreme rulers of "you should just read my mind and know what i want vs. tell me what you want" SO, now that I've made this entirely too long, and covered a few different questions I guess we can sum it up into this question: Why can't women just tell men exactly what they want: with anything? Be direct! come to the point please! your life will be better for it, believe me Men and women use different communication strategies. They value different things. They very often say the same thing in different words and argue semantics. They have different tolerance levels for bitching. They consider different subjects to be "important". Ultimately the fact of the matter is that we are different cognitive engines connected by a sketchy network. This is true for men and women, if it wasn't there would be no such thing as "Communication" because the need to create a platform on which to present your inner thoughts would be unnecessary -- we would already know what everyone else was thinking. IMO this makes life more interesting. If you want to let it piss you off and make you all flustered, that's on you. I think that the theater of the absurd that in human interaction is fascinating. And I wish you guys would say "Why does my SO...." because I for one hate romance novels, and I've spent years ehxhaustively sorting out my inner issues and continue to do so with or without the extra distraction of a relationship.
laRubiaBonita Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 Feel free to ask a 'Why do women always/never....' question here. I'll start. Why do women say they're not jealous when they really are? Because women get poo-pood on when they are emotional.
Jas Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 Because women get poo-pood on when they are emotional. I agree w/ wwiu - we often feel jealous emotions over things we know we shouldn't be and that it's unattractive to be jealous. We keep it to ourselves. But sometimes it comes out. What bugs me is when guys and girls jokingly make jealous remarks like "you better not talk to any guys when you're out at the club/bar/beach/wherever" but then if there is ever actual jealousy - it's considered immature etc. It's like the passive-agressive way of expressing jealousy.
laRubiaBonita Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 IME- if i am asked "are you jealous?" my automatic response is "Should I be??"
The slayer Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 I'll add one here as well: "Why do the women who read romance-ish type novels (where the leading male is constantly tearing the womans clothes off and having his way with her at every other moment) say: ooo i loved this book, i would love to be taken like this all the time. As a man you decide to fulfill this for them, only to have them turn you down for sex because they're afraid of getting caught doing it outside, afraid of letting themselves completely do it with reckless abandon (i.e. hold back just a little bit) or get self concious or embarrased when something new or unexpected happens during sex (i.e. my tongue just accidentally touched your butthole haha) etc.? Women really need to sort out some of their inner issues of what they really want, and what they really mean when they say things. Most guys I know, including myself, hear something someone says, and act on it - because we tend to react on direct dialog. You tell me what you want - I will get it done so you are happy. Anything beyond that, tends to comes across as mind games to me - women are the supreme rulers of "you should just read my mind and know what i want vs. tell me what you want" SO, now that I've made this entirely too long, and covered a few different questions I guess we can sum it up into this question: Why can't women just tell men exactly what they want: with anything? Be direct! come to the point please! your life will be better for it, believe me I can, I do and you are right.
2020vision Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 IME- if i am asked "are you jealous?" my automatic response is "Should I be??" EXACTLY!! I used to hate when my ex would ask me this then get mad because I would be jealous. Saying that I have "issues"...Well, funny that the girl I was jealous over is now his girl friend! My point is, usually if a woman is jealous its for a reason.
Blackfrost Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 Blind Otter, I'm not asking women to change their whole philosphy on conversations priorities to meet that of mens - that's unrealistic. What I am asking is why - when you really want something from a man, and you know how his "fix it" mentality operates - you can't just come right out and say it. This conversation is not so much spurred by my wife - she and I operate on exactly on the same level of communication (she's a mans mind with a womans body woo hoo!! for me), but many of the women I dated (or my men friends i talk to and commiserate with on their relationship issues) before her, operated on a level that I've described above, and all it seems to do is create confusion or misunderstandings.
blind_otter Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 why - when you really want something from a man, and you know how his "fix it" mentality operates - you can't just come right out and say it. This conversation is not so much spurred by my wife - she and I operate on exactly on the same level of communication (she's a mans mind with a womans body woo hoo!! for me), but many of the women I dated (or my men friends i talk to and commiserate with on their relationship issues) before her, operated on a level that I've described above, and all it seems to do is create confusion or misunderstandings. There is an art to communicating with the opposite sex. My answer to you is that is very likely that those other "non-male-thinking" women actually thought they were answering your questions, but you did not understand the answers. Because of word choice, or just bad communication skills on the part of your past lovers. I mean I hung out with a friend the other day and remembered why I don't hang out with him. Because it takes him for effing ever to make a point and most of the time I get lost halfway through his stumbling meandering thoughts. The "Men are From Mars, Women are from Venus" book isn't just pop psychology at it's oozing best. It's also a pretty good breakdown of the gender differences that separate men and women. I think the problem is that people tend to assume other people think the way that they do. This is conjecture on my part. I am a woman, but most of my friends are male, or lesbians, and I have a hard time connecting with 90% of the female population, so there you go.
laRubiaBonita Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 I think the problem is that people tend to assume other people think the way that they do. This is conjecture on my part. I am a woman, but most of my friends are male, or lesbians, and I have a hard time connecting with 90% of the female population, so there you go. AMEN & Amen
alphamale Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 The "Men are From Mars, Women are from Venus" book isn't just pop psychology at it's oozing best. It's also a pretty good breakdown of the gender differences that separate men and women. That clown who wrote those books is a buffoon...albeit a rich buffoon.
EnigmaXOXO Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 IME- if i am asked "are you jealous?" my automatic response is "Should I be??" My response: "H*ll, Yeah! … It's when I stop caring that you've got something to worry about." And while I may not be the traditional domestic goddess my mother was, I still cook like nobody's business. As a matter of fact, I'm off to boil a bunny right now.
NightsInWhiteSatin Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 Don't know about the rest of the girls here on loveshack but i dont do no mans washing....im not his mother! lol...as for cooking...i burn everything...ping ding in the microwave! haha and no one wants to admit to jealously...not even a 'man', it's an unattractive quality.
Author amerikajin Posted July 14, 2006 Author Posted July 14, 2006 It's when I stop caring that you've got something to worry about." That is so true - for both genders.
lindya Posted July 16, 2006 Posted July 16, 2006 Feel free to ask a 'Why do women always/never....' question here. I'll start. Why do women say they're not jealous when they really are? Because when a man asks "are you jealous" he might as well be saying "here's an opportunity for you to make yourself a lesser woman in my eyes. Do you want to grab it with both hands?" When a woman refuses to bite, she may well just be preserving the relationship against what she suspects is a spot of potential sabotage. With the disclaimer, of course, that this is only from personal experience and observation, I have to say that in theory men like an honest and straightforward woman, but in practice they seem to do a bit better with women who apply selective insight and honesty. Therefore, and based on the last time I confessed to feeling insecure and jealous about a situation, if I'm ever quizzed "are you jealous" I will deny, deny and deny...and, most probably, start questioning the wisdom of getting any deeper into a relationship with someone who needs me to feel that way - but who will almost certainly despise me for feeling it. Issues, anyone???
Woggle Posted July 16, 2006 Posted July 16, 2006 Why do some women feel the need analyze everything instead of living in the moment and enjoying? Some women want to pick apart every aspect of a relationship and go over it with a fine toothed. Many of fights happen because a woman need to have one of those talks because of all the thoughts swirling around on her head. Why can't some women just kick and enjoy things?
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