DebinDenver Posted July 4, 2006 Posted July 4, 2006 Today is our 4th anniversary. No fireworks here. Been taking really good care of myself since H ran away on May 17th. I think he is in Australia, at least that's what his bank statement says. He hasn't told me where he is or where he is going - only that he will be on a "crazy adventure" for the remainder of the year. I am convinced he is having a MLC. Communication from H consists of few and far between emails - he only talks about financial stuff. So on our anniversary, I planned to send an email telling him all the things I have learned lately about saving our marriage. Just an FYI sort of email, no pressure. In the past, he has read these emails and taken them to heart - this I am sure of. But, his email address has been closed, his cell phone has been disconnected. So, I sent the email to his work email, but I'm not sure he even checks that, since he is not really working right now. Since this work email is my only connection remaining to H, I called the sailing buddy that he took off with and left a voice mail asking him to tell H that I sent the email to his work email address. Cutting off communication is about the worst thing I can think of on the anniversay date. Obviously he doesn't want to hear from me. His last email to me was on June 17th - wanted to know if I was OK and said it would be "a long time" before he would be in touch again. This email was sent by H on my email address. He set up the address for me, so he knows the password. I told him he can use this email address any time - he can just check the sent emails to see what I sent him. So, I guess we can still communicate, if he is so inclined. But, it is rather disappointing for this to happen on our anniversary. Deb
Pink Amulet Posted July 4, 2006 Posted July 4, 2006 I really can't believe I am reading this. This is by far the worst story of neglect I have ever heard. I don't know what to say part from advising you to leave this man emotionally the way he physically left you. If I were you, I would pack my life up, and move away. I would start my life again. He sounds like an absolutely horrible excuse for a man. If/when he comes back to what he believed to be the stable, reliable, and constant security in his life (aka you) you will have given him a taste of his own medicine. Why would you want to be with someone who left you in this way? If he loved you, he would never put you through the agony of *not knowing*. There is nothing worse than being kept in the dark. Get out of this relationship, and act as though he and his friend were killed on their "crazy adventure". Treat his departure as a death you will not mourn. Good luck to you.
Pink Amulet Posted July 4, 2006 Posted July 4, 2006 P.S give me a description, and if I see him down here, I will cut off his balls.
Blazelet Posted July 4, 2006 Posted July 4, 2006 Why would you want to be with someone who left you in this way? If he loved you, he would never put you through the agony of *not knowing*. There is nothing worse than being kept in the dark. Get out of this relationship, and act as though he and his friend were killed on their "crazy adventure". Wow, amen. Your H is not treating you like a man should treat a woman. He is out doing what he wants, only giving you enough to keep hope. Treating it as a death is probably the best advice, focus on self improvement and personal growth, being happy on your own ... and no matter what happens, you'll be better for it. Personally I found a lot of strength in constantly keeping busy, working out, strengthening a lot of friendships, fixing up my house, meeting new people. I have made some friends in the last two months that I now highly value. P.S. - I hope to never get on Pink Amulet's bad side.
justagirliegirl Posted July 4, 2006 Posted July 4, 2006 The acts of selfishness never cease to amaze me. I agree with Pink Amulet on this one. He has closed his email and disconnected his mobile? Sounds like he has abandoned his marriage. File for a divorce. Remove all the money from the bank accounts. Contact him and tell him you have a great big surprise for him when he gets back!
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