Diver012 Posted July 3, 2006 Posted July 3, 2006 I don't like to move on from a hurtfull experience until Ive gained something positive from it first. It doesnt always happen that way, but it does happen, and if you look hard enough, you can find just a tiny piece of knowledge that you can benefit from. I have been hurt many times in the past. Mostly due to my own attitude. Chasing after unavailable women. Women that had no interest in me. Couldnt let it go.. why oh why dont they like me? Whats wrong with me.. blah blah blah... crap I havent felt in over 10 years... even longer. I learned to tuck my heart away until I found someone that was worthy of its attention. I have had wonderful relationships since that moment of clarity. I was asked once by someone I loved, where I thought the relationship was going. I got so scared out of my mind it was obvious. I went into this panicked speal of relationships not having direction, but growing and changing ect... actually said that I dont like to think of relationships having a direction because it means theres an ending. They exist and grow and blossom.. What I have learned is... I had a fear of commitment. I used to say... I would rather spend the rest of my life alone, than waking up next to someone that didnt want me there, or that I didnt want to be there with. I was waiting for my "Cinderella" Folks, She, and for the ladies, HE, dont exist. Not possible. There is no perfect Soul Mate. There is no everlasting love. ALL THINGS END! Write that down. Take a picture of it. Every single cottin pickin relationship you will ever have in your life time will end... and most likely end badly. Why.. it all ends 1 of 2 ways... Breakup/Divorce or Death. The one you love, one day, will either break up with you, or will pass on. I learned that its not the end that matters, its the moments in between the endings that matter the most. Im not afraid anymore. One of the hardest lessons I have ever learned.
allina Posted July 3, 2006 Posted July 3, 2006 There is no perfect Soul Mate. There is no everlasting love. ALL THINGS END! Write that down. Take a picture of it. Every single cottin pickin relationship you will ever have in your life time will end... and most likely end badly. learned. Ok, it may be because I'm a major optimist but I have to disagree with that. Yes, of course all things end when we die but that is not to say that there is no such thing as everlasting love, there are couples who grow old together and love eachother till their last days, in my eyes that's very everlasting. Also, I don't think it has anything to do with some fairy tale fantasy, you can be realistic without being jaded or negative. Something I have learned from my past relationships, especially my last one is to always listen to those gut feelings that I have to often ignored. They have been right each and every time, and no amount of ignoring them or covering them up has changed that.
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