Sadistic_Life Posted July 11, 2006 Posted July 11, 2006 Hahaha, okay, so how do you let someone know that you want to have sex? I mean, if you know the other party is interested, but he/she has never directly stated it, how do you bring it up without sounding ridiculous? I mean, I guess you could just come out and say, "So, you wanna $@%&? Or, you could surprise him/her with a make-out session...sit on his/her lap...grab a body part... Okay, so seriously, how do you let someone know that you are ready? I mean, this person has let me know that he wants a "fling," and in all honesty, so do I (he is single, but isn't ready for a relationship; and we are already friends). At this point, I don't really care that we will be FWB--I am leaving the city soon, so I don't really want a serious relationship anyway. The problem is, he is shy, though he has let me know that he was interested in a "fling with a friend of his" (I already know it is me), but I am shy as well, so I don't really know how to engage this. Okay, so I am thinking that I should just surprise him with a makeout session, but we don't really get much time alone together, so I would probably need to meet him somewhere. Okay, so what do I say to let him know? Agh! It is so hard to trying to be sexy/smooth; I mean, imagine Sandra Bullock trying to be seductive...that is me. The goofy, clutzy (sp?) girl, trying to be sexy...so bad. Any advice would be much appreciated! Thank you!
amaysngrace Posted July 11, 2006 Posted July 11, 2006 You had it right...take him and kiss him. Just whenever the mood strikes you, go for it. I'm bettin' he's gonna respond.
lovestruck234 Posted July 11, 2006 Posted July 11, 2006 I agree. If he has already stated that he wants a fling with you, what are you worried about? If hes' hanging out with you, it's obvious he's interested and it's obvious he's wanting you just as bad... Time for a little tonsil hockey!!!
Author Sadistic_Life Posted July 11, 2006 Author Posted July 11, 2006 I agree. If he has already stated that he wants a fling with you, what are you worried about? If hes' hanging out with you, it's obvious he's interested and it's obvious he's wanting you just as bad... Time for a little tonsil hockey!!! ...you see, the problem is that neither of us are engaging anything. I am pretty sure that he assumes that I only like him as a friend, so he won't make a move. I am not 100% sure that the "friend" of whom he speaks is me, though I am pretty sure. I just don't know how to make the first move (because I have never had to before); I just don't want to make an ass out of myself. God, I didn't realize how hard men have it trying to hit on women, worried about rejection; I will be much more empathetic to those people who hit on me who I don't care for; my rejection line use to be "I am going to be a Nun." Yeah, I know, that's horrible. Now karma is going to bit my ass, I just know it .
lovestruck234 Posted July 11, 2006 Posted July 11, 2006 Awww now your just over-analyzing things and this is only brought on by you having the jitters about this whole thing. Maybe even whack a couple of drinks down to relax you a bit....? All in all, just relax and be yourself. If you don't want to do it, don't do it.
Author Sadistic_Life Posted July 11, 2006 Author Posted July 11, 2006 Awww now your just over-analyzing things and this is only brought on by you having the jitters about this whole thing. Maybe even whack a couple of drinks down to relax you a bit....? All in all, just relax and be yourself. If you don't want to do it, don't do it. Oh, I definately want to "do it." Yeah, I think I will need a few drinks...
stillhere Posted July 11, 2006 Posted July 11, 2006 When you walk by him, slap him on the a$$, then turn around and wink at him, but be very casual about it. Like it's no big deal. Later on, when you are alone (and if he responded positively to the a$$ slap) just walk up to him, and kiss him! I can understand your fears about rejection, but if you guys are already friends, then you should be somewhat comfortable around him. I used to be shy and timid, but then i started to think, i'm never going to get what i want if i don't take chances and go get it. Believe me, it's paid off for me many times. And guys love it when a girl takes charge and goes after what they want, especially if it's them!
lovestruck234 Posted July 11, 2006 Posted July 11, 2006 Oh, I definately want to "do it." Well, do it.
Author Sadistic_Life Posted July 12, 2006 Author Posted July 12, 2006 They'll know once you're married. Um, that is a nice sentiment, but I don't believe in the institute of marriage... Why bother when half end in divorce, and 80% of the half that doesn't are nothing more than a sham (affairs anyone?)? Anyway, that is a whole other topic, and one of which I don't care to debate right now; I am tired.
Author Sadistic_Life Posted July 12, 2006 Author Posted July 12, 2006 Well, do it. Easier said than done. It will be my first time, and I have no idea what I am doing, where as he is more experienced. I just don't know how to initiate it, but I will have to try the slap on the ass !
lovestruck234 Posted July 12, 2006 Posted July 12, 2006 Easier said than done. It will be my first time, and I have no idea what I am doing, where as he is more experienced. I just don't know how to initiate it, but I will have to try the slap on the ass ! Yeah, I know that. But you need to overcome the fact that you think you'll suck at it or make an idiot of yourself. The more you think that, the more likely that's how it will turn out. Just think sexy, don't think Sandra Bullock...(yeeshh! ) and you'll be fine. (I'm sure your not as bad as her!!!) If this guy wasn't that into you, he wouldn't be spending as much time with you as he is. Guaranteed. And especially if he's spending alot of one on one time with you as well. Hmmmm....I don't really know what else to say cos the only person that can help you overcome these jitters is you. If you've become fairly good mates then I don't see the big deal either. By now, you should be pretty comfortable around him. Just organise a night for the two of you to have a dinner or something at your house. Make sure the wine's flowing and go in for the kill. there's no point sitting around thinking "what if...?" Life's all about taking a chance. And if you fail, well, that's just unlucky on his behalf!
Yamaha Posted July 13, 2006 Posted July 13, 2006 A look will usually tell a guy that the time is right. If you want him then just convey that with your eyes. Get close enough to each other that he will want to kiss you and kissing will usually lead to other things. Breath into his ear ( always send me over the edge ) and when the passion hits you both will know what to do. You realize that if you do this thing and you become involved it might become hard for you to move. If you haven't been involved before then having sex might send you in a tailspin. Do you think you could handle a FWB relationship?
lovestruck234 Posted July 13, 2006 Posted July 13, 2006 Another thing that just popped to mind..... A guy penis usually starts to take over when anything sexual is on the cards. If you do the things Yamaha said to do, I'd say it will be hard for him to say no. The brain usually goes out the window at this point. Just a little thing I do to my bf that sets him off is when he's sitting on the couch I come up behind him and kiss the back of his neck. He says it feels like the most erotic part of his body (apart from his penis) and sends him into a spin. Just a really soft kiss but enough to feel your lips on him. If he can also feel my warm breath on the back of his neck he said this is also a way to get things...ahem...erect. Once a girl gives a guy the nod, he usually takes full advantage of that and will leap on you like a tiger! Grrr! Basically what Yamaha said. Look into his eyes. "Tell" him that you want him. Looking beyond his eyes... All the best, keep us posted!
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