LikkleMissConfused Posted July 12, 2006 Posted July 12, 2006 Hello, Some advise please. Started seeing this guy. He's sweet and I had a first date with him. He made me feel beautiful and wanted. Over the last week contact has been strange, I've realised he is as nervous as I am. Yesterday he asked if I'm seeing anyone else or dating anyone else. I said no and that I am looking for a relationship. If he wants a good time girl then he should look else where for it. He was good and we had a good chat. Anyway today he rang me, whilst I was texting him, which was kind of spooky. Anyway we talked about stuff and we talked about going to the gym together. He then mentioned one of his conquests at another local gym with a beautician. And how he doesn't go there anymore. I responded with "Thanks I really wanted to know that" I also added "Your really making a good impression". He then apologised. Shall I make a bigger deal about this and say that I don't want to know about his past conquests, or should I be glad that he is such an open book I can read him already. Or just sit back stay quiet and just see? Please advise. Just to add, a part of me thinks he is trying to impress and comes out with silly things that he realises later on! Waiting for your responses.
Sally00 Posted July 12, 2006 Posted July 12, 2006 I don't think you should make a big deal about this at all. Knowing about each other's pasts are fine. But hopefully he won't KEEP ON talking about this beautician over and over and over. This guy once started talking to me. He ended up calling me and couldn't freaking stop talking about all his past girlfriends. I was like, "WHAT THE HELL?!?! Is this supposed to turn me on or somethin'??" But, I ignored it. I let him talk. I didn't know what to say. I was just like, "Yeah.... uh-huh... yeah..." Ha... turns out this guys was a complete a**h***. The worst a**h*** I have ever been involved with. And THAT is saying something. I guess now I know why THOSE relationships ended. So... if he continues to talk about ex-girlfriends or what-not, I think that is showing something. I don't get the point of guys doing that. But you know, if sometimes something reminds them of an ex, it's only natural to say, "Oh this reminds me of _____". My boyfriend does that every now and then... I do that, everyone does. It's not like a complete turn-off or anything. I know he won't go cheat. Just be worried if this is a CONTINUOUS NON-STOP thing.
Author LikkleMissConfused Posted July 12, 2006 Author Posted July 12, 2006 Thanks Sally00 at least you replied...LOL! Thanks. I htink this guy is really sweet so far but yes i will keep an eye on it.
Sally00 Posted July 12, 2006 Posted July 12, 2006 You're very welcome... I'm glad to help! I hope everything goes well for you
Author LikkleMissConfused Posted July 13, 2006 Author Posted July 13, 2006 Sally, another question for you! One thing that really is started to frustrate me with this chap but soemthing I'm not ready to bring up. Is that I tried to call him last night and no response so I left a message saying "I thought i'd call you say hi, your probably busy with the beautician, LOL! anyway give me a call back". I didn't get anything back. He will probably ring me but later. This morning I texted him after my early morning swim, about 8am and asked him to give me a call because I want to discuss the weekend. Still nothing and its now 10:30. I want to start making plans for the weekends as I have been invited out by friends but want to see what he is doing first. As I'm making an effort and would like to get to know him I have to spend time with him. But no immediate response is driving me crazy. Can you advise me. Shall I say anything as its pretty new or just carry on making my own plans. But I wanna make time for him as I want a relationship but its gotta be compromise both ways. What you think?
allina Posted July 13, 2006 Posted July 13, 2006 Eeeek, you shouldn't have text him asking him to call you after calling him and asking him to call you, when he was yet to return your call. Try to take it easy, go on about your plans, and when he gets back to you he gets back to you.
Outcast Posted July 13, 2006 Posted July 13, 2006 your probably busy with the beautician, LOL Kinda witchy, dontcha think? I'd not expect a callback.
Sapiens Posted July 13, 2006 Posted July 13, 2006 "I thought i'd call you say hi, your probably busy with the beautician, LOL! anyway give me a call back". I didn't get anything back. What a REALLY stupid thing to say. I wouldn't call you back, unless you were a really worth it piece of hot ass. -Sapiens
BareGoddess Posted July 13, 2006 Posted July 13, 2006 Yes, I agree. I think you're pushing him away. Also the title of your thread makes me wonder a little...hmmm.
Author LikkleMissConfused Posted July 13, 2006 Author Posted July 13, 2006 OK! OK! I take on board what you are saying. Let me explain, we have this banter and that kind of thing going on where we talk to eachother like that in a joking manner. I know he has took it in in that way so that isn't really my concern. I texted again because I wanted to make plans. I have invited to a few things and didn't want to go ahead and carry on because I want him to feel included. Anyway he called back and we have made plans for the weekend. So its all sorted, until I upset him. After we talked I texted him as a joke but I didn't put lol! So I think it read quite seriously. Anyway I send "make sure you look good tomorrow, don't embarass me infron of my friends" He text back saying "Whatever, please don't tell me what to wear" Whoops now I have upset him. Oh well! I'm supposed to meet him tomorrow so I'll contact him then, see what happens. But yes you are right I need to relax.
Sapiens Posted July 13, 2006 Posted July 13, 2006 OK! OK! I take on board what you are saying. Let me explain, we have this banter and that kind of thing going on where we talk to eachother like that in a joking manner. I know he has took it in in that way so that isn't really my concern. I texted again because I wanted to make plans. I have invited to a few things and didn't want to go ahead and carry on because I want him to feel included. Anyway he called back and we have made plans for the weekend. So its all sorted, until I upset him. After we talked I texted him as a joke but I didn't put lol! So I think it read quite seriously. Anyway I send "make sure you look good tomorrow, don't embarass me infron of my friends" He text back saying "Whatever, please don't tell me what to wear" Whoops now I have upset him. Oh well! I'm supposed to meet him tomorrow so I'll contact him then, see what happens. But yes you are right I need to relax. Txt him back, I do have a right if you come looking like Krusty the clown..LOL LOL Good stuff. -Sapiens
Chinook Posted July 13, 2006 Posted July 13, 2006 Aaah, the joys of a new relationship forming. I'd go with the Krusty the Clown comment. Make it light-hearted, like "Oh, no... I don't mind what you wear, as long as it's not the Krusty the Clown outfit" (with a smilie) And leave it at that. and FWIW, I hate text messaging and email. :blech:
Author LikkleMissConfused Posted July 13, 2006 Author Posted July 13, 2006 More like I'm looking like crusty the clown. I texted him back saying that "I'm only joking Chill! Guess i'll have to make it up with you, how about kiss chase!" He texted back saying "No Thank you" So he is really peed off. I texted him again saying " (Sad face) I meant me chase you for a kiss. Nothing back! Oh well! I read what I sent earlier and it does read bad actually. So I think I should just contact him tomorrow about meeting up? What do you think. Or shoudl I text him saying Sorry later tonight. I did try to call him but no answer.....Whoops
BareGoddess Posted July 13, 2006 Posted July 13, 2006 STOP TEXTING HIM!!!! You are overdoing it. Just wait until you see him and back off.
Sapiens Posted July 13, 2006 Posted July 13, 2006 More like I'm looking like crusty the clown. I texted him back saying that "I'm only joking Chill! Guess i'll have to make it up with you, how about kiss chase!" He texted back saying "No Thank you" So he is really peed off. I texted him again saying " (Sad face) I meant me chase you for a kiss. Nothing back! Oh well! I read what I sent earlier and it does read bad actually. So I think I should just contact him tomorrow about meeting up? What do you think. Or shoudl I text him saying Sorry later tonight. I did try to call him but no answer.....Whoops Don't apologize, be cocky and funny and see how that turns him on! -Sapiens
BareGoddess Posted July 13, 2006 Posted July 13, 2006 Wow! I actually agree with Sapiens a little on that last remark. I wouldn't be cocky though. But I'd forget apologizing. You already said you were joking. Now you need to stop texting and calling. If a guy really likes you, it doesn't matter much that you got a little sassy with him. He'll come running. But if he's not that into you to begin with, he can use all this as an excuse to back off.
Author LikkleMissConfused Posted July 13, 2006 Author Posted July 13, 2006 Thanks Sapiens Are you a woman or a bloke? I just don't like knowing that I have peed someone off or upset them. but if I get in touch again I will annoy him. I would get annoyed if I was him! So I'll take your advise. Just ring him tommorow when i'm in the city.
BareGoddess Posted July 13, 2006 Posted July 13, 2006 Thanks Sapiens Are you a woman or a bloke? I just don't like knowing that I have peed someone off or upset them. but if I get in touch again I will annoy him. I would get annoyed if I was him! So I'll take your advise. Just ring him tommorow when i'm in the city. Sapiens is a guy. And why don't you wait and let HIM call YOU for a change?
Author LikkleMissConfused Posted July 13, 2006 Author Posted July 13, 2006 I'm going to call him because that what we decided earlier. I am going to be local to him in the city tomorrow so he asked if I will let him know when I'm around and I send yes. So you think I should text him and let him now I'm in the city and if he wants to meet he can call me!
BareGoddess Posted July 13, 2006 Posted July 13, 2006 I'm going to call him because that what we decided earlier. I am going to be local to him in the city tomorrow so he asked if I will let him know when I'm around and I send yes. So you think I should text him and let him now I'm in the city and if he wants to meet he can call me! That sounds good but why not just call him since you both agreed on that already? But don't contact him anymore until tomorrow!!!!
Author LikkleMissConfused Posted July 13, 2006 Author Posted July 13, 2006 Thank you! I need advice from a man! I was in a relationship for five years when I was younger. Single for four years and I just really don't know how to behave. Because my last relationship just happened. So thanks mate for the advice. I think i'll text him letting him know i'm in the city and then he can call me when he is ready to meet. But your right I'll back off.
Chinook Posted July 13, 2006 Posted July 13, 2006 More like I'm looking like crusty the clown. I texted him back saying that "I'm only joking Chill! Guess i'll have to make it up with you, how about kiss chase!" He texted back saying "No Thank you" So he is really peed off. I texted him again saying " (Sad face) I meant me chase you for a kiss. Nothing back! Oh well! I read what I sent earlier and it does read bad actually. So I think I should just contact him tomorrow about meeting up? What do you think. Or shoudl I text him saying Sorry later tonight. I did try to call him but no answer.....Whoops Okay, what's going on here is you're overanalysing and going with what you're feeling from minute to minute. Stop. Think. You offended him. Give him a chance to process and think about it. You already said you were joking and apologised. I guarantee it, he's going to pull back right now. You're going to have to let him do that. Stop texting him. Let him come to you. Give him time. Really. If you go chasing him it will feel like he's having the noose tied around his neck! Boys don't like that feeling. And who can blame them...?! Sit back, relax and let things play out. Stop texting because the more you do, the more damage you're going to cause. Leave it now. The less you say, the more mysterious you will seem. It will make him wonder. Let things play out now.
Author LikkleMissConfused Posted July 13, 2006 Author Posted July 13, 2006 yes i am over analysing. Your are right! What do I do tomorrow let him know I'm in the city or just leave it?
Sally00 Posted July 13, 2006 Posted July 13, 2006 Sally, another question for you! One thing that really is started to frustrate me with this chap but soemthing I'm not ready to bring up. Is that I tried to call him last night and no response so I left a message saying "I thought i'd call you say hi, your probably busy with the beautician, LOL! anyway give me a call back". I didn't get anything back. He will probably ring me but later. This morning I texted him after my early morning swim, about 8am and asked him to give me a call because I want to discuss the weekend. Still nothing and its now 10:30. I want to start making plans for the weekends as I have been invited out by friends but want to see what he is doing first. As I'm making an effort and would like to get to know him I have to spend time with him. But no immediate response is driving me crazy. Can you advise me. Shall I say anything as its pretty new or just carry on making my own plans. But I wanna make time for him as I want a relationship but its gotta be compromise both ways. What you think? I think you should wait till he returns your call. He's probably out being busy and stuff. Just give him some time. That's what I did with guys. Let them know you don't NEEEEED them (yeah I know you want him) but play a LITTLE hard to get.
Chinook Posted July 13, 2006 Posted July 13, 2006 yes i am over analysing. Your are right! What do I do tomorrow let him know I'm in the city or just leave it? Aaaw come on LMC, he knows you like him. He knows you are going to be in the City anyways... I'd leave it and see if he calls you. For what it's worth, if a guy is going to get a little annoyed over a minor spat like this I doubt it's worth your time. Also, think back to that first date. What I'm sensing here is a little of the 'less-is-more' thing. If you weren't that into him and have given him so-so signals... when he backs off.... that more often than not, makes the girl re-evaluate and think and over-analyse and wonder what in the hell happened and WHY isn't he into her... and so ensues the chase. But... when you come right down to it... at the start, you probably could have taken or left him right..? So, go back to the beginning... take it easy and let him come to you. If he's into you and wants to be with you, this thing will blow over sooner or later. Besides, you guys made plans for the weekend.
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