9Lives Posted July 4, 2006 Posted July 4, 2006 Girls, this is it....I am finished. I have been in this situation before and it only gets worse every time i think. This guy I had been seeing has drove me nuts!!!! I probably done it to myself by getting involved. I called him today like maybe 50 times like a idiot....I called his house....priviate.....I called her cell phone...private.....I am out of control. I have to let go before I do something completely stupid. It is so funny because everyone around me says I have changed....I use to be happy, fun, funny, exciting.....I gave all that away being with this guy. I read a post that said.....i miss me.....I can relate to that....and I told him that I miss myself. I had to walk away......I feel like I was going to lose my mind...for real. I had become consumed with him....it is ridiculous.....just sad and ugly. Alll because I love a MM.....what a fu/cking idiot......someone should have just slapped the hell out of me and said .....wake up b/ this guy is UNAVAILABLE.....No matter what the hell he says.....I feel like s/hit. I really really do.
magichands Posted July 4, 2006 Posted July 4, 2006 You've already paid the price. And there's no money-back guarantee here. In fact, unless you pass go soon you'll be going directly to jail. You don't have the monopoly on these feelings. Bottom line - get a grip. Take a deep breath. Smile, and remember that you're worth something!!!!
newbby Posted July 4, 2006 Posted July 4, 2006 hello 9lives, i replied to your other thread. i am going thru the same thing, i reached a point where i no longer felt i had a grip on my emotions and although i didnt really outwardly lose control i can certainly see how it can come to that. give yourself some credit, that you have identified this in yourself and chosen to do something about it by removing yourself from the situation. try to look at the whole thing as a personal challenge rather than a big mistake.
movinon05 Posted July 4, 2006 Posted July 4, 2006 In order to continue moving forward and away from all that mess, you need to stay angry. Beware that as days go by, your anger will subside, your heart may soften. That is when you fall back into the rut again. That is why they call it a rollercoaster. You have to make the commitment to stay off the rollercoaster. Its a wild ride. Try a ride that doesn't go in circles, like go-carts - so you can take out your anger!
yesmaybe Posted July 4, 2006 Posted July 4, 2006 Are you in love with the MM? Or are you in love with the idea of him, and the drama he brings to your life? I'm curious to know some back story as well. Are you in your 20's, and is this MM one of your first "real" relationships? One thing you can do immediately - wear a rubber band around your wrist. As soon as you think of him...snap yourself, really hard. Your brain will start associating MM with the physical pain, and will be reluctant to think of him after a while.
Author 9Lives Posted July 4, 2006 Author Posted July 4, 2006 No I am not in my 20's and I am too old to be acting this ugly. I am losing my mind right now. I wish I could just calm down.
incognito Posted July 5, 2006 Posted July 5, 2006 In order to continue moving forward and away from all that mess, you need to stay angry. Beware that as days go by, your anger will subside, your heart may soften. That is when you fall back into the rut again. That is why they call it a rollercoaster. You have to make the commitment to stay off the rollercoaster. Its a wild ride. Try a ride that doesn't go in circles, like go-carts - so you can take out your anger! wow....is that ever the truth
Author 9Lives Posted July 5, 2006 Author Posted July 5, 2006 Update....he came over this morning because I was blowning up his phone all night and morning.....He was like why are you doing this? I said you know why....I told him let's just be good friend. I dont want to be involved like I was....I feel so much better. I am going to start dating and doing whatever my heart desire is. He did not want me to leave as usual and I dont care about that anymore. Dont get me wrong...I love him dearly but I am not interested in this type of relationship....I told him I wont be taking him seriously until he is living in his own place inviting me over to entertain me. Who know when that will happen...but that doesnt matter either. So it worked out for me. I am doing me now.
bunset Posted July 5, 2006 Posted July 5, 2006 Update....he came over this morning because I was blowning up his phone all night and morning.....He was like why are you doing this? I said you know why....I told him let's just be good friend. I dont want to be involved like I was....I feel so much better. I am going to start dating and doing whatever my heart desire is. He did not want me to leave as usual and I dont care about that anymore. Dont get me wrong...I love him dearly but I am not interested in this type of relationship....I told him I wont be taking him seriously until he is living in his own place inviting me over to entertain me. Who know when that will happen...but that doesnt matter either. So it worked out for me. I am doing me now. Good move ... except for being good friends. It's my understanding that doesn't work. You may ahve to just cut everything off... at least for a while. Yes, you are absolutely right that he has to be free and clear for a while. take it a step at a time and don't ever let him have that kind of power over you again.
Author 9Lives Posted July 5, 2006 Author Posted July 5, 2006 Yeah I can handle being good friends cause I dont feel like I have to just be with him like before. As long as he is not rubbing s/hit in my face. If that does not happen we should be fine. I feel better already
JCD Posted July 7, 2006 Posted July 7, 2006 I think you're at the point where you're crossing into the I don't care anymore zone. That's good because as you get tired of the drama you don't bring it out as much and that helps you to forget and get on with your life. I'm where you are now, except it's a married woman(ie. my coworker) who went back to her husband after using me as a safety net. I was trying to rescue her from her abusive husband but they deserve each other as I came to realize. Next time I won't get involved with girl that has so much baggage. I hope you do the same and stay strong because I did and am finally free of her and I'm my happy self again.
bunset Posted July 7, 2006 Posted July 7, 2006 I think you're at the point where you're crossing into the I don't care anymore zone. That's good because as you get tired of the drama you don't bring it out as much and that helps you to forget and get on with your life. I'm where you are now, except it's a married woman(ie. my coworker) who went back to her husband after using me as a safety net. I was trying to rescue her from her abusive husband but they deserve each other as I came to realize. Next time I won't get involved with girl that has so much baggage. I hope you do the same and stay strong because I did and am finally free of her and I'm my happy self again. Conratulations JCD... On your ability to move on. Yes, please let everyone know that it's not just MM that can use the 'other', but there are a few MW that do it, too. It's a shame.
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