sassy331 Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 Hi, I am an 18 year old girl,I know alot of adults think that young people don't know what love is but I can garauntee you that you are completely wrong.As many people my age,I have had several boyfriends in my lifetime,ive cried for a couple weeks after breakups and whatnot but Ive always gotten over them...until I met him!...I met a guy when I was still in junior high,however we didn't start going out until I was in grade 10,we went out for 2 and a half years,and as in every relationship we had our ups and downs,our fights and makeups,but we had plans as well,to be together.he gave me a promise ring last chirstmas and it meant so much to me.Then in april he broke up with me,I was completely devastated.We have tried to get back together 3 times since then but it always ends up a "weekend" type thing and then he doesn't bother calling me or anything for awhile.He drinks almost every night of the week now,is constantly partying and everything.The other night me and 3 friends went out to a beach just to relax a bit...little did I know that on the other side of the beach there was a party,and he showed up,he didnt know I was there of course(because I wasn't at the party,just at the beach)and it was dark out...so after I heard him I told my friends I wanted to leave so we went to the car and left.A girl that was at the party went up to my ex and told him that I was there and with another guy...he got up and left,he didnt bother staying there drinking or anything,he just got up and left.He went home and cried and then decided to down a quart of vodka ...he then called me at 1:30 am but i still wasn't home so when i got home i called him back and we talked for awhile(he was pretty drunk)but he was telling me that he was upset about the guy(I explained to him that 2 other people were there besides and I wasn't with any guy)and he told me he still cares about me and he always ends up not getting in touch with me whenever we "get back together" because he thinks I deserve better than him and he's scared to hurt me.and he asked me if it was alright if he told me that he loves me.I need to know,what do I do?how do I help him let go of the alcohol,he's never been like this until we broke up.and how do I convince him that he's the only one I love and want to be with and that he's got to give our relationship a real chance again,in otherwords,I need help or advice bad as to how to get him to understand things and give me another chance,I want to make things better so bad...thanks for any replies:)
MacGyver Posted July 14, 2006 Posted July 14, 2006 Love means many different things, and its different for every person. In saying that, i think that the young can love, but its different to the love someone older feels. As for your situation, your not the problem. It's him and unfortunately he has a problem. Its either he is an alcoholic, which if thats the case, the best thing you can do is try and convince him to talk to someone about it, and the other seems like he is catching up on a missed "life". It just seems that way because he broke up with you and is now going out partying/drinking everynight. I know it hard to go through something like this and my advice to you is to not try to win him back because you will end up pushing him further away, but help him (if he wants help) to sort out that drinking problem (if thats what it is). I'm sure you dont want a "drunk" by your side for the rest of your life...
Author sassy331 Posted July 14, 2006 Author Posted July 14, 2006 thanks for the advice MacGyver...it makes sense at least:)...I think some of it has to do with catching up on the life he's missed out on,becuz he's mentioned stuff like that before,but I forgot to mention that he's badly depressed as well,he's been like this off and on,he believes he's not good enough for me,that he has nothing in his life and he even considers suicide,but I truely believe that this isn't his fault,i believe he has a chemical embalance and should be put on depression pills,however it's hard for me to help him when he keeps leaving.no I don't want an alcoholic by my side for the rest of my life it's true,but I do want him,im in love with him and would do anything in my power to get him the help he needs
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