Burning Posted July 11, 2006 Posted July 11, 2006 My neighbor. Every time I see him my heartbeat quickens. I get so turned on just standing in the same room that he is in. I fantasize about him multiple times a day. I can't get him off my mind. When we talk, it's like we've known each other since childhood. His smile makes me melt. I know that he has the same feelings. We are both married, and have neither of us have any intentions of leaving our spouse. How do we keep this desire from engulfing us?
Outcast Posted July 11, 2006 Posted July 11, 2006 Realize this is just biology. We are, after all, animals. The kind of attraction you're talking about is the kind of attraction built into humans to get them to procreate. Think of it like the itch from a mosquito bite - annoying and something you have to ignore. How? Occupy yourself with other things. Spend more time with your family. Take up some new hobbies. Hang out with your friends more. When you start thinking about him, go read a book or watch a show or call a friend. Treat this as what it is - a type of addiction that you have to defeat by not feeding it. Allowing yourself to fantasize about him builds your feelings for him. So cut it out. I can't get him off my mind Yes you can. You can do anything if you want to but you have to be willing to put effort into it.
Bryanp Posted July 11, 2006 Posted July 11, 2006 Maybe you should imagine how you would feel if your husband had the same feelings for a female neighbor of yours and fantasized about her it three times a day.
Burning Posted July 11, 2006 Posted July 11, 2006 Realize this is just biology. We are, after all, animals. The kind of attraction you're talking about is the kind of attraction built into humans to get them to procreate. Think of it like the itch from a mosquito bite - annoying and something you have to ignore. How? Occupy yourself with other things. Spend more time with your family. Take up some new hobbies. Hang out with your friends more. When you start thinking about him, go read a book or watch a show or call a friend. Treat this as what it is - a type of addiction that you have to defeat by not feeding it. Allowing yourself to fantasize about him builds your feelings for him. So cut it out. Yes you can. You can do anything if you want to but you have to be willing to put effort into it. You are so right. Thank you. I've never had much will power but nothing has ever been this important either. I just wish it wasn't so hard.
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