miracgirl Posted July 6, 2006 Posted July 6, 2006 Don't you think dating can be so cold? I just had four dates with someone and I thought we had a really good time, but I guess all he wanted was sex. I told him I wasn't ready yet but he was really pushing, so we tried and we had to stop because it hurt and i told him it had been a long time for me since i slept with anyone and then I told him i wasn't in the mood anymore. Well, that's the last i heard from him. I thought this guy liked me. Was i asking too much for him to wait longer? If he liked me, how cold is it that he can just walk away because of this??
BareGoddess Posted July 6, 2006 Posted July 6, 2006 That's why you should really get to know someone very well before you sleep with them. Four dates is too soon in my opinion. I'ts clear he was only after one thing and not really interested in getting to know you. Better luck next time! Just learn from this.
Pyro Posted July 6, 2006 Posted July 6, 2006 Don't you think dating can be so cold? I just had four dates with someone and I thought we had a really good time, but I guess all he wanted was sex. I told him I wasn't ready yet but he was really pushing, so we tried and we had to stop because it hurt and i told him it had been a long time for me since i slept with anyone and then I told him i wasn't in the mood anymore. Well, that's the last i heard from him. I thought this guy liked me. Was i asking too much for him to wait longer? If he liked me, how cold is it that he can just walk away because of this?? People can sure be selfish. If someone is going to push the idea of sex, then chances are that is all they want. A respectful individual would wait for you to be ready as well. 4 dates is rather quick to be engaging in sex. Use this as a learning tool and watch out for this type of behavior on future dates. Another thing to look out for is what your date will talk about. If someone only wants sex, a majority of the date usually consists of flirting. If someone wanted to truly get to know you, they would engage in a real conversation and ask questions about who you are.
Author miracgirl Posted July 6, 2006 Author Posted July 6, 2006 People can sure be selfish. If someone is going to push the idea of sex, then chances are that is all they want. A respectful individual would wait for you to be ready as well. 4 dates is rather quick to be engaging in sex. Use this as a learning tool and watch out for this type of behavior on future dates. Another thing to look out for is what your date will talk about. If someone only wants sex, a majority of the date usually consists of flirting. If someone wanted to truly get to know you, they would engage in a real conversation and ask questions about who you are. well, that's just it... he didn't just flirt.. the conversation was very normal..he asked me lots of questions about me..i feel like I was conned!! the conversations on the phone hardly ever were flirtatious. I guess sex was just very important to him..maybe he felt I was disinterested in it? or in him in that way since i said i wasn't in the mood?? could he be insulted?
Pyro Posted July 6, 2006 Posted July 6, 2006 well, that's just it... he didn't just flirt.. the conversation was very normal..he asked me lots of questions about me..i feel like I was conned!! the conversations on the phone hardly ever were flirtatious. I guess sex was just very important to him..maybe he felt I was disinterested in it? or in him in that way since i said i wasn't in the mood?? could he be insulted? Like I stated above, if he is pushing the idea for sex in anyway possible, then chances are that is all he is looking for. Usually, the sex talk is discussed before anything happens but you said he kept pushing the idea. Just be on the lookout for this type of behavior in the future.
MarnieGirl Posted July 6, 2006 Posted July 6, 2006 maybe he felt awkward, or like he did something wrong. did you try to call him? because he may be thinking he screwed up or hurt you and is wondering why YOU haven't called. it isn't really fair to assume this person used you for sex. it could be any number of reasons why he hasn't called, from just changing his mind to being kidnapped. hey, nothing is certain.
jerbear Posted July 6, 2006 Posted July 6, 2006 I agree with riddler on this one, four dates is rather soon for sex and all talk is sex not flirting or other conversations. If anyone, gals and guys, talk sex first then they are after one thing; and mentioned it first. After 4 dates and sex is the first thing, you both agreed to it. Although it is hard to notice tale tale signs when one has rosy glasses on; remember the behaviors if you want a friends with benefits (FWB) situation and move on from this as the deed is already done.
Author miracgirl Posted July 6, 2006 Author Posted July 6, 2006 I agree with riddler on this one, four dates is rather soon for sex and all talk is sex not flirting or other conversations. If anyone, gals and guys, talk sex first then they are after one thing; and mentioned it first. After 4 dates and sex is the first thing, you both agreed to it. Although it is hard to notice tale tale signs when one has rosy glasses on; remember the behaviors if you want a friends with benefits (FWB) situation and move on from this as the deed is already done. well, I said that we weren't talking sex, we talked about other things. He seemed to not be interested in just sex from me..
Asafan Posted July 6, 2006 Posted July 6, 2006 Every first date I ever went on felt like a job interview for the position of boyfriend.
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