Bit of a problem with break up and need some /

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My girlfriend has just finished with me. We were going out for five months, although she was away for two of them. We didn't really get too involved and it is one of those break ups where you know it's going to be alright seeing each other again. But, here's the dilemna.

 

The reason why we broke up is because she said we were two different personalities. She has a strong personality, where as I don't. She also said it was the wrong time. I had been suffering from depression for the last two years. Although the worst of it is over I still suffer from lack of confidence and anxiety. My ex girlfriend was a mental health student nurse and she chose to prob me for her work. Then she decided to run away so there I was thinking I must hide everything from any girl I ever go out with so that they don't leg it. I did that with Claire, and I found that I just couldn't open up to her. Conversation was difficult, and maybe she felt she couldn't open with me. Therefore we didn't really get to know each other that well. Completly different person with her friends.

 

OK yes I'm gutted. I think if timings was better maybe things would have worked better (we started going out as soon as I moved to Reading). But I'm not trying to get back with her. What I want is our friendship to work, and I don't want to be the same as with the relationship. But I felt if I did tell her some of the bad things that I tried to hide it might help things. I don't wish to give her a sore ear or make myself look feeble. I'm just not sure what to do. I want to change and I've asked to go in for CBT, but that could take ages. I want to become stronger minded (and not for her I wanted it for ages). I'm sick of being dumped for similar reasons and I don't want it to happen again.

 

All I want is to feel loved and respected. Maybe not from Claire as that's not going to happen from her, but I want her to be my friend. Really don't know what to do to stop myself looking boring and feeble. I don't know if you know what I'm asking, it's hard to articulate. But I want to relax with my girlfriend and I don't know how without pouring my heart out and making myself feel crap.